- metadata
- version 2024.5
- entries
- uuid 73A3B035481D4C669E41CD4DDB5F0579
- starred false
- pinned false
- text '
- ,
- .
- So
- My mother was shouting at me this morning
- And admitted she took my dildo
- Give it back Lillian
- And also said she '''doesn't want to see me in the house doing nothing.... and eating '''
- Akasema najifanya najua. Others are doing a lot of things at 24. As usual my shits get bumped up.
- I ignore it because she says it a lot and I don't know what it means.
- ***
- > Talk to me through your day
- > Tell me how your day goes
- It will be trash, I already feel like crying, she threw out my hats
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"So\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"My mother was shouting at me this morning\n"},{"text":"And admitted she took my dildo\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"Give it back Lillian\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"And also said she \u0027\u0027\u0027doesn\u0027t want to see me in the house doing nothing.... and eating \u0027\u0027\u0027\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"Akasema najifanya najua. Others are doing a lot of things at 24. As usual my shits get bumped up.\n"},{"text":"I ignore it because she says it a lot and I don\u0027t know what it means.\n"},{"embeddedObjects":[{"type":"horizontalRuleLine"}]},{"attributes":{"line":{"indentLevel":1,"quote":true}},"text":"Talk to me through your day\n"},{"attributes":{"line":{"indentLevel":1,"quote":true}},"text":"Tell me how your day goes\n"},{"text":"It will be trash, I already feel like crying, she threw out my hats\n"},{"text":"\n"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":456},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2024-04-03T04:23:23Z
- modifiedDate 2024-04-04T19:40:18Z
- creationDevice 23129RAA4G
- creationOSName Android
- creationOSVersion 13
- creationDeviceType Xiaomi
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid 8D49038C1CEE4FDDBA32208996286EB0
- starred false
- pinned false
- text # '
- # ,
- # ,
- # .
- I'm at home, I had to ask dad for cash,
- Had to call Jackline to drop off the pan at his office, haven't called Rachel
- Phil texted me , I didn't see it
- Jackline misoy called me, Pauline called me to complain, like damn
- I didn't tell you Pauline because you pissed me off Friday, and if you were doing things before I came, you can do them when I leave.
- richText {"contents":[{"attributes":{"line":{"header":1}},"text":"\u0027\n"},{"attributes":{"line":{"header":1}},"text":",\n"},{"attributes":{"line":{"header":1}},"text":",\n"},{"attributes":{"line":{"header":1}},"text":".\n"},{"text":"I\u0027m at home, I had to ask dad for cash,\n"},{"text":"Had to call Jackline to drop off the pan at his office, haven\u0027t called Rachel\n"},{"text":"Phil texted me , I didn\u0027t see it\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"Jackline misoy called me, Pauline called me to complain, like damn\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I didn\u0027t tell you Pauline because you pissed me off Friday, and if you were doing things before I came, you can do them when I leave."}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":456},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2024-04-02T07:48:28Z
- modifiedDate 2024-04-04T16:13:08Z
- creationDevice 23129RAA4G
- creationOSName Android
- creationOSVersion 13
- creationDeviceType Xiaomi
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid D49C715B884E44A6B79F10C7341D7EED
- starred false
- pinned false
- text A new month
- It's April so another month of living
- With myself
- Going to work
- And with my mother
- Happy easter
- I took a large fat poop with Dark flecks, it stank of sukuma wiki. It was also soft
- ***
- You forgot but you are forgiven
- Take care of yourself in a world that wants you to harm yourself
- Never ever take leave around the holidays, your home life is shite, your mother has nothing to do, She isn't at work, never take leave around the holidays
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"A new month\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"It\u0027s April so another month of living\n"},{"text":"With myself\n"},{"text":"Going to work\n"},{"text":"And with my mother\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"Happy easter\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I took a large fat poop with Dark flecks, it stank of sukuma wiki. It was also soft\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"embeddedObjects":[{"type":"horizontalRuleLine"}]},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"You forgot but you are forgiven\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"Take care of yourself in a world that wants you to harm yourself\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"Never ever take leave around the holidays, your home life is shite, your mother has nothing to do, She isn\u0027t at work, never take leave around the holidays\n"},{"text":"\n"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":456},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2024-04-01T05:02:39Z
- modifiedDate 2024-04-04T16:13:00Z
- creationDevice 23129RAA4G
- creationOSName Android
- creationOSVersion 13
- creationDeviceType Xiaomi
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid CDB7D84725E2424EACFA46B531FD1C1C
- starred false
- pinned false
- text '
- ,
- .
- So
- I'm taking a long ass poo, it's shot out in less than a minute
- ***
- I met with aunt Jane
- I hit a bike , sike ya wedo imeisha
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"So\n"},{"text":"I\u0027m taking a long ass poo, it\u0027s shot out in less than a minute\n"},{"embeddedObjects":[{"type":"horizontalRuleLine"}]},{"text":"I met with aunt Jane\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I hit a bike , sike ya wedo imeisha\n"},{"text":"\n"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":456},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2024-03-29T04:00:41Z
- modifiedDate 2024-04-04T16:12:57Z
- creationDevice 23129RAA4G
- creationOSName Android
- creationOSVersion 13
- creationDeviceType Xiaomi
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid 1FEB40165CC74228945B7858F499A17A
- starred false
- pinned false
- text '
- ,
- .
- So
- I feel like I was a cunt today
- So what happened was, I was looking for Annie Mungai, I went up, busy with bigwigs, came down, met Laini.
- Sat down, got up again when I heard her voice, she was saying hi to Catherine, the same Catherine to whom I have never said a word about her funeral, not even a sorry or anything. She hugged Catherine, then she saw me hanging around like a creep, hugged me, asked about my wellbeing, then I told her 'bout the memo and she said it was ok
- I felt like I was being a creep
- ***
- thank god, laini just has rizz on rizz, but a receding hairline and uncombed hair
- Thank Jesus
- Im stressed
- ***
- Got home ,big poop but I'm in bed so ...
- Also I think fil and I had that final call over WhatsApp \& I said I'm not for it, I don't want to go forward.
- I think that is the end of the road for us.
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"So\n"},{"text":"I feel like I was a cunt today\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"So what happened was, I was looking for Annie Mungai, I went up, busy with bigwigs, came down, met Laini.\n"},{"text":"Sat down, got up again when I heard her voice, she was saying hi to Catherine, the same Catherine to whom I have never said a word about her funeral, not even a sorry or anything. She hugged Catherine, then she saw me hanging around like a creep, hugged me, asked about my wellbeing, then I told her \u0027bout the memo and she said it was ok\n"},{"text":"I felt like I was being a creep\n"},{"embeddedObjects":[{"type":"horizontalRuleLine"}]},{"text":"thank god, laini just has rizz on rizz, but a receding hairline and uncombed hair\n"},{"text":"Thank Jesus\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"Im stressed\n"},{"embeddedObjects":[{"type":"horizontalRuleLine"}]},{"text":"Got home ,big poop but I\u0027m in bed so ...\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"Also I think fil and I had that final call over WhatsApp \u0026 I said I\u0027m not for it, I don\u0027t want to go forward.\n"},{"text":"I think that is the end of the road for us."}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":456},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2024-03-28T06:30:31Z
- modifiedDate 2024-04-04T19:41:31Z
- creationDevice 23129RAA4G
- creationOSName Android
- creationOSVersion 13
- creationDeviceType Xiaomi
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid 3BB48FCA61B84066A3D7BC86777972C1
- starred false
- pinned false
- text '
- ,
- .
- So
- My life is shite
- I have food, transport , home
- But I am not fulfilled
- And because I recently broke up with my boyfriend, nothing interesting is happening to me.
- So I am obsessing over laini, even knowing Ruiz has a child, Silas is married etc, all these ppl have ppl and also children, why am I being so dumb.
- I was recently a child, don't I care about my life, I need to get over this shit.
- But I hope by the end of my contract, I get a full front body contact hug from the man with the rizz himself.
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"So\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"My life is shite\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I have food, transport , home\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"But I am not fulfilled\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"And because I recently broke up with my boyfriend, nothing interesting is happening to me.\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"So I am obsessing over laini, even knowing Ruiz has a child, Silas is married etc, all these ppl have ppl and also children, why am I being so dumb.\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I was recently a child, don\u0027t I care about my life, I need to get over this shit.\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"But I hope by the end of my contract, I get a full front body contact hug from the man with the rizz himself."}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":456},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2024-03-27T10:19:42Z
- modifiedDate 2024-03-28T19:04:23Z
- creationDevice 23129RAA4G
- creationOSName Android
- creationOSVersion 13
- creationDeviceType Xiaomi
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid 6E2573364466456894887DF7517A6E5A
- starred false
- pinned false
- text '
- ,
- .
- So
- I'm taking a huge shit, it's like my poop gets shy at home and wants me to poop only at work
- I ate chips for brekkie
- And drove ok, I need to ask for gas
- And my hair feels nice and clean
- I also called Jackline DSM, for the pan, Stu didn't pick, I'm gonna look for her again
- That was clearly a clean your guts out poop
- ***
- The day is so long and complicated already
- Pauline calling all the way
- But I got in touch with the pan lady
- Also appears ruiz has a 6 month old child 👀
- ***
- I feel like shine, after a day like today, Lord knows why I don't want to be here
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"So\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I\u0027m taking a huge shit, it\u0027s like my poop gets shy at home and wants me to poop only at work\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I ate chips for brekkie\n"},{"text":"And drove ok, I need to ask for gas\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"And my hair feels nice and clean\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I also called Jackline DSM, for the pan, Stu didn\u0027t pick, I\u0027m gonna look for her again\n"},{"text":"That was clearly a clean your guts out poop\n"},{"embeddedObjects":[{"type":"horizontalRuleLine"}]},{"text":"The day is so long and complicated already\n"},{"text":"Pauline calling all the way\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"But I got in touch with the pan lady\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"Also appears ruiz has a 6 month old child 👀\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"embeddedObjects":[{"type":"horizontalRuleLine"}]},{"text":"I feel like shine, after a day like today, Lord knows why I don\u0027t want to be here"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":456},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2024-03-26T05:59:34Z
- modifiedDate 2024-03-26T11:25:43Z
- creationDevice 23129RAA4G
- creationOSName Android
- creationOSVersion 13
- creationDeviceType Xiaomi
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid CBC60785AAB04E7DA3AD9431337D4078
- starred false
- pinned false
- text '
- ,
- .
- I'm sending this one out
- I'm not willing to work on it
- I did not want to tell you when you did something that pissed me off because I did not want for us to have a problem in our relationship.I felt as though it would be easier to ignore it and hope it went away rather than talking about it and I apologize for that.
- But ( I'm sorry if this sounds like I'm blaming you)
- I also feel like I met you with your standard behaviour and you met me with mine, and it is difficult to change, it's already one of your traits and I don't want to be pointing out things to change. It is also difficult for me, I feel attacked when someone tells me to change.
- Lastly , I need to stand up for myself. I apologise for not informing you of all this but I need to be honest
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I\u0027m sending this one out\n"},{"text":"I\u0027m not willing to work on it\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I did not want to tell you when you did something that pissed me off because I did not want for us to have a problem in our relationship.I felt as though it would be easier to ignore it and hope it went away rather than talking about it and I apologize for that.\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"But ( I\u0027m sorry if this sounds like I\u0027m blaming you)\n"},{"text":"I also feel like I met you with your standard behaviour and you met me with mine, and it is difficult to change, it\u0027s already one of your traits and I don\u0027t want to be pointing out things to change. It is also difficult for me, I feel attacked when someone tells me to change.\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"Lastly , I need to stand up for myself. I apologise for not informing you of all this but I need to be honest"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":456},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2024-03-25T20:01:33Z
- modifiedDate 2024-03-28T18:55:45Z
- creationDevice 23129RAA4G
- creationOSName Android
- creationOSVersion 13
- creationDeviceType Xiaomi
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid 6995F4F4E42241698595723312D0BDBA
- starred false
- pinned false
- text '
- ,
- .
- So
- I met with Phil for the last time today
- I put my 7700 into mshwari again for 12 months
- The day I see him, he's dressed to kill, Jean jacket, black everything
- Nice watch, nice phone, looking rich
- I don't owe him any money
- He gave a very nice departing speech.
- I said I wish we'd met at a different time,
- He had a very nice quote, it escapes my mind
- .
- But he looked nice, he spoke well, nice memories
- He said he lost all our memories, no pics, no texts, no chats...
- I like that, it isn't a good thing but I like it
- ***
- He actually left, we said our goodbyes
- He held my hand, he was very sweet.
- Then he actually left. I don't believe it
- He didn't even finish his drink, that he paid for, he paid for both our drinks
- The hand holding was a mistake, I almost teared
- up
- He called me for another hug, and told me to think about it, I actually teared up huge mistake
- Then I gave him a hug and walked away.
- I MADE THE RIGHT CHOICE.
- and he gave me the phone pin and his earphones
- ***
- there's a man walking around selling socks and I'm parked in that same spot where a young girl my age was selling njugu and knocked on the car window
- I am privileged that I have other things to think about such that my mind is freed up to think of money, food and boys
- ***
- > what phil said was that imagine you have a relationship with your parents or your sister and you have a problem that comes up, if you don't bring up the issue and try to solve it ,each time you are the only one getting hurt, each time you interact with them you are the only one getting hurt because they do not know your problem . You'd rather bring it up and try to solve it so that you can continue
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"So\n"},{"text":"I met with Phil for the last time today\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I put my 7700 into mshwari again for 12 months\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"The day I see him, he\u0027s dressed to kill, Jean jacket, black everything\n"},{"text":"Nice watch, nice phone, looking rich\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I don\u0027t owe him any money\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"He gave a very nice departing speech.\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I said I wish we\u0027d met at a different time,\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"He had a very nice quote, it escapes my mind\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"But he looked nice, he spoke well, nice memories\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"He said he lost all our memories, no pics, no texts, no chats...\n"},{"text":"I like that, it isn\u0027t a good thing but I like it\n"},{"embeddedObjects":[{"type":"horizontalRuleLine"}]},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"He actually left, we said our goodbyes\n"},{"text":"He held my hand, he was very sweet.\n"},{"text":"Then he actually left. I don\u0027t believe it\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"He didn\u0027t even finish his drink, that he paid for, he paid for both our drinks\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"The hand holding was a mistake, I almost teared\n"},{"text":"up\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"He called me for another hug, and told me to think about it, I actually teared up huge mistake\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"Then I gave him a hug and walked away.\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I MADE THE RIGHT CHOICE.\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"and he gave me the phone pin and his earphones\n"},{"embeddedObjects":[{"type":"horizontalRuleLine"}]},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"there\u0027s a man walking around selling socks and I\u0027m parked in that same spot where a young girl my age was selling njugu and knocked on the car window\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I am privileged that I have other things to think about such that my mind is freed up to think of money, food and boys\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"embeddedObjects":[{"type":"horizontalRuleLine"}]},{"attributes":{"line":{"indentLevel":1,"quote":true}},"text":"what phil said was that imagine you have a relationship with your parents or your sister and you have a problem that comes up, if you don\u0027t bring up the issue and try to solve it ,each time you are the only one getting hurt, each time you interact with them you are the only one getting hurt because they do not know your problem . You\u0027d rather bring it up and try to solve it so that you can continue"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":456},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2024-03-25T15:38:09Z
- modifiedDate 2024-04-04T19:56:04Z
- creationDevice 23129RAA4G
- creationOSName Android
- creationOSVersion 13
- creationDeviceType Xiaomi
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid 20BB3D9D812346028B72ECEAD42837D6
- starred false
- pinned false
- text '
- ,
- .
- ```
- So
- I took a pooop
- pebbly
- I'd gone in there's stank strongly of poop, sb had just left.
- Waited a bit, wandered around
- Went back in, flushed
- Sat down, pooped, in stank in seconds after idb pinched out the last pebble, peed then final push
- Flushed even before wiping.
- ```
- There was a meeting, upstairs today,
- So they catered food, so there was lunch on top of my lunch, on top of lunch I'd already ordered
- There were several potato slices, a large hunk of greasy chicken, few rice with veg, bitter overdone sukuma , fish fillets
- And meat of which I took soup, so I'm pretty full
- And if I want to complain about lunch I should make/prep my own so that I can't complain.
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"attributes":{"line":{"codeBlock":true}},"text":"So\n"},{"attributes":{"line":{"codeBlock":true}},"text":"I took a pooop\n"},{"attributes":{"line":{"codeBlock":true}},"text":"pebbly\n\n"},{"attributes":{"line":{"codeBlock":true}},"text":"I\u0027d gone in there\u0027s stank strongly of poop, sb had just left.\n\n\n"},{"attributes":{"line":{"codeBlock":true}},"text":"Waited a bit, wandered around\n\n\n"},{"attributes":{"line":{"codeBlock":true}},"text":"Went back in, flushed\n\n"},{"attributes":{"line":{"codeBlock":true}},"text":"Sat down, pooped, in stank in seconds after idb pinched out the last pebble, peed then final push\n"},{"attributes":{"line":{"codeBlock":true}},"text":"Flushed even before wiping.\n"},{"text":"There was a meeting, upstairs today,\n"},{"text":"So they catered food, so there was lunch on top of my lunch, on top of lunch I\u0027d already ordered\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"There were several potato slices, a large hunk of greasy chicken, few rice with veg, bitter overdone sukuma , fish fillets\n"},{"text":"And meat of which I took soup, so I\u0027m pretty full\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"And if I want to complain about lunch I should make/prep my own so that I can\u0027t complain."}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":456},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2024-03-25T13:48:57Z
- modifiedDate 2024-03-25T20:08:40Z
- creationDevice 23129RAA4G
- creationOSName Android
- creationOSVersion 13
- creationDeviceType Xiaomi
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid 7C56536A33B245F3900A3D7A4DC38453
- starred false
- pinned false
- text '
- ,
- .
- So
- Phil texted me today
- JC Phil
- How are you, how have you been doing
- Not well
- I think about you every day
- I hope you're okay
- I'm lonely and I wonder if I wold be better off with someone, you or alone by myself
- I'm so lonely
- What are you up to, I've been contemplating reaching out but I wanted to go the no contact route. Are you ok
- ***
- I'm trying because I'm so sad
- I have no friends to talk to.
- I'm so furking alone
- I don't make any efforts to make friends, so I'm alone. And even knowing that I'm using Phil as a crutch, isnt stopping me from using him as a crutch
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"So\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"Phil texted me today\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"JC Phil\n"},{"text":"How are you, how have you been doing\n"},{"text":"Not well\n"},{"text":"I think about you every day\n"},{"text":"I hope you\u0027re okay\n"},{"text":"I\u0027m lonely and I wonder if I wold be better off with someone, you or alone by myself\n"},{"text":"I\u0027m so lonely\n"},{"text":"What are you up to, I\u0027ve been contemplating reaching out but I wanted to go the no contact route. Are you ok\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"embeddedObjects":[{"type":"horizontalRuleLine"}]},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I\u0027m trying because I\u0027m so sad\n"},{"text":"I have no friends to talk to.\n"},{"text":"I\u0027m so furking alone\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I don\u0027t make any efforts to make friends, so I\u0027m alone. And even knowing that I\u0027m using Phil as a crutch, isnt stopping me from using him as a crutch\n"},{"text":"\n"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":456},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2024-03-24T08:25:31Z
- modifiedDate 2024-03-25T20:08:42Z
- creationDevice 23129RAA4G
- creationOSName Android
- creationOSVersion 13
- creationDeviceType Xiaomi
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid 3A6F88419530400787DEDCB43E365109
- starred false
- pinned false
- text '
- ,
- .
- So
- I miss him, and I don't feel as happy
- And somewhat guilty that sb may like me in that kind of way
- But I think we're doing great not talking to each other
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"So\n"},{"text":"I miss him, and I don\u0027t feel as happy\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"And somewhat guilty that sb may like me in that kind of way\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"But I think we\u0027re doing great not talking to each other"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":456},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2024-03-22T19:29:13Z
- modifiedDate 2024-04-04T19:51:16Z
- creationDevice 23129RAA4G
- creationOSName Android
- creationOSVersion 13
- creationDeviceType Xiaomi
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid A628600E7AE74E61A2D5A51D09E20CB5
- starred false
- pinned false
- text '
- ,
- .
- So
- I've had really tasty githeri for lunch.
- And I want to buy bread and cake
- I miss him but I also don't want any of his mannerisms around me.
- So I wish idk for what.
- ***
- I saw job lewis on a date today
- When I initially saw him in naivas I hid my face because My locs were exposed
- Then I spent time scanning the crowds for him
- Because I realised I have never seen anyone and I would like To say hi
- Finally on a pretext to go to the bathroom while scanning The movie section , I saw him
- He actually turned out to be on the ground floor In Java but I recognised the back of his head and he's slightly pink shirt ,he was sitting with a very pretty brown girl with lots of hair He was on a date
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"So\n"},{"text":"I\u0027ve had really tasty githeri for lunch.\n"},{"text":"And I want to buy bread and cake\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I miss him but I also don\u0027t want any of his mannerisms around me.\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"So I wish idk for what.\n"},{"embeddedObjects":[{"type":"horizontalRuleLine"}]},{"text":"I saw job lewis on a date today\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"When I initially saw him in naivas I hid my face because My locs were exposed\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"Then I spent time scanning the crowds for him\n"},{"text":"Because I realised I have never seen anyone and I would like To say hi\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"Finally on a pretext to go to the bathroom while scanning The movie section , I saw him\n"},{"text":"He actually turned out to be on the ground floor In Java but I recognised the back of his head and he\u0027s slightly pink shirt ,he was sitting with a very pretty brown girl with lots of hair He was on a date\n"},{"text":"\n"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":456},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2024-03-21T12:25:34Z
- modifiedDate 2024-03-21T15:31:11Z
- creationDevice 23129RAA4G
- creationOSName Android
- creationOSVersion 13
- creationDeviceType Xiaomi
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid 0AA04D95275D46E1AF94F744B6A63C57
- starred false
- pinned false
- text '
- ,
- .
- So
- I was rejected for the bsk global position
- Feel shit,
- Also told \~ the person who's office I'm in,about a client, she reacted very badly. If I don't know any info, I will forward them to you. Getting paid
- ***
- I've told my mother about bsk and about not extending with nck
- ***
- And I had the horrible thought of reaching out to the person who broke up with me. For attention
- Just for someone to baby me
- But I held off
- Also zyrtuc cost 100 Bob per tab
- So 500 for 5 tablets
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"So\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I was rejected for the bsk global position\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"Feel shit,\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"Also told ~ the person who\u0027s office I\u0027m in,about a client, she reacted very badly. If I don\u0027t know any info, I will forward them to you. Getting paid\n"},{"embeddedObjects":[{"type":"horizontalRuleLine"}]},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I\u0027ve told my mother about bsk and about not extending with nck\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"embeddedObjects":[{"type":"horizontalRuleLine"}]},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"And I had the horrible thought of reaching out to the person who broke up with me. For attention\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"Just for someone to baby me\n"},{"text":"But I held off\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"Also zyrtuc cost 100 Bob per tab\n"},{"text":"So 500 for 5 tablets\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":456},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2024-03-20T11:53:14Z
- modifiedDate 2024-04-04T19:57:41Z
- creationDevice 23129RAA4G
- creationOSName Android
- creationOSVersion 13
- creationDeviceType Xiaomi
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid F170C04F95A943129865AF500AAF4647
- starred false
- pinned false
- text # This as a reminder
- '
- ,
- .
- Fuck him for not respecting my boundaries
- I don't like when he wears an ugly shirt
- I'm disillusioned with the drinks
- I want him to wear a vest
- I don't want to buy gifts
- I don't trust him
- I don't want to check his messages
- I don't feel like he respects women
- I don't think he likes women
- I don't want to be pressured for sex; if I'm not able, I'm not
- Fuck him for guilt tripping
- richText {"contents":[{"attributes":{"line":{"header":1}},"text":"This as a reminder\n"},{"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"Fuck him for not respecting my boundaries\n"},{"text":"I don\u0027t like when he wears an ugly shirt\n"},{"text":"I\u0027m disillusioned with the drinks\n"},{"text":"I want him to wear a vest\n"},{"text":"I don\u0027t want to buy gifts\n"},{"text":"I don\u0027t trust him\n"},{"text":"I don\u0027t want to check his messages\n"},{"text":"I don\u0027t feel like he respects women\n"},{"text":"I don\u0027t think he likes women\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I don\u0027t want to be pressured for sex; if I\u0027m not able, I\u0027m not\n"},{"text":"Fuck him for guilt tripping"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":456},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2024-03-19T08:10:20Z
- modifiedDate 2024-03-25T15:38:05Z
- creationDevice 23129RAA4G
- creationOSName Android
- creationOSVersion 13
- creationDeviceType Xiaomi
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid 280DDF43A55743819B5075ADB21AEA5F
- starred false
- pinned false
- text '
- ,
- .
- So
- Human acknowledgement makes me feel emotions
- ***
- ```
- I have your hoodie, I wanted to give it back personally and also get the spare key back.I need to talk to you in that process and handle it modestly.
- ```
- ***
- This final death knell
- I clearly want something to hold. Why else am I dragging this out longer than it needs to be
- I'm of the opinion that I shouldn't place or pick any calls
- and the minute he's back, hand over his stuff
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"So\n"},{"text":"Human acknowledgement makes me feel emotions\n"},{"embeddedObjects":[{"type":"horizontalRuleLine"}]},{"attributes":{"line":{"codeBlock":true}},"text":"I have your hoodie, I wanted to give it back personally and also get the spare key back.I need to talk to you in that process and handle it modestly.\n\n"},{"embeddedObjects":[{"type":"horizontalRuleLine"}]},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"This final death knell\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I clearly want something to hold. Why else am I dragging this out longer than it needs to be\n"},{"text":"I\u0027m of the opinion that I shouldn\u0027t place or pick any calls\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"and the minute he\u0027s back, hand over his stuff"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":456},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2024-03-19T05:07:22Z
- modifiedDate 2024-04-04T19:59:27Z
- creationDevice 23129RAA4G
- creationOSName Android
- creationOSVersion 13
- creationDeviceType Xiaomi
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid 6DAC2B8DA5EB480CB47FABB56DFA71C3
- starred false
- pinned false
- text '
- ,
- .
- So I got broken up with today
- I miss those good good attentions
- Bet it will only get better with time
- ,,,,
- He deleted his telegram acct
- Or he blocked me, either way
- It's only whats app then phone call then we're done
- ***
- I've eaten pineapple and I feel alive
- Nice lunch
- Of githeri and mboga
- I feel so much better, but the attention train is
- Over
- I have no one to tell that it's almost 5pm
- and how the workday is over
- Blew a huge leaky snot blob, yucks
- And refrain from buying anything this week, save money plus the spending high is short lasting, too much so to make you feel better
- Is it that I still want him to be kind to me, and think of me as a Good person
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"So I got broken up with today\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I miss those good good attentions\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"Bet it will only get better with time\n"},{"text":",,,,\n"},{"text":"He deleted his telegram acct\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"Or he blocked me, either way\n"},{"text":"It\u0027s only whats app then phone call then we\u0027re done\n"},{"embeddedObjects":[{"type":"horizontalRuleLine"}]},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I\u0027ve eaten pineapple and I feel alive\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"Nice lunch\n"},{"text":"Of githeri and mboga\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I feel so much better, but the attention train is\n"},{"text":"Over\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I have no one to tell that it\u0027s almost 5pm\n"},{"text":"and how the workday is over\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"Blew a huge leaky snot blob, yucks\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"And refrain from buying anything this week, save money plus the spending high is short lasting, too much so to make you feel better\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"Is it that I still want him to be kind to me, and think of me as a Good person"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":456},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2024-03-18T05:45:56Z
- modifiedDate 2024-04-04T19:59:59Z
- creationDevice 23129RAA4G
- creationOSName Android
- creationOSVersion 13
- creationDeviceType Xiaomi
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid 692CD5721AA24420A728564BE166653B
- starred false
- pinned false
- text '
- ,
- .
- Still up in the air right
- But I feel like I made a bad decision to date this guy. Fr
- I don't want anyone to know I'm dating him, I feel like I made a mistake, I clearly don't know how to choose.
- I don't wanna be a girlfriend to someone who so clearly disrespects me
- The girls, the pics, the snap accounts with just phone numbers. I'm ashamed to be in a relationship like this.
- I feel bad
- And so I'm gonna untangle myself one at a time.
- ***
- The vileness bro
- You literally called me to pick a fight
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"Still up in the air right\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"But I feel like I made a bad decision to date this guy. Fr\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I don\u0027t want anyone to know I\u0027m dating him, I feel like I made a mistake, I clearly don\u0027t know how to choose.\n"},{"text":"I don\u0027t wanna be a girlfriend to someone who so clearly disrespects me\n"},{"text":"The girls, the pics, the snap accounts with just phone numbers. I\u0027m ashamed to be in a relationship like this.\n"},{"text":"I feel bad\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"And so I\u0027m gonna untangle myself one at a time.\n"},{"embeddedObjects":[{"type":"horizontalRuleLine"}]},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"The vileness bro\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"You literally called me to pick a fight\n"},{"text":"\n"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":456},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2024-03-17T09:56:37Z
- modifiedDate 2024-04-04T20:00:37Z
- creationDevice 23129RAA4G
- creationOSName Android
- creationOSVersion 13
- creationDeviceType Xiaomi
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid 0E57BFBFE50A44CDBA1456F4C3338572
- starred false
- pinned false
- text '
- ,
- .
- Just like that, I no longer have a boyfriend
- I was wishing it weren't true but, it is
- Some time ago, I was feeling like I'd like not to be doing this
- Then I got sick, and I thought I'd really like some support
- But I'm a sucker sad if I listen, I'll be drawn in again
- I gotta start the blocka
- Snap, insta, mail. I'm sad, but also kind of relieved
- FaceTime, iMessage block on there too
- ## Jesus
- Just like that, I no longer have a boyfriend
- I won't be pressured anymore. I also won't have anyone to talk to and tell about my day.
- I don't owe him any money, we haven't gone out for a while
- I should have been more proactive about removing my pics from his phone
- This all feels like a fever dream
- ***
- I won't text him today tho. I wanna have a boyfriend for two more days.then if I don't see him on monday evening , i'll tell him then and blo'ck him on the last apps, phone number, messages and whats up
- Fuck bro. Just like that
- ***
- The boy got a pixel Soo nice
- He worked hard for it
- It'll be great, he can really look at girls coochies in 4K
- I have a boyfriend for 2 more days tho.
- And when I was like please let's talk about the boundaries I have against touching
- He was against it
- Now he's like, you wanna talk
- You wanna talk ?
- I've deleted all my social media, I'm Soo bored
- ```
- [15/03, 8:48 pm] Phil: I'm so sorry babe for how you are feeling, that sucks for sure. I hope you feel better
- [16/03, 8:35 am] Phil: Hey, sorry about yesterday night, I had the guy who I was handing over the car to bring me back home and he'd put me in that position, I called you intentionally just to part ways with him, am so sorry.
- ```
- His response
- Worry about your other girlfriends on snap
- don't think about my snap, there's other women sending you cooch pics ,worry about themi gotta worry about me
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"Just like that, I no longer have a boyfriend\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I was wishing it weren\u0027t true but, it is\n"},{"text":"Some time ago, I was feeling like I\u0027d like not to be doing this\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"Then I got sick, and I thought I\u0027d really like some support\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"But I\u0027m a sucker sad if I listen, I\u0027ll be drawn in again\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I gotta start the blocka\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"Snap, insta, mail. I\u0027m sad, but also kind of relieved\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"FaceTime, iMessage block on there too\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"attributes":{"line":{"header":2}},"text":"Jesus\n"},{"text":"Just like that, I no longer have a boyfriend\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I won\u0027t be pressured anymore. I also won\u0027t have anyone to talk to and tell about my day.\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I don\u0027t owe him any money, we haven\u0027t gone out for a while\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I should have been more proactive about removing my pics from his phone\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"This all feels like a fever dream\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"embeddedObjects":[{"type":"horizontalRuleLine"}]},{"text":"I won\u0027t text him today tho. I wanna have a boyfriend for two more days.then if I don\u0027t see him on monday evening , i\u0027ll tell him then and blo\u0027ck him on the last apps, phone number, messages and whats up\n"},{"text":"Fuck bro. Just like that\n"},{"embeddedObjects":[{"type":"horizontalRuleLine"}]},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"The boy got a pixel Soo nice\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"He worked hard for it\n"},{"text":"It\u0027ll be great, he can really look at girls coochies in 4K\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I have a boyfriend for 2 more days tho.\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"And when I was like please let\u0027s talk about the boundaries I have against touching\n"},{"text":"He was against it\n"},{"text":"Now he\u0027s like, you wanna talk\n"},{"text":"You wanna talk ?\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I\u0027ve deleted all my social media, I\u0027m Soo bored\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"attributes":{"line":{"codeBlock":true}},"text":"[15/03, 8:48 pm] Phil: I\u0027m so sorry babe for how you are feeling, that sucks for sure. I hope you feel better\n\n"},{"attributes":{"line":{"codeBlock":true}},"text":"[16/03, 8:35 am] Phil: Hey, sorry about yesterday night, I had the guy who I was handing over the car to bring me back home and he\u0027d put me in that position, I called you intentionally just to part ways with him, am so sorry.\n"},{"text":"His response\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"Worry about your other girlfriends on snap\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"don\u0027t think about my snap, there\u0027s other women sending you cooch pics ,worry about themi gotta worry about me"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":456},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2024-03-15T21:12:28Z
- modifiedDate 2024-04-04T20:01:38Z
- creationDevice 23129RAA4G
- creationOSName Android
- creationOSVersion 13
- creationDeviceType Xiaomi
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid 5EB320A082E24FC4B99EAB9DC3960F63
- starred false
- pinned false
- text '
- ,
- .
- I'm so mad, I'm sick
- I feel so bad
- I feel so sad, I'm sick, I'm in pain, my chest hurts, I can't breathe well, it's a minor thing but it's really getting me down
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"I\u0027m so mad, I\u0027m sick\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I feel so bad\n"},{"text":"I feel so sad, I\u0027m sick, I\u0027m in pain, my chest hurts, I can\u0027t breathe well, it\u0027s a minor thing but it\u0027s really getting me down"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":456},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2024-03-14T13:41:12Z
- modifiedDate 2024-04-04T20:03:45Z
- creationDevice 23129RAA4G
- creationOSName Android
- creationOSVersion 13
- creationDeviceType Xiaomi
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid 48FD58A36C9643B69FE3C8952E500048
- starred false
- pinned false
- text # '
- # ,
- # .
- # Morning
- Of the day
- I stress pooping
- ***
- I got there, quite post, in a rush, left all my documents in the car
- I'm feeling confident the
- ***
- I'm a tiny bit nervous,
- ***
- It was an SQL, Linux, windows server test
- Completely unprepared
- ***
- Also, I'm fucking bleeding, out of my vagina
- It just so happened to got on my white panties
- And I proceeded to do sth dumb and try to clean them
- Ended up wet
- ***
- Spent some cash at naivas, feel bad.
- 594, I keep ignoring it, knowing full well, if I don't count it , it's gonna be a shock to me when I have no money
- We need to agree, nugget ; we don't need to agree on shit
- richText {"contents":[{"attributes":{"line":{"header":1}},"text":"\u0027\n"},{"attributes":{"line":{"header":1}},"text":",\n"},{"attributes":{"line":{"header":1}},"text":".\n"},{"attributes":{"line":{"header":1}},"text":"Morning\n"},{"text":"Of the day\n"},{"text":"I stress pooping\n"},{"embeddedObjects":[{"type":"horizontalRuleLine"}]},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I got there, quite post, in a rush, left all my documents in the car\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I\u0027m feeling confident the\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"embeddedObjects":[{"type":"horizontalRuleLine"}]},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I\u0027m a tiny bit nervous,\n"},{"embeddedObjects":[{"type":"horizontalRuleLine"}]},{"text":"It was an SQL, Linux, windows server test\n"},{"text":"Completely unprepared\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"embeddedObjects":[{"type":"horizontalRuleLine"}]},{"text":"Also, I\u0027m fucking bleeding, out of my vagina\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"It just so happened to got on my white panties\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"And I proceeded to do sth dumb and try to clean them\n"},{"text":"Ended up wet\n"},{"embeddedObjects":[{"type":"horizontalRuleLine"}]},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"Spent some cash at naivas, feel bad.\n"},{"text":"594, I keep ignoring it, knowing full well, if I don\u0027t count it , it\u0027s gonna be a shock to me when I have no money\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"We need to agree, nugget ; we don\u0027t need to agree on shit"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":455},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2024-03-13T04:10:08Z
- modifiedDate 2024-03-13T15:11:29Z
- creationDevice 23129RAA4G
- creationOSName Android
- creationOSVersion 13
- creationDeviceType Xiaomi
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid 2196F2DC624F4A0A96A1EE01F6CF4B05
- starred false
- pinned false
- text '
- ,
- .
- I'm actually really pissed, after speeding home
- I got here, nobody.
- I call, 10 fucking times, nothing
- I hoot, nothing
- I finally get help when Alice opens the door as she's leaving
- I feel insane
- ***
- I talked to Felister for a bit
- Disheartening but true
- ***
- And my boyfriend's offline
- His phone's damaged
- I feel quite alone today, definitely a bit abandoned
- I actually want to cry
- I talked to Phil, it felt off, I felt rushed.
- I have no personal relationships
- At 1 am, I just had that sweat all over the place thing i hav
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"I\u0027m actually really pissed, after speeding home\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I got here, nobody.\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I call, 10 fucking times, nothing\n"},{"text":"I hoot, nothing\n"},{"text":"I finally get help when Alice opens the door as she\u0027s leaving\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I feel insane\n"},{"embeddedObjects":[{"type":"horizontalRuleLine"}]},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I talked to Felister for a bit\n"},{"text":"Disheartening but true\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"embeddedObjects":[{"type":"horizontalRuleLine"}]},{"text":"And my boyfriend\u0027s offline\n"},{"text":"His phone\u0027s damaged\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I feel quite alone today, definitely a bit abandoned\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I actually want to cry\n"},{"text":"I talked to Phil, it felt off, I felt rushed.\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I have no personal relationships\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"At 1 am, I just had that sweat all over the place thing i hav"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":456},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2024-03-12T15:48:36Z
- modifiedDate 2024-04-04T20:04:18Z
- creationDevice 23129RAA4G
- creationOSName Android
- creationOSVersion 13
- creationDeviceType Xiaomi
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid C5C759CD70BA4E4BA880F51203AB096C
- starred false
- pinned false
- text '
- ,
- .
- Isn't she lovely, , isn't she wonderful.
- Home, speaking to the boy
- Told my dad, Braison heard. Feel bad
- They wished me good,so ok
- My hair looks good, feels good, I'm so glad
- I just went insurance paid for ketoconazole
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"Isn\u0027t she lovely, , isn\u0027t she wonderful.\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"Home, speaking to the boy\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"Told my dad, Braison heard. Feel bad\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"They wished me good,so ok\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"My hair looks good, feels good, I\u0027m so glad\n"},{"text":"I just went insurance paid for ketoconazole"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":456},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2024-03-11T18:59:32Z
- modifiedDate 2024-04-04T20:04:47Z
- creationDevice 23129RAA4G
- creationOSName Android
- creationOSVersion 13
- creationDeviceType Xiaomi
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid 49CB1ABB93B94AB790F2CA83915D9E20
- starred false
- pinned false
- text '
- ,
- .
- If you don't wanna talk , we don't gotta talk.
- I'm tired , I wanna gen into bed and have a nice hot cold long sleep
- Sometimes I feel bad
- I'm pretty sad, who will i tell I'm going to shower when I'm alone
- When A tree falls, in the forest and no one hears it, did it make a sound
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"If you don\u0027t wanna talk , we don\u0027t gotta talk.\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I\u0027m tired , I wanna gen into bed and have a nice hot cold long sleep\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"Sometimes I feel bad\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I\u0027m pretty sad, who will i tell I\u0027m going to shower when I\u0027m alone\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"When A tree falls, in the forest and no one hears it, did it make a sound\n"},{"text":"\n"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":456},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2024-03-09T20:32:34Z
- modifiedDate 2024-04-04T20:04:59Z
- creationDevice 23129RAA4G
- creationOSName Android
- creationOSVersion 13
- creationDeviceType Xiaomi
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid 65FE93CAA7A34DF9A05F742003AF05DF
- starred false
- pinned false
- text '
- ,
- .
- At the dentist at park place
- This was A mistake. Nrb hospital
- No more
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"At the dentist at park place\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"This was A mistake. Nrb hospital\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"No more"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":456},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2024-03-08T08:54:35Z
- modifiedDate 2024-04-04T20:05:12Z
- creationDevice 23129RAA4G
- creationOSName Android
- creationOSVersion 13
- creationDeviceType Xiaomi
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid E78A00C934484FDA849AD3B07488BF67
- starred false
- pinned false
- text '
- ,
- .
- I feel to.eless knowing that Sandra is still in his life
- I think we should break up this year
- I was weak last time, I'll still be weak but it's gonna be done
- I gotta do it
- He's gonna break up w me this yr
- Around June, may , July ; no later than aug
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"I feel to.eless knowing that Sandra is still in his life\n"},{"text":"I think we should break up this year\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I was weak last time, I\u0027ll still be weak but it\u0027s gonna be done\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I gotta do it\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"He\u0027s gonna break up w me this yr\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"Around June, may , July ; no later than aug"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":456},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2024-03-07T11:57:01Z
- modifiedDate 2024-04-04T20:05:16Z
- creationDevice 23129RAA4G
- creationOSName Android
- creationOSVersion 13
- creationDeviceType Xiaomi
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid 18552225046F4FE9BD155336D8561BCC
- starred false
- pinned false
- text # I
- am in town and I wanna take a fat
- shit
- Plus I'm super bloated
- Crisps, tomato sauce, 2 pastes and chocoband if I can afford it
- richText {"contents":[{"attributes":{"line":{"header":1}},"text":"I\n"},{"text":"am in town and I wanna take a fat\n"},{"text":"shit\n"},{"text":"Plus I\u0027m super bloated\n"},{"text":"Crisps, tomato sauce, 2 pastes and chocoband if I can afford it"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":456},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2024-03-06T15:33:37Z
- modifiedDate 2024-04-04T20:05:42Z
- creationDevice 23129RAA4G
- creationOSName Android
- creationOSVersion 13
- creationDeviceType Xiaomi
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid 871D6ACCE69B42EB8DE35B1CACE1790E
- starred false
- pinned false
- text '
- ,
- .
- I got to see Phil today
- For all of 20 minutes
- He was a bit cold and held off from me but I've been off before so no biggie
- He didn't put down his bag,
- He was like, let's talk abt Monday, I was like ok, I had actually mostly forgot about it
- And I felt like he deliberately misunderstood me
- I stated my two points
- 1. And you already know I don't like public displays of affection. It feels like a dis**play.**And I'm not against all affection, and it's not that I want to see you less. Buuut don't kiss me aggressively.
- 2. I don't like when you get insistent with the affection. And go overboard
- And then he responded by saying
- He only sees me for a few days out of the week ( *and the goblin in my head, said who's fault is that*) and for a few hours in those days
- Which is true but I felt the same you don't spend nearly enough time with me and fulfil my needs for you to be complaining
- And if I refuse to hold his hand, which really makes him happy
- Hugs, pecks and handholding are affection
- I don't disagree with all of the above Phil but fuck, when you reach into my pants and squeeze my butt , when I'm lying across your lap and you squeeze my boob quite hard, when we're sitting side by side and you slide your hand between my thighs then ask me if you're touching my coochie and if I'm wet;**;; I really don't want to believe that you**don't think that I'm uncomfortable. When you start off with pecks and I swallow my discomfort because we're parked in a street and ppl are walking by but I don't want you to feel bad. Then the pecks get rough and you start insisting on a kiss, then you start grabbing my shit, I'm a person
- You fucking choked me bro, as I laid across your lap, to kiss my neck
- How on earth are you unaware that I'm uncomfortable
- I struggle to reconcile the phil who really respects me and the Phil who did that shit
- And honestly, it's fucking unacceptable
- And he was finally like I really respect that, which made me realise that I cannot trust his respect
- When he said he respected me in bed too, fuck that
- I hope you continue finding it hard to wrap your head around it. Because furking hell
- ***
- Lastly, if me being unavailable to you is so hard, please got another girl. I'm closer and closer to the edge, you're free to leave, you have the right
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I got to see Phil today\n"},{"text":"For all of 20 minutes\n"},{"text":"He was a bit cold and held off from me but I\u0027ve been off before so no biggie\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"He didn\u0027t put down his bag,\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"He was like, let\u0027s talk abt Monday, I was like ok, I had actually mostly forgot about it\n"},{"text":"And I felt like he deliberately misunderstood me\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I stated my two points\n"},{"attributes":{"line":{"checked":false,"header":0,"indentLevel":1,"listStyle":"numbered"}},"text":"And you already know I don\u0027t like public displays of affection. It feels like a dis"},{"attributes":{"bold":true,"line":{"checked":false,"header":0,"indentLevel":1,"listStyle":"numbered"}},"text":"play. "},{"attributes":{"line":{"checked":false,"header":0,"indentLevel":1,"listStyle":"numbered"}},"text":"And I\u0027m not against all affection, and it\u0027s not that I want to see you less. Buuut don\u0027t kiss me aggressively.\n"},{"attributes":{"line":{"checked":false,"header":0,"indentLevel":1,"listStyle":"numbered"}},"text":"I don\u0027t like when you get insistent with the affection. And go overboard\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"And then he responded by saying\n"},{"text":"He only sees me for a few days out of the week ( "},{"attributes":{"italic":true},"text":"and the goblin in my head, said who\u0027s fault is that"},{"text":") and for a few hours in those days\n"},{"text":"Which is true but I felt the same you don\u0027t spend nearly enough time with me and fulfil my needs for you to be complaining\n"},{"text":"And if I refuse to hold his hand, which really makes him happy\n"},{"text":"Hugs, pecks and handholding are affection\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I don\u0027t disagree with all of the above Phil but fuck, when you reach into my pants and squeeze my butt , when I\u0027m lying across your lap and you squeeze my boob quite hard, when we\u0027re sitting side by side and you slide your hand between my thighs then ask me if you\u0027re touching my coochie and if I\u0027m wet;"},{"attributes":{"bold":true},"text":";; I really don\u0027t want to believe that you "},{"text":"don\u0027t think that I\u0027m uncomfortable. When you start off with pecks and I swallow my discomfort because we\u0027re parked in a street and ppl are walking by but I don\u0027t want you to feel bad. Then the pecks get rough and you start insisting on a kiss, then you start grabbing my shit, I\u0027m a person\n"},{"text":"You fucking choked me bro, as I laid across your lap, to kiss my neck\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"How on earth are you unaware that I\u0027m uncomfortable\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I struggle to reconcile the phil who really respects me and the Phil who did that shit\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"And honestly, it\u0027s fucking unacceptable\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"And he was finally like I really respect that, which made me realise that I cannot trust his respect\n"},{"text":"When he said he respected me in bed too, fuck that\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I hope you continue finding it hard to wrap your head around it. Because furking hell\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"embeddedObjects":[{"type":"horizontalRuleLine"}]},{"text":"Lastly, if me being unavailable to you is so hard, please got another girl. I\u0027m closer and closer to the edge, you\u0027re free to leave, you have the right"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":455},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2024-03-06T15:03:09Z
- modifiedDate 2024-03-06T15:33:36Z
- creationDevice 23129RAA4G
- creationOSName Android
- creationOSVersion 13
- creationDeviceType Xiaomi
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid 681D93EC87734FA4A4ED638B3E8D9477
- starred false
- pinned false
- text # '
- I also have to confront something within myself
- With all the time I spend doing things I don't like
- I'm gonna end up being a person I don't want to bo
- Because my reality is not aligning with who future me wants to be or do
- richText {"contents":[{"attributes":{"line":{"header":1}},"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":"I also have to confront something within myself\n"},{"text":"With all the time I spend doing things I don\u0027t like\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I\u0027m gonna end up being a person I don\u0027t want to bo\n"},{"text":"Because my reality is not aligning with who future me wants to be or do"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":456},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2024-03-05T20:18:38Z
- modifiedDate 2024-04-04T20:19:39Z
- creationDevice 23129RAA4G
- creationOSName Android
- creationOSVersion 13
- creationDeviceType Xiaomi
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid A12ED485D90B403EB0E1E57F2DAC9248
- starred false
- pinned false
- text '
- ,
- ,
- F
- My mom finally told us she lost her job and I feel sad for her
- And for us, who'd all been leaning on her
- I need 40k for the rest of this year for my standing orders
- And I need to find a job
- She'll have so much free time
- And her and my dad also lectured us
- At the end I was told no say sth as the first born to lead
- And I said thanks for the advice
- And my dad asked if I will follow it
- And I will
- I intend to send my CV, degree etc to the group tomorrow morning
- And to shut my mouth even more
- And expect visitors on the 1st of April
- I'm actually taking it very badly that I no longer have 1 insurance to lean on
- Furk
- Fuck
- And for the rest fuck it
- I may have 5 years
- Then in 2028
- Me , my parents, my parents relatives and ppl I also like are kaput
- Also, the rest I'm not sorry for and I have no intention of doing
- It feels like a constant you haven't done enough type beat
- But I don't intend to do any of that shit
- At all babes
- I'm not
- If I can't do the things I want on Sunday, then why would I waste myself doing things for you on an Sunday
- I'm not gonna change - my mind, position on visitors
- And I still don't wanna go 2 church
- '
- ,
- .
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":"F\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"My mom finally told us she lost her job and I feel sad for her\n"},{"text":"And for us, who\u0027d all been leaning on her\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I need 40k for the rest of this year for my standing orders\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"And I need to find a job\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"She\u0027ll have so much free time\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"And her and my dad also lectured us\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"At the end I was told no say sth as the first born to lead\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"And I said thanks for the advice\n"},{"text":"And my dad asked if I will follow it\n"},{"text":"And I will\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I intend to send my CV, degree etc to the group tomorrow morning\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"And to shut my mouth even more\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"And expect visitors on the 1st of April\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I\u0027m actually taking it very badly that I no longer have 1 insurance to lean on\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"Furk\n"},{"text":"Fuck\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"And for the rest fuck it\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I may have 5 years\n"},{"text":"Then in 2028\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"Me , my parents, my parents relatives and ppl I also like are kaput\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"Also, the rest I\u0027m not sorry for and I have no intention of doing\n"},{"text":"It feels like a constant you haven\u0027t done enough type beat\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"But I don\u0027t intend to do any of that shit\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"At all babes\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I\u0027m not\n"},{"text":"If I can\u0027t do the things I want on Sunday, then why would I waste myself doing things for you on an Sunday\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I\u0027m not gonna change - my mind, position on visitors\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"And I still don\u0027t wanna go 2 church\n"},{"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":"."}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":455},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2024-03-05T20:06:55Z
- modifiedDate 2024-03-05T20:17:10Z
- creationDevice 23129RAA4G
- creationOSName Android
- creationOSVersion 13
- creationDeviceType Xiaomi
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid CFBF1CA476E647C9890984C65CE00643
- starred false
- pinned false
- text # '
- ,
- .
- Is it fair
- Idk
- I'm non happy
- I'm proposing a compromise
- We put our 2 thoughts together
- So I don't want to be, my way or the highway
- I don't want to stop being affectionate towards you
- But Christ sake
- You got mad if I don't hug you enough after you've wrestled me
- Gripped my throat
- Grabbed my boob 2 or 3 times
- Tickled me aggressively
- And pecked me
- So many kisses
- I just want no be like hey
- We're getting a little heavy, you're squeezing my butt as we sit in the front seat of my parents car with transparent windshields
- You're aggressively being affectionate and were in public
- Please tone it down
- If seeing you is not enough
- If you have a high libido and it's not worth it to tone it down
- You don't have to
- You just don't have to do it with me
- It's so hard
- I'm so furking frustrated
- Fr
- I'm so furking annoyed bro
- Am I being unreasonable
- I don't want to stop being affectionate
- I love you
- And I partly understand that you love me and want to show off your love
- But god
- It's not only about the ppl, like what will the public think
- It's also about me
- I feel uncomfortable
- Does that make you care
- You tell me I'm not with it
- I drop it
- I feel like I do a good job of that most of the time
- I say, I'm over it
- You feel bad and I feel like stating my position or feelings pushed you away
- And you're a man, you're much stronger than me , why would you be pulling and pushing me
- I'd like to not do that
- And is it about possession, I don't restrict, anything you do, in the hopes that you won't. But I feel claustrophobic
- Like I'm leaving this ( my rents ) behind to go do the same thing elsewhere
- Furk
- Why the uncomfortable questions
- Will you kiss me , while sitting at the bartender
- Come sit on my lap
- God
- Do you think, his other girlfriends did this and he expects you to do it too
- ***
- I'm holding so much anxiety it's insane, I'm double cheeked up , holding a big stone in my chest that when I talk about my feelings, ppl will me **unhappy w me**
- And leave me alone. Wataniacha
- richText {"contents":[{"attributes":{"line":{"header":1}},"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"Is it fair\n"},{"text":"Idk\n"},{"text":"I\u0027m non happy\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I\u0027m proposing a compromise\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"We put our 2 thoughts together\n"},{"text":"So I don\u0027t want to be, my way or the highway\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I don\u0027t want to stop being affectionate towards you\n"},{"text":"But Christ sake\n"},{"text":"You got mad if I don\u0027t hug you enough after you\u0027ve wrestled me\n"},{"text":"Gripped my throat\n"},{"text":"Grabbed my boob 2 or 3 times\n"},{"text":"Tickled me aggressively\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"And pecked me\n"},{"text":"So many kisses\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I just want no be like hey\n"},{"text":"We\u0027re getting a little heavy, you\u0027re squeezing my butt as we sit in the front seat of my parents car with transparent windshields\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"You\u0027re aggressively being affectionate and were in public\n"},{"text":"Please tone it down\n"},{"text":"If seeing you is not enough\n"},{"text":"If you have a high libido and it\u0027s not worth it to tone it down\n"},{"text":"You don\u0027t have to\n"},{"text":"You just don\u0027t have to do it with me\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"It\u0027s so hard\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I\u0027m so furking frustrated\n"},{"text":"Fr\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I\u0027m so furking annoyed bro\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"Am I being unreasonable\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I don\u0027t want to stop being affectionate\n"},{"text":"I love you\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"And I partly understand that you love me and want to show off your love\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"But god\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"It\u0027s not only about the ppl, like what will the public think\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"It\u0027s also about me\n"},{"text":"I feel uncomfortable\n"},{"text":"Does that make you care\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"You tell me I\u0027m not with it\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I drop it\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I feel like I do a good job of that most of the time\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I say, I\u0027m over it\n"},{"text":"You feel bad and I feel like stating my position or feelings pushed you away\n"},{"text":"And you\u0027re a man, you\u0027re much stronger than me , why would you be pulling and pushing me\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I\u0027d like to not do that\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"And is it about possession, I don\u0027t restrict, anything you do, in the hopes that you won\u0027t. But I feel claustrophobic\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"Like I\u0027m leaving this ( my rents ) behind to go do the same thing elsewhere\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"Furk\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"Why the uncomfortable questions\n"},{"text":"Will you kiss me , while sitting at the bartender\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"Come sit on my lap\n"},{"text":"God\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"Do you think, his other girlfriends did this and he expects you to do it too\n"},{"embeddedObjects":[{"type":"horizontalRuleLine"}]},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I\u0027m holding so much anxiety it\u0027s insane, I\u0027m double cheeked up , holding a big stone in my chest that when I talk about my feelings, ppl will me "},{"attributes":{"bold":true},"text":"unhappy w me\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"And leave me alone. Wataniacha\n"},{"text":"\n"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":455},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2024-03-04T20:21:38Z
- modifiedDate 2024-03-06T15:28:23Z
- creationDevice 23129RAA4G
- creationOSName Android
- creationOSVersion 13
- creationDeviceType Xiaomi
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid 9695BA1F0DED49CC8BA50E4350B3CBCB
- starred false
- pinned false
- text # '
- ,
- .
- I think she's insane
- Or maybe I'm just biased
- No other regular mother is doing this
- ***
- My day has been trash, d can feel the void pain that indicates bubbly gutsz
- It's like a train, I can feel all of them influence each other
- Colon to colon, poop to poop
- richText {"contents":[{"attributes":{"line":{"header":1}},"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"I think she\u0027s insane\n"},{"text":"Or maybe I\u0027m just biased\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"No other regular mother is doing this\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"embeddedObjects":[{"type":"horizontalRuleLine"}]},{"text":"My day has been trash, d can feel the void pain that indicates bubbly gutsz\n"},{"text":"It\u0027s like a train, I can feel all of them influence each other\n"},{"text":"Colon to colon, poop to poop"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":455},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2024-03-02T21:53:01Z
- modifiedDate 2024-03-06T15:28:38Z
- creationDevice 23129RAA4G
- creationOSName Android
- creationOSVersion 13
- creationDeviceType Xiaomi
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid 127CFAB2B9E94C65B13C6311B0A9E2CB
- starred false
- pinned false
- text # '
- ,
- .
- It went down
- I'm surprised at how I had more regrets that expected
- ***
- So sorry babe for how I made you feel last night, I feel pretty awful about it and I promise it won't happen again. I love you so much❤️
- ***
- I wanna really disect this tbh
- I do
- ***
- I got home and I'm so pissed
- My mom came into my room and moved and took my stuff
- It does not feel like a sanctuary
- I feel violated
- richText {"contents":[{"attributes":{"line":{"header":1}},"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"It went down\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I\u0027m surprised at how I had more regrets that expected\n"},{"embeddedObjects":[{"type":"horizontalRuleLine"}]},{"text":"So sorry babe for how I made you feel last night, I feel pretty awful about it and I promise it won\u0027t happen again. I love you so much❤️\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"embeddedObjects":[{"type":"horizontalRuleLine"}]},{"text":"I wanna really disect this tbh\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I do\n"},{"embeddedObjects":[{"type":"horizontalRuleLine"}]},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I got home and I\u0027m so pissed\n"},{"text":"My mom came into my room and moved and took my stuff\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"It does not feel like a sanctuary\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I feel violated\n"},{"text":"\n"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":455},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2024-03-01T07:40:12Z
- modifiedDate 2024-03-01T20:49:41Z
- creationDevice 23129RAA4G
- creationOSName Android
- creationOSVersion 13
- creationDeviceType Xiaomi
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid CB023864F49249889D544D617DF77335
- starred false
- pinned false
- text # '
- ,
- .
- Today's the day
- ***
- I went and checked out
- I took the bags and keys
- I'm honestly so excited
- I can't wait, not to buy wine.
- Food ?
- ***
- I'm anxious but I'm really looking forward to it.
- I can't wait
- Thank god for work.
- I'm so, excited
- richText {"contents":[{"attributes":{"line":{"header":1}},"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"Today\u0027s the day\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"embeddedObjects":[{"type":"horizontalRuleLine"}]},{"text":"I went and checked out\n"},{"text":"I took the bags and keys\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I\u0027m honestly so excited\n"},{"text":"I can\u0027t wait, not to buy wine.\n"},{"text":"Food ?\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"embeddedObjects":[{"type":"horizontalRuleLine"}]},{"text":"I\u0027m anxious but I\u0027m really looking forward to it.\n"},{"text":"I can\u0027t wait\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"Thank god for work.\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I\u0027m so, excited"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":454},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2024-02-29T04:00:48Z
- modifiedDate 2024-03-01T07:40:01Z
- creationDevice 23129RAA4G
- creationOSName Android
- creationOSVersion 13
- creationDeviceType Xiaomi
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid 3B6F5245742D468289157A32A14A3B33
- starred false
- pinned false
- text # '
- ,
- .
- My poop today was super decent
- Super super smooth
- It happened right after I sent someone else my money
- 46 instead of 45
- Fucking hell
- It might be gone the way of fuliza so 😭😭
- richText {"contents":[{"attributes":{"line":{"header":1}},"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"My poop today was super decent\n"},{"text":"Super super smooth\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"It happened right after I sent someone else my money\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"46 instead of 45\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"Fucking hell\n"},{"text":"It might be gone the way of fuliza so 😭😭"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":456},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2024-02-27T12:44:16Z
- modifiedDate 2024-04-04T20:26:44Z
- creationDevice 23129RAA4G
- creationOSName Android
- creationOSVersion 13
- creationDeviceType Xiaomi
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid 9ECC9CDB9A29414E9BEBCC7F49544372
- starred false
- pinned false
- text # ,
- ,
- .
- Philip can not know how much he has helped me
- By sending me the money to pay for the rooms.
- I'm so thankful
- So grateful
- I can't explain the feeling of having someone you can run to and ask for help
- richText {"contents":[{"attributes":{"line":{"header":1}},"text":",\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"Philip can not know how much he has helped me\n"},{"text":"By sending me the money to pay for the rooms.\n"},{"text":"I\u0027m so thankful\n"},{"text":"So grateful\n"},{"text":"I can\u0027t explain the feeling of having someone you can run to and ask for help"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":456},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2024-02-26T15:27:26Z
- modifiedDate 2024-04-04T20:26:51Z
- creationDevice 23129RAA4G
- creationOSName Android
- creationOSVersion 13
- creationDeviceType Xiaomi
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid 201E304C6DF94737AC85649E7E0CCF36
- starred false
- pinned false
- text # '
- ,
- .
- I feel really alone
- Is this what being an adult feels like
- I really appreciate having Phil
- richText {"contents":[{"attributes":{"line":{"header":1}},"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"I feel really alone\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"Is this what being an adult feels like\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I really appreciate having Phil"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":456},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2024-02-25T19:30:41Z
- modifiedDate 2024-04-04T20:27:03Z
- creationDevice 23129RAA4G
- creationOSName Android
- creationOSVersion 13
- creationDeviceType Xiaomi
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid 5D9FE66B6EEE4F14AC00287491DCBAE9
- starred false
- pinned false
- text # '
- ,
- .
- I'm in the nursing council, 2nd floor , 2nd toilet w a broken door
- Taking a violent shit
- Like muscular cramps violent. Gd
- It is such a detox, I can feel my stomach and lower abdominal muscles, chill out. Like intense
- Liquid farts
- And sb is in the room w me
- richText {"contents":[{"attributes":{"line":{"header":1}},"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"I\u0027m in the nursing council, 2nd floor , 2nd toilet w a broken door\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"Taking a violent shit\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"Like muscular cramps violent. Gd\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"It is such a detox, I can feel my stomach and lower abdominal muscles, chill out. Like intense\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"Liquid farts\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"And sb is in the room w me"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":456},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2024-02-21T11:22:08Z
- modifiedDate 2024-04-04T20:27:09Z
- creationDevice 23129RAA4G
- creationOSName Android
- creationOSVersion 13
- creationDeviceType Xiaomi
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid CB1AE4715AA147F5A7AFA7CC8D8BEE63
- starred false
- pinned false
- text # '
- ,
- .
- The way this day is starting out bruh
- One missile ati nimeedit majina , another one ati we should watch out for time bruv
- I was stepping in too hard, when she was out. But she's back now, now we chill
- Stepping too hard
- ***
- It's 5 pm, I'm in town and I am so furking paranoid
- I wanted to leave the car
- But I can't. I am feeling my anxiety go up 'bout it. So I shan't step out. I'll rot in here and wait for phil
- richText {"contents":[{"attributes":{"line":{"header":1}},"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"The way this day is starting out bruh\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"One missile ati nimeedit majina , another one ati we should watch out for time bruv\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I was stepping in too hard, when she was out. But she\u0027s back now, now we chill\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"Stepping too hard\n"},{"embeddedObjects":[{"type":"horizontalRuleLine"}]},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"It\u0027s 5 pm, I\u0027m in town and I am so furking paranoid\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I wanted to leave the car\n"},{"text":"But I can\u0027t. I am feeling my anxiety go up \u0027bout it. So I shan\u0027t step out. I\u0027ll rot in here and wait for phil\n"},{"text":"\n"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":456},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2024-02-19T06:30:52Z
- modifiedDate 2024-04-04T20:27:40Z
- creationDevice 23129RAA4G
- creationOSName Android
- creationOSVersion 13
- creationDeviceType Xiaomi
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid 78A76D6022AA4B02AD4E7CD32EE9500D
- starred false
- pinned false
- text # '
- ,
- .
- When Joel said " bure kabisa" because I couldn't write him a memo as a graduate, he meant it.
- And when Nₐjₒli was awful jana, she meant I
- And I have to make peace with the fact that I was manipulated yesterday. And I fell for it hook line and sinker.
- I gave him my money, he withdrew it, u could have gone to court or called my dad, but I was ashamed
- It is my fault. I admit it. My ego is hurt tho
- And I shan't fall for it again. It's court for me next time.
- ***
- Pooped too hard, water went right up my bootyhole.
- Right up. Touched and all as we speak
- richText {"contents":[{"attributes":{"line":{"header":1}},"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"When Joel said \" bure kabisa\" because I couldn\u0027t write him a memo as a graduate, he meant it.\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"And when Nₐjₒli was awful jana, she meant I\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"And I have to make peace with the fact that I was manipulated yesterday. And I fell for it hook line and sinker.\n"},{"text":"I gave him my money, he withdrew it, u could have gone to court or called my dad, but I was ashamed\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"It is my fault. I admit it. My ego is hurt tho\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"And I shan\u0027t fall for it again. It\u0027s court for me next time.\n"},{"embeddedObjects":[{"type":"horizontalRuleLine"}]},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"Pooped too hard, water went right up my bootyhole.\n"},{"text":"Right up. Touched and all as we speak\n"},{"text":"\n"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":456},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2024-02-14T07:53:56Z
- modifiedDate 2024-04-04T20:28:18Z
- creationDevice 23129RAA4G
- creationOSName Android
- creationOSVersion 13
- creationDeviceType Xiaomi
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid 0002639BFA2741029AD9E7CD9459A1AF
- starred false
- pinned false
- text '
- ,
- .
- I paid my first bribe today, I feel like shit.
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"I paid my first bribe today, I feel like shit."}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":451},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2024-02-13T18:06:44Z
- modifiedDate 2024-02-13T18:07:17Z
- creationDevice 23129RAA4G
- creationOSName Android
- creationOSVersion 13
- creationDeviceType Xiaomi
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid 8D7964A396604D1B94EBFF16DCEBE063
- starred false
- pinned false
- text # '
- ,
- .
- On the 13th of February 2024, I was stopped by a police officer before the Mayfair valley road junction. He informed me that I was on a one way road. I was in disbelief since I had used that road only that morning.
- He asked for my license and some questions about my workplace. Then he said I had committed a crime of obstruction. And I had to go to the police station with him. And get a receipt for a cash bail and appear in court the next day.
- He got into my car and directed me to drive.
- After some back and forth driving, he directed me to stop.
- And send him money through mpesa. 860057 - Eddyvilla Agencies Saika Near Saika Estate Stage
- I felt very afraid and threatened, he had my driving licence and he was carrying a rifle which he had laid across his lap as he sat in the passenger seat of my car.
- I sent it to him, he shook my hand and insisted that he had not harrased me. He then walked out and I drove away.
- richText {"contents":[{"attributes":{"line":{"header":1}},"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"On the 13th of February 2024, I was stopped by a police officer before the Mayfair valley road junction. He informed me that I was on a one way road. I was in disbelief since I had used that road only that morning.\n"},{"text":"He asked for my license and some questions about my workplace. Then he said I had committed a crime of obstruction. And I had to go to the police station with him. And get a receipt for a cash bail and appear in court the next day.\n"},{"text":"He got into my car and directed me to drive.\n"},{"text":"After some back and forth driving, he directed me to stop.\n"},{"text":"And send him money through mpesa. 860057 - Eddyvilla Agencies Saika Near Saika Estate Stage\n"},{"text":"I felt very afraid and threatened, he had my driving licence and he was carrying a rifle which he had laid across his lap as he sat in the passenger seat of my car.\n"},{"text":"I sent it to him, he shook my hand and insisted that he had not harrased me. He then walked out and I drove away."}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":456},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2024-02-13T17:50:56Z
- modifiedDate 2024-04-04T20:28:52Z
- creationDevice 23129RAA4G
- creationOSName Android
- creationOSVersion 13
- creationDeviceType Xiaomi
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid 4CC0FA4A8B4D409EA6ADE8B02ACE4404
- starred false
- pinned false
- text ## 👋 This is your Day One
- We're so glad you're here. Keeping a journal could be one of the most powerful decisions of your life.
- https://youtu.be/u9Kpb7wFv1s
- > We write to taste life twice, in the moment and in retrospection.
- > - ANAÏS NIN
- ## Getting Started with Day One
- - [ ] 📝 Create your first entry now by jotting down a few thoughts about what happened today
- - [ ] 📸 Add a photo to make your entry more vivid
- - [ ] [💡 Try a journal template](templates)for more inspiration
- *Want to learn even more about how to use Day One?* [*Check out the Day One Getting Started Guide.*](getstarted)
- ***
- **⭐️Want to unlock the complete Day One experience?** [**Learn more about Premium.**](premium)
- richText {"contents":[{"attributes":{"line":{"header":2}},"text":"👋 This is your Day One\n"},{"text":"We\u0027re so glad you\u0027re here. Keeping a journal could be one of the most powerful decisions of your life."},{"embeddedObjects":[{"type":"preview","url":"https://youtu.be/u9Kpb7wFv1s"}]},{"text":"\n"},{"attributes":{"line":{"indentLevel":1,"quote":true}},"text":"We write to taste life twice, in the moment and in retrospection.\n"},{"attributes":{"line":{"indentLevel":1,"quote":true}},"text":"- ANAÏS NIN\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"attributes":{"line":{"header":2}},"text":"Getting Started with Day One\n"},{"attributes":{"line":{"checked":false,"header":0,"indentLevel":1,"listStyle":"checkbox"}},"text":"📝 Create your first entry now by jotting down a few thoughts about what happened today\n"},{"attributes":{"line":{"checked":false,"header":0,"indentLevel":1,"listStyle":"checkbox"}},"text":"📸 Add a photo to make your entry more vivid\n"},{"attributes":{"line":{"checked":false,"header":0,"indentLevel":1,"listStyle":"checkbox"},"linkURL":"templates"},"text":"💡 Try a journal template "},{"attributes":{"line":{"checked":false,"header":0,"indentLevel":1,"listStyle":"checkbox"}},"text":"for more inspiration\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"attributes":{"italic":true},"text":"Want to learn even more about how to use Day One? "},{"attributes":{"italic":true,"linkURL":"getstarted"},"text":"Check out the Day One Getting Started Guide.\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"embeddedObjects":[{"type":"horizontalRuleLine"}]},{"attributes":{"bold":true},"text":"⭐️Want to unlock the complete Day One experience? "},{"attributes":{"bold":true,"linkURL":"premium"},"text":"Learn more about Premium.\n"},{"text":"\n"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":456},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2024-02-13T17:50:46Z
- modifiedDate 2024-04-04T20:29:17Z
- creationDevice 23129RAA4G
- creationOSName Android
- creationOSVersion 13
- creationDeviceType Xiaomi
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid 89FEC03C38204E86A88A2D0E50BACC22
- starred false
- pinned false
- text '
- ,
- .
- porn was consumed , a shame.
- no churchz
- food was eaten
- no work was done
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"porn was consumed , a shame.\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"no churchz\n"},{"text":"food was eaten\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"no work was done"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":456},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2024-02-03T06:07:14Z
- modifiedDate 2024-04-04T20:29:24Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid 5179DBD4ED2841FBA2F1714468BC6199
- starred false
- pinned false
- text '
- ,
- .
- I'm farting terribly today
- ***
- And I'm annoyed at the ppl I love.
- Because i can't be annoyed at anyone else, despite their treatment of me
- Because I don't trust them to be safe.
- They're strangers to me
- So I **displace**my anger on the safe ppl around me
- Or rather Philip
- So I'm sorry me boy
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"I\u0027m farting terribly today\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"embeddedObjects":[{"type":"horizontalRuleLine"}]},{"text":"And I\u0027m annoyed at the ppl I love.\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"Because i can\u0027t be annoyed at anyone else, despite their treatment of me\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"Because I don\u0027t trust them to be safe.\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"They\u0027re strangers to me\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"So I "},{"attributes":{"bold":true},"text":"displace "},{"text":"my anger on the safe ppl around me\n"},{"text":"Or rather Philip\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"So I\u0027m sorry me boy\n"},{"text":"\n"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":456},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2024-01-29T08:33:10Z
- modifiedDate 2024-04-04T20:29:31Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid CD5FFCD91A424593B046C5EDEF9FB1FB
- starred false
- pinned false
- text '
- ,
- .
- I feel like a child
- And I feel like the boy is posturing
- I meant I thought he was adding swagger to act like a man.
- But I've had a bad day overall.
- All I've done is rub the nub today
- And it hasn't been good. It's been a bully wank. Swear to god.
- All the damn day
- And all of damn yesterday too.
- Honestly I've felt bad, unmoored. I wanted, craved the dopamine.
- And I wanna be fucked, like all ppl do.
- So I've spent the weekend doing nothing at all.
- ***
- And apparently I'm a thorn in Lillians side because I don't obey.
- Fuck her
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I feel like a child\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"And I feel like the boy is posturing\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I meant I thought he was adding swagger to act like a man.\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"But I\u0027ve had a bad day overall.\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"All I\u0027ve done is rub the nub today\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"And it hasn\u0027t been good. It\u0027s been a bully wank. Swear to god.\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"All the damn day\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"And all of damn yesterday too.\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"Honestly I\u0027ve felt bad, unmoored. I wanted, craved the dopamine.\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"And I wanna be fucked, like all ppl do.\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"So I\u0027ve spent the weekend doing nothing at all.\n"},{"embeddedObjects":[{"type":"horizontalRuleLine"}]},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"And apparently I\u0027m a thorn in Lillians side because I don\u0027t obey.\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"Fuck her\n"},{"text":"\n"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":456},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2024-01-21T11:38:02Z
- modifiedDate 2024-04-04T20:29:56Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid 279F8B2BDD89442682DADF555DCEE1DA
- starred false
- pinned false
- text '
- ,
- .
- Today a policeman shouted at me
- When I went to u turn at the total ring road
- So I could come down onno the ngong Langata ring road.
- So I felt bad
- To be denied
- But also for getting annoyed at having to help someone
- I am too entitled to other ppls money, cars et ce te ra
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"Today a policeman shouted at me\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"When I went to u turn at the total ring road\n"},{"text":"So I could come down onno the ngong Langata ring road.\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"So I felt bad\n"},{"text":"To be denied\n"},{"text":"But also for getting annoyed at having to help someone\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I am too entitled to other ppls money, cars et ce te ra"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":435},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2024-01-18T15:43:11Z
- modifiedDate 2024-01-20T05:46:17Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid 6D1088673E5545538E0D553ABF64D724
- starred false
- pinned false
- text '
- ,
- .
- I succumbed to the devil again
- I just want to see noked ppl doing things that I imagine feel better for them than it does for me.
- ***
- Tomorrow, I wil be thankful for that job.
- Thankful for the opportunity it affords me to be out of the house
- For I remember how I ached for one. So that my mother may leave me be
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I succumbed to the devil again\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I just want to see noked ppl doing things that I imagine feel better for them than it does for me.\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"embeddedObjects":[{"type":"horizontalRuleLine"}]},{"text":"Tomorrow, I wil be thankful for that job.\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"Thankful for the opportunity it affords me to be out of the house\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"For I remember how I ached for one. So that my mother may leave me be\n"},{"text":"\n"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":435},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2024-01-14T15:28:27Z
- modifiedDate 2024-01-20T05:46:22Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid 55B3E7565A9E4BF4A2BFFE2261459540
- starred false
- pinned false
- text '
- ,
- .
- The week is ending
- But god I'm anxious
- Anxiety attack started a few mins ago
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"The week is ending\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"But god I\u0027m anxious\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"Anxiety attack started a few mins ago"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":456},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2024-01-12T12:02:09Z
- modifiedDate 2024-04-04T20:30:51Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid 034B36E882E7495FA083BCE20AB24744
- starred false
- pinned false
- text '
- ,
- .
- Some ugly fucker with an overbite
- Came and breathed on me
- Nd it stank.
- I'm pissed and I feel filthy
- ***
- I'm pissed again. I'm so tired. I want out.
- I really can't believe it.
- Some fucker is asking me to write a letter on his behalf.
- And he supposed to be writing a letter on behalf of his sister.
- I fuckin hate it here.
- It's your sister.
- Ati I'll give you the details
- Jesus. Muthafuckin Christ
- Jesus
- I don't wanna be a secretary anymore.
- The money isn't worth it.
- If this shit doesn't make me ambitious I don't know what will
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"Some ugly fucker with an overbite\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"Came and breathed on me\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"Nd it stank.\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I\u0027m pissed and I feel filthy\n"},{"embeddedObjects":[{"type":"horizontalRuleLine"}]},{"text":"I\u0027m pissed again. I\u0027m so tired. I want out.\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I really can\u0027t believe it.\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"Some fucker is asking me to write a letter on his behalf.\n"},{"text":"And he supposed to be writing a letter on behalf of his sister.\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I fuckin hate it here.\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"It\u0027s your sister.\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"Ati I\u0027ll give you the details\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"Jesus. Muthafuckin Christ\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"Jesus\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I don\u0027t wanna be a secretary anymore.\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"The money isn\u0027t worth it.\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"If this shit doesn\u0027t make me ambitious I don\u0027t know what will\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":456},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2024-01-10T09:21:52Z
- modifiedDate 2024-04-04T20:30:59Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid 72234EEDE2134CE59D7B1EA63C1D45EA
- starred false
- pinned false
- text '
- ,
- .
- .
- My mom is absolutely furious
- Absolutely steaming mad
- She has threatened to beat me.
- I need to make peace with that
- Not like I'm at peace.
- But if she does, which I think she will
- Then I need to be ok . After
- It won't make me do what she wants me to do.
- So there is that
- ***
- I have fallen for the free porn videos again
- I need a vibrator
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"My mom is absolutely furious\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"Absolutely steaming mad\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"She has threatened to beat me.\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I need to make peace with that\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"Not like I\u0027m at peace.\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"But if she does, which I think she will\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"Then I need to be ok . After\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"It won\u0027t make me do what she wants me to do.\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"So there is that\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"embeddedObjects":[{"type":"horizontalRuleLine"}]},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I have fallen for the free porn videos again\n"},{"text":"I need a vibrator\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":456},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2024-01-06T07:19:27Z
- modifiedDate 2024-04-04T20:31:27Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- location
- region
- center
- longitude 36.8505472
- latitude -1.3261384
- localityName Nairobi
- country Kenya
- longitude 36.8505472
- latitude -1.3261384
- administrativeArea Nairobi County
- placeName Nairobi
- address Total Mombasa Road, South Block, Nairobi, Kenya
- weather
- temperatureCelsius 21.17
- windBearing 41
- pressureMB 1016.68
- visibilityKM 24476.86
- relativeHumidity 0
- windSpeedKPH 5.65
- weatherCode Cloudy
- windChillCelsius 0
- v
- uuid 40818384582341A68C7C87E82C7EB002
- starred false
- pinned false
- text '
- ,
- ,
- .
- Highlights
- I bought some liquor
- It cost 709
- Before that, I peed in the rain
- And I think it got into the car.
- I parked on the side of the road, in the lasting rain
- Poked my butt out and peed
- So yeah
- Eventful as fuck
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"Highlights\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I bought some liquor\n"},{"text":"It cost 709\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"Before that, I peed in the rain\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"And I think it got into the car.\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I parked on the side of the road, in the lasting rain\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"Poked my butt out and peed\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"So yeah\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"Eventful as fuck"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":456},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2024-01-05T07:51:25Z
- modifiedDate 2024-04-04T20:31:41Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- location
- region
- center
- longitude 36.8505472
- latitude -1.3261384
- localityName Nairobi
- country Kenya
- longitude 36.8505472
- latitude -1.3261384
- administrativeArea Nairobi County
- placeName Nairobi
- address Total Mombasa Road, South Block, Nairobi, Kenya
- weather
- temperatureCelsius 23.23
- windBearing 274
- pressureMB 1015.55
- visibilityKM 25008.51
- relativeHumidity 0
- windSpeedKPH 3.12
- weatherCode PartlyCloudy
- windChillCelsius 0
- v
- uuid 97190EB2E2DB46CA89464A78C9FAF44F
- starred false
- pinned false
- text '
- ,
- ..
- I'm pissed that your first convo with me is to chastise me
- when you could tell me what it is I should do, and how to do it
- I'm out of sorts actually
- but I'm trying not to pout and make a show that i feel bad
- Ungeniambia Tu, fanya hivi !
- hii inahitajika
- Just that.
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"..\n"},{"text":"I\u0027m pissed that your first convo with me is to chastise me\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"when you could tell me what it is I should do, and how to do it\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I\u0027m out of sorts actually\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"but I\u0027m trying not to pout and make a show that i feel bad\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"Ungeniambia Tu, fanya hivi !\n"},{"text":"hii inahitajika\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"Just that.\n"},{"text":"\n"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":435},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2024-01-02T07:06:46Z
- modifiedDate 2024-01-09T15:35:32Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- location
- region
- center
- longitude 36.8505472
- latitude -1.3261384
- localityName Nairobi
- country Kenya
- longitude 36.8505472
- latitude -1.3261384
- administrativeArea Nairobi County
- placeName Nairobi
- address Total Mombasa Road, South Block, Nairobi, Kenya
- weather
- temperatureCelsius 22.17
- windBearing 51
- pressureMB 1016.32
- visibilityKM 24813.39
- relativeHumidity 0
- windSpeedKPH 9.32
- weatherCode PartlyCloudy
- windChillCelsius 0
- v
- uuid 9C070532A948459FA8EF619D99D30C90
- starred false
- pinned false
- text '
- ,
- .
- Wow
- can't believe I started the year off mean!
- I'm tired, I don't wanna leave
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"Wow\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"can\u0027t believe I started the year off mean!\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I\u0027m tired, I don\u0027t wanna leave"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":435},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2024-01-01T12:29:29Z
- modifiedDate 2024-01-09T15:35:49Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- location
- region
- center
- longitude 36.8505472
- latitude -1.3261384
- localityName Nairobi
- country Kenya
- longitude 36.8505472
- latitude -1.3261384
- administrativeArea Nairobi County
- placeName Nairobi
- address Total Mombasa Road, South Block, Nairobi, Kenya
- weather
- temperatureCelsius 27.21
- windBearing 73
- pressureMB 1010.05
- visibilityKM 18771.39
- relativeHumidity 0
- windSpeedKPH 13.15
- weatherCode PartlyCloudy
- windChillCelsius 0
- v
- uuid B6429A9B27504DA98D469DB2F56BA28E
- starred false
- pinned false
- text I folded and got tor
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"I folded and got tor"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":435},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2023-12-30T13:17:56Z
- modifiedDate 2024-01-09T15:35:53Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- location
- region
- center
- longitude 36.8505472
- latitude -1.3261384
- localityName Nairobi
- country Kenya
- longitude 36.8505472
- latitude -1.3261384
- administrativeArea Nairobi County
- placeName Nairobi
- address Total Mombasa Road, South Block, Nairobi, Kenya
- v
- uuid DBF19A3C668E46328BA83354E303D982
- starred false
- pinned false
- text '
- .
- .
- It's my baby's birthday tomorrow
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"It\u0027s my baby\u0027s birthday tomorrow"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":435},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2023-12-27T18:00:34Z
- modifiedDate 2024-01-09T15:36:03Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- location
- region
- center
- longitude 36.8505472
- latitude -1.3261384
- localityName Nairobi
- country Kenya
- longitude 36.8505472
- latitude -1.3261384
- administrativeArea Nairobi County
- placeName Nairobi
- address Total Mombasa Road, South Block, Nairobi, Kenya
- weather
- temperatureCelsius 18.91
- windBearing 34
- pressureMB 1016.53
- visibilityKM 25638.11
- relativeHumidity 0
- windSpeedKPH 12.16
- weatherCode PartlyCloudy
- windChillCelsius 0
- v
- uuid 12B233846EF24A479ADE0DA9914B7D94
- starred false
- pinned false
- text '
- ,
- .
- So I am travelling back by myself by plane.
- Sad times.
- In fact I'm so sad because my family have really eaten me up. By that I mean they have indoctrinated me back into them
- Because they're on their way back tomorrow and ninjas are like, I miss you
- Bxtch you're seeing me tomorrow
- But by holding me in their armpit like that, I'm not feeling the loss or the separation from them all the sweeter
- dygm
- Do You Get Me
- I'll feel the sting of their departure deeper next time the way things are going
- goddamn. Fr
- Also, why am I updating the boy so vigorously
- He's not paying for my trip
- Not that he should , but I'm really on it
- I'm here babe, I'm there babe.he don't tell me shit though
- ***
- American babies cry as badly as their African counterparts
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"So I am travelling back by myself by plane.\n"},{"text":"Sad times.\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"In fact I\u0027m so sad because my family have really eaten me up. By that I mean they have indoctrinated me back into them\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"Because they\u0027re on their way back tomorrow and ninjas are like, I miss you\n"},{"text":"Bxtch you\u0027re seeing me tomorrow\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"But by holding me in their armpit like that, I\u0027m not feeling the loss or the separation from them all the sweeter\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"dygm\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"Do You Get Me\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I\u0027ll feel the sting of their departure deeper next time the way things are going\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"goddamn. Fr\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"Also, why am I updating the boy so vigorously\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"He\u0027s not paying for my trip\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"Not that he should , but I\u0027m really on it\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I\u0027m here babe, I\u0027m there babe.he don\u0027t tell me shit though\n"},{"embeddedObjects":[{"type":"horizontalRuleLine"}]},{"text":"American babies cry as badly as their African counterparts\n"},{"text":"\n"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":456},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2023-12-26T14:03:45Z
- modifiedDate 2024-04-04T20:32:05Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- location
- region
- center
- longitude 36.8505472
- latitude -1.3261384
- localityName Nairobi
- country Kenya
- longitude 36.8505472
- latitude -1.3261384
- administrativeArea Nairobi County
- placeName Nairobi
- address Total Mombasa Road, South Block, Nairobi, Kenya
- weather
- temperatureCelsius 23.03
- windBearing 65
- pressureMB 1009.74
- visibilityKM 24022.89
- relativeHumidity 0
- windSpeedKPH 24.19
- weatherCode Windy
- windChillCelsius 0
- v
- uuid A96232285AD64502AF6C1AC82D83CB68
- starred false
- pinned false
- text '
- ,
- .
- It's kwis mas
- And I'm sad. After my mother picked us apart
- I'm looking at some photos Phil sent, and I am spectacularly ugly
- Ugly with a capital U
- Fuck I can't wait to goto Nairobi
- Also amka soap - Nia Ataara, the patchouli smells wonderful. I want to steal it. It's a shame I would be identified
- ***
- I have failed no describe the depth of anger at my other . Fuck holidays together. I don't wanna spend time with her
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"It\u0027s kwis mas\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"And I\u0027m sad. After my mother picked us apart\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I\u0027m looking at some photos Phil sent, and I am spectacularly ugly\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"Ugly with a capital U\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"Fuck I can\u0027t wait to goto Nairobi\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"Also amka soap - Nia Ataara, the patchouli smells wonderful. I want to steal it. It\u0027s a shame I would be identified\n"},{"embeddedObjects":[{"type":"horizontalRuleLine"}]},{"text":"I have failed no describe the depth of anger at my other . Fuck holidays together. I don\u0027t wanna spend time with her\n"},{"text":"\n"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":456},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2023-12-25T09:41:48Z
- modifiedDate 2024-04-04T20:32:52Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid 2201DE2EF00F475B9D5380966CEB2CD0
- starred false
- pinned false
- text '
- ,
- .
- Way too fuckin hot.
- All my shit is cotton.
- I need linen
- Every single cell of my body is sweating
- Every single cell in my body is hot
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"Way too fuckin hot.\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"All my shit is cotton.\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I need linen\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"Every single cell of my body is sweating\n"},{"text":"Every single cell in my body is hot"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":456},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2023-12-24T09:50:50Z
- modifiedDate 2024-04-04T20:33:31Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid AB0ADA60B0504320BD7F619B9C33F36C
- starred false
- pinned false
- text '
- ,
- .
- I'm in MSA, near ukunda
- I pooped and it stunk like a goat. It was green and brown.
- Real bad
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"I\u0027m in MSA, near ukunda\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I pooped and it stunk like a goat. It was green and brown.\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"Real bad"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":456},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2023-12-23T11:16:28Z
- modifiedDate 2024-04-04T20:33:39Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid 375890347E7C4463A7AB9CD0E5899BF4
- starred false
- pinned false
- text '
- ,
- .
- Bruh
- I'm so fucking sad today
- So bad
- I'm the only one at the office, I feel like trash
- My mom called me and my heart rejoiced
- because at least someone looked for me
- ***
- I think I'm feeling down cos I haven't eaten. I've pooped so I feel better
- But I still have no food in me, I don't want to eat only snacks
- But I don't see any fruits or veg that I can get in a supermarket
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"Bruh\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I\u0027m so fucking sad today\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"So bad\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I\u0027m the only one at the office, I feel like trash\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"My mom called me and my heart rejoiced\n"},{"text":"because at least someone looked for me\n"},{"embeddedObjects":[{"type":"horizontalRuleLine"}]},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I think I\u0027m feeling down cos I haven\u0027t eaten. I\u0027ve pooped so I feel better\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"But I still have no food in me, I don\u0027t want to eat only snacks\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"But I don\u0027t see any fruits or veg that I can get in a supermarket\n"},{"text":"\n"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":435},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2023-12-22T11:08:49Z
- modifiedDate 2023-12-23T11:16:44Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid E49A1638A15445E1970DBB15F3100905
- starred false
- pinned false
- text '
- ,
- .
- Woke up at 6 on the dot
- needing ebastel, when I bend over my nose leaks
- ***
- Got to work, I'm at Pauline's, bit frightening
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"Woke up at 6 on the dot\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"needing ebastel, when I bend over my nose leaks\n"},{"embeddedObjects":[{"type":"horizontalRuleLine"}]},{"text":"Got to work, I\u0027m at Pauline\u0027s, bit frightening\n"},{"text":"\n"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":456},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2023-12-18T03:48:14Z
- modifiedDate 2024-04-04T20:33:48Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid 86E25E0A40BF43E8A29379358F5FAFC3
- starred false
- pinned false
- text '
- ,
- .
- I had 3 poops today
- Pebbley and hard
- Then smooth and soft
- And lots of water in the morning so lots of pee
- I miss the boy
- I'm getting annoyed with my mom
- Or my moms tone again
- My parents went for a walk and now they're back
- I liked tatu city
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"I had 3 poops today\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"Pebbley and hard\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"Then smooth and soft\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"And lots of water in the morning so lots of pee\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I miss the boy\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I\u0027m getting annoyed with my mom\n"},{"text":"Or my moms tone again\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"My parents went for a walk and now they\u0027re back\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I liked tatu city"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":456},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2023-12-17T09:04:53Z
- modifiedDate 2024-04-04T20:33:52Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid 3244EDD933E8497D936B9DB3211AB1A5
- starred false
- pinned false
- text '
- ,
- .
- do not call me in the middle of the day to catch up
- It feels icky
- And I am thoroughly fucking annoyed
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"do not call me in the middle of the day to catch up\n"},{"text":"It feels icky\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"And I am thoroughly fucking annoyed"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":456},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2023-12-15T10:05:06Z
- modifiedDate 2024-04-04T20:33:59Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid 2BE5A267D3554757B83DD812DB639416
- starred false
- pinned false
- text '
- ,
- .
- Cheboi, a kind, cool human.
- Can tell I'm laughing because she's fat
- And I fell like a little shit
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"Cheboi, a kind, cool human.\n"},{"text":"Can tell I\u0027m laughing because she\u0027s fat\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"And I fell like a little shit"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":456},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2023-12-14T08:56:31Z
- modifiedDate 2024-04-04T20:34:04Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid 4B1ABA9AAC2944669379715F03FD86BC
- starred false
- pinned false
- text '
- ,
- .
- Wah
- Some guy with glasses and a brown coat came and traumatised me fr fr
- I swear
- I haven't been caught up all of last week. But damn
- pissed me tf off
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"Wah\n"},{"text":"Some guy with glasses and a brown coat came and traumatised me fr fr\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I swear\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I haven\u0027t been caught up all of last week. But damn\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"pissed me tf off"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":456},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2023-12-11T11:44:40Z
- modifiedDate 2024-04-04T20:34:09Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid 6A9F9092D8164A07BBE6D24F17A4DC6A
- starred false
- pinned false
- text '
- ,
- .
- Good day
- Ir*oned*like a mofo
- I feel like a part of the family; my parents are being nice to me.
- My father asked me about it and gave me some advice on screaming fighting and mentioned he's praying for me to be brave.
- I miss Phil. I love him and I want to be around him and talk to him.
- I wish he was here and Im absolutely scared of losing him
- ***
- Also the slave like aspects of Alice are coming through
- but I'd be a damn liar if I said I didn't enjoy her labour
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"Good day\n"},{"text":"Ir"},{"attributes":{"italic":true},"text":"oned "},{"text":"like a mofo\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I feel like a part of the family; my parents are being nice to me.\n"},{"text":"My father asked me about it and gave me some advice on screaming fighting and mentioned he\u0027s praying for me to be brave.\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I miss Phil. I love him and I want to be around him and talk to him.\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I wish he was here and Im absolutely scared of losing him\n"},{"embeddedObjects":[{"type":"horizontalRuleLine"}]},{"text":"Also the slave like aspects of Alice are coming through\n"},{"text":"but I\u0027d be a damn liar if I said I didn\u0027t enjoy her labour"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":456},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2023-12-03T20:00:14Z
- modifiedDate 2024-04-04T20:34:29Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid 7825AAA3DB2E4F1B9A506AE3D3E7EC38
- starred false
- pinned false
- text '
- ,
- .
- Good day today
- Love this day
- It's 10.38 pm, I've washed my clothes and hung them
- I've washed dishe
- I've washed myself, I'm very clean.
- I slept the whole day, I ate some rice and beans, some sweet potatoes.
- My parents were out, when they came back, they were still really nice.
- I need them to bless the money
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"Good day today\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"Love this day\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"It\u0027s 10.38 pm, I\u0027ve washed my clothes and hung them\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I\u0027ve washed dishe\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I\u0027ve washed myself, I\u0027m very clean.\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I slept the whole day, I ate some rice and beans, some sweet potatoes.\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"My parents were out, when they came back, they were still really nice.\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I need them to bless the money"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":456},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2023-12-02T19:38:17Z
- modifiedDate 2024-04-04T20:35:18Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid A5BE5C83A5894A2A97AAFEBB38651C05
- starred false
- pinned false
- text '
- ,
- .
- - I paid for gummies and picked them up in town.
- - I paid for a wig the yesterday and picked it up today
- - I saw Phil, and I was in a good mood. He looked nice, no laptop. Nice hoodie, we walked and talked. I gave him 3 gummies,
- - I went home with the bus,it was ok. I sat next to a girl who lives around. From hurlingham stage
- - My parents were fuckin nice to me.
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"attributes":{"line":{"checked":false,"header":0,"indentLevel":1,"listStyle":"bulleted"}},"text":"I paid for gummies and picked them up in town.\n"},{"attributes":{"line":{"checked":false,"header":0,"indentLevel":1,"listStyle":"bulleted"}},"text":"I paid for a wig the yesterday and picked it up today\n"},{"attributes":{"line":{"checked":false,"header":0,"indentLevel":1,"listStyle":"bulleted"}},"text":"I saw Phil, and I was in a good mood. He looked nice, no laptop. Nice hoodie, we walked and talked. I gave him 3 gummies,\n"},{"attributes":{"line":{"checked":false,"header":0,"indentLevel":1,"listStyle":"bulleted"}},"text":"I went home with the bus,it was ok. I sat next to a girl who lives around. From hurlingham stage\n"},{"attributes":{"line":{"checked":false,"header":0,"indentLevel":1,"listStyle":"bulleted"}},"text":"My parents were fuckin nice to me."}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":456},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2023-12-01T19:39:31Z
- modifiedDate 2024-04-04T20:35:25Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid AE7F09E97BC6435BA1AA9EBFBD647BEF
- starred false
- pinned false
- text We have a sale so the unit is going for
- Ksh. 2970
- Till number 8719106
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"We have a sale so the unit is going for\n"},{"text":"Ksh. 2970\n"},{"text":"Till number 8719106"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":413},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2023-11-30T19:43:22Z
- modifiedDate 2023-11-30T19:43:42Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid 4ECF496BAD6D43259D897FB014945D09
- starred false
- pinned false
- text '
- ,
- .
- It's the end of the month.
- I got paid my 10k on the 28th.
- I'm already buying gummies and wigs.
- And the minute I got out, I called Phil and mom. Both of them were busy, but I was feeling so mad
- Yet I know that if they did that, I'd be so mad that they acted like I wasn't busy
- Also I hate standing in the parking lot like a \~ waiting 🫠
- 346 for patco and 210 for gummies. 556 already.
- Fuck, I have no sense.
- ***
- And theres no reason to be pissed, she's helping me out
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"It\u0027s the end of the month.\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I got paid my 10k on the 28th.\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I\u0027m already buying gummies and wigs.\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"And the minute I got out, I called Phil and mom. Both of them were busy, but I was feeling so mad\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"Yet I know that if they did that, I\u0027d be so mad that they acted like I wasn\u0027t busy\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"Also I hate standing in the parking lot like a ~ waiting 🫠\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"346 for patco and 210 for gummies. 556 already.\n"},{"text":"Fuck, I have no sense.\n"},{"embeddedObjects":[{"type":"horizontalRuleLine"}]},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"And theres no reason to be pissed, she\u0027s helping me out\n"},{"text":"\n"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":456},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2023-11-30T14:32:38Z
- modifiedDate 2024-04-04T20:35:38Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid BAEF71EB0FA74E40B1D9078523D5BD78
- starred false
- pinned false
- text '
- ,
- .
- period blood and I'm already stinky
- ***
- I got groped on the bus today
- I realized at 7.53 am
- I'm still shook, I'm crying
- I told my mom, I wanted her help.
- I want to be driven everyday or drive to work
- I'm still crying.
- ***
- I don't want to act stupid
- but if I saw what I saw, sitting at the bench calling Phil
- B4 I got an Uber
- then I'm done
- ***
- im going to beg my parents to let me drive
- literal begging, ill go on my knees if i have to
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"period blood and I\u0027m already stinky\n"},{"embeddedObjects":[{"type":"horizontalRuleLine"}]},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I got groped on the bus today\n"},{"text":"I realized at 7.53 am\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I\u0027m still shook, I\u0027m crying\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I told my mom, I wanted her help.\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I want to be driven everyday or drive to work\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I\u0027m still crying.\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"embeddedObjects":[{"type":"horizontalRuleLine"}]},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I don\u0027t want to act stupid\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"but if I saw what I saw, sitting at the bench calling Phil\n"},{"text":"B4 I got an Uber\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"then I\u0027m done\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"embeddedObjects":[{"type":"horizontalRuleLine"}]},{"text":"im going to beg my parents to let me drive\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"literal begging, ill go on my knees if i have to"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":456},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2023-11-29T03:52:34Z
- modifiedDate 2024-04-04T20:36:02Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- location
- region
- center
- longitude 36.8288109
- latitude -1.2853961
- localityName Nairobi
- country Kenya
- longitude 36.8288109
- latitude -1.2853961
- administrativeArea Nairobi County
- placeName PR7H+RGJ Ronald Ngala Street
- address PR7H+RGJ, Ronald Ngala St, Nairobi, Kenya
- weather
- temperatureCelsius 16.33
- windBearing 50
- pressureMB 1014.57
- visibilityKM 19602.65
- relativeHumidity 0
- windSpeedKPH 8.18
- weatherCode PartlyCloudy
- windChillCelsius 0
- v
- uuid 7A5E5BFE5F9C4224BA98EEADB1F12E22
- starred false
- pinned false
- text '
- ,
- .
- I'm badly off bruv
- my womb is acting up.
- and I'm at work, I'm not doing well
- stabby pains, il stay in the loo for 2 hrs
- swear
- ***
- can't believe it's here
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I\u0027m badly off bruv\n"},{"text":"my womb is acting up.\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"and I\u0027m at work, I\u0027m not doing well\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"stabby pains, il stay in the loo for 2 hrs\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"swear\n"},{"embeddedObjects":[{"type":"horizontalRuleLine"}]},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"can\u0027t believe it\u0027s here\n"},{"text":"\n"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":413},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2023-11-28T19:37:26Z
- modifiedDate 2023-11-08T20:21:56Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid 55BAAAC0D7564EDF905D63AEF2BCB0BB
- starred false
- pinned false
- text '
- ,
- .
- your regard for me has made me realize My **disregard for Y**ou
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"your regard for me has made me realize My "},{"attributes":{"bold":true},"text":"disregard for Y"},{"text":"ou"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":456},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2023-11-27T03:50:56Z
- modifiedDate 2024-04-04T20:36:16Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid 543C3347745F4F13A82C27325BEB9AAF
- starred false
- pinned false
- text '
- ,
- .
- iron
- sleep
- ***
- you're right Lillian
- I can't wait to pack up and leave and never interact with you again
- and
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"iron\n"},{"text":"sleep\n"},{"embeddedObjects":[{"type":"horizontalRuleLine"}]},{"text":"you\u0027re right Lillian\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I can\u0027t wait to pack up and leave and never interact with you again\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"and\n"},{"text":"\n"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":456},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2023-11-26T16:51:48Z
- modifiedDate 2024-04-04T20:36:37Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid B5A0856B574C4EE4AE93B1389C0BE34D
- starred false
- pinned false
- text by the end of November
- Jordan will be 1 yr and 8 monts
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"by the end of November\n"},{"text":"Jordan will be 1 yr and 8 monts"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":413},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2023-11-26T13:45:15Z
- modifiedDate 2023-11-26T13:45:37Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid A4F3A33180B7481DA52D58F00AC0DCBB
- starred false
- pinned false
- text '
- ,
- .
- - clean shoes
- - cook mukimo
- - iron clothing
- it's the day of
- guess who won't have any time to herself.
- we gotta go to a wedding with the ogots
- I've barely put my clothes in the machine, haven't had breakfast
- haven't eaten any good thing at this house for days
- no veg no nothing
- I'm tweaking
- and i. thought I. was agrown up.
- who can make their own schedules **...NEVER!!**
- > Nigella, every time you get weak, and you start thinking of the washing machine
- > and the water. etc
- > and how you'll cook like nyanya
- > Just **remember** how you never had any time for yourself
- > how going out on Sunday as such a problem. yet meeting with family is allowed
- > remember how this bitches made you cry for wanting to go out on Sunday,
- > remember you crying sniffling in the kitchen when your mother threatened to beat you with a mwiko for having a dissenting opinion
- > remember! when she made a ruckus and screamt at you in Kisumu for Not washing an ugali pot when it was your brother's turn. remember all that when you feel like you can't stay behind on Monday or Tuesday because it would be too hard.
- > I
- > remember my dad calling me disgusting when I answered
- > and him calling me a parasite for not cooking food for anyone in the house when it's a full able bodied house
- > .
- > remember all that when he tries to act nice and caring
- > ,
- > bitches don't like you. and you can't act like they do
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"attributes":{"line":{"checked":false,"header":0,"indentLevel":1,"listStyle":"bulleted"}},"text":"clean shoes\n"},{"attributes":{"line":{"checked":false,"header":0,"indentLevel":1,"listStyle":"bulleted"}},"text":"cook mukimo\n"},{"attributes":{"line":{"checked":false,"header":0,"indentLevel":1,"listStyle":"bulleted"}},"text":"iron clothing\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"it\u0027s the day of\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"guess who won\u0027t have any time to herself.\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"we gotta go to a wedding with the ogots\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I\u0027ve barely put my clothes in the machine, haven\u0027t had breakfast\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"haven\u0027t eaten any good thing at this house for days\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"no veg no nothing\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I\u0027m tweaking\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"and i. thought I. was agrown up.\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"who can make their own schedules "},{"attributes":{"bold":true},"text":"...NEVER!!\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"attributes":{"line":{"indentLevel":1,"quote":true}},"text":"Nigella, every time you get weak, and you start thinking of the washing machine\n"},{"attributes":{"line":{"indentLevel":1,"quote":true}},"text":"and the water. etc\n"},{"attributes":{"line":{"indentLevel":1,"quote":true}},"text":"and how you\u0027ll cook like nyanya\n"},{"attributes":{"line":{"indentLevel":1,"quote":true}},"text":"Just "},{"attributes":{"bold":true,"line":{"indentLevel":1,"quote":true}},"text":"remember "},{"attributes":{"line":{"indentLevel":1,"quote":true}},"text":"how you never had any time for yourself\n"},{"attributes":{"line":{"indentLevel":1,"quote":true}},"text":"how going out on Sunday as such a problem. yet meeting with family is allowed\n"},{"attributes":{"line":{"indentLevel":1,"quote":true}},"text":"remember how this bitches made you cry for wanting to go out on Sunday,\n"},{"attributes":{"line":{"indentLevel":1,"quote":true}},"text":"remember you crying sniffling in the kitchen when your mother threatened to beat you with a mwiko for having a dissenting opinion\n"},{"attributes":{"line":{"indentLevel":1,"quote":true}},"text":"remember! when she made a ruckus and screamt at you in Kisumu for Not washing an ugali pot when it was your brother\u0027s turn. remember all that when you feel like you can\u0027t stay behind on Monday or Tuesday because it would be too hard.\n"},{"attributes":{"line":{"indentLevel":1,"quote":true}},"text":"I\n"},{"attributes":{"line":{"indentLevel":1,"quote":true}},"text":"remember my dad calling me disgusting when I answered\n"},{"attributes":{"line":{"indentLevel":1,"quote":true}},"text":"and him calling me a parasite for not cooking food for anyone in the house when it\u0027s a full able bodied house\n"},{"attributes":{"line":{"indentLevel":1,"quote":true}},"text":".\n"},{"attributes":{"line":{"indentLevel":1,"quote":true}},"text":"remember all that when he tries to act nice and caring\n"},{"attributes":{"line":{"indentLevel":1,"quote":true}},"text":",\n"},{"attributes":{"line":{"indentLevel":1,"quote":true}},"text":"bitches don\u0027t like you. and you can\u0027t act like they do\n"},{"text":"\n"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":413},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2023-11-25T16:50:55Z
- modifiedDate 2023-11-25T05:10:31Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid CD3CB105EF09472084C18CD5EC43D5AF
- starred false
- pinned false
- text '
- ,
- .
- last day of the week
- fuck yeah
- ***
- going home
- answering yes, lest I be called disgusting
- 👍
- edge and a brush
- ;;;
- just wait for Sunday madam, you can shout at me then
- you can scream the answers out of me babe
- ***
- what a wonderful girl
- so
- ***
- who knew Lillian was so inflammatory
- **wash clothes**
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"last day of the week\n"},{"text":"fuck yeah\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"embeddedObjects":[{"type":"horizontalRuleLine"}]},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"going home\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"answering yes, lest I be called disgusting\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"👍\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"edge and a brush\n"},{"text":";;;\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"just wait for Sunday madam, you can shout at me then\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"you can scream the answers out of me babe\n"},{"embeddedObjects":[{"type":"horizontalRuleLine"}]},{"text":"what a wonderful girl\n"},{"text":"so\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"embeddedObjects":[{"type":"horizontalRuleLine"}]},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"who knew Lillian was so inflammatory\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"attributes":{"bold":true},"text":"wash clothes\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":456},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2023-11-24T02:52:29Z
- modifiedDate 2024-03-16T09:16:17Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid 0CD94ABFCCF94BFFB72858CDC163A409
- starred false
- pinned false
- text .
- ,
- '
- richText {"contents":[{"text":".\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":"\n"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":456},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2023-11-22T09:41:51Z
- modifiedDate 2024-04-04T20:37:35Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid 8767A06D5E474A2983883851F1ABF007
- starred false
- pinned false
- text '
- ,
- .
- I saw Phil yesterday
- guess who looked nice in all black
- ***
- and who had a present
- a real nice chartreuse and navy pair of pants
- ***
- and guess who cried
- it was me bitch
- ***
- and it's now 15.46 pm
- blocker nimepigwa na Kimutai nime shtuka roho ikaruka
- like my heart is still meaning funny.
- I have never received a rejection, certainly not a work rejection
- ***
- Yaani, nimeshtuka
- hadi ata my sleep has vanished.
- I am awake
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"I saw Phil yesterday\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"guess who looked nice in all black\n"},{"embeddedObjects":[{"type":"horizontalRuleLine"}]},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"and who had a present\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"a real nice chartreuse and navy pair of pants\n"},{"embeddedObjects":[{"type":"horizontalRuleLine"}]},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"and guess who cried\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"it was me bitch\n"},{"embeddedObjects":[{"type":"horizontalRuleLine"}]},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"and it\u0027s now 15.46 pm\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"blocker nimepigwa na Kimutai nime shtuka roho ikaruka\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"like my heart is still meaning funny.\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I have never received a rejection, certainly not a work rejection\n"},{"embeddedObjects":[{"type":"horizontalRuleLine"}]},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"Yaani, nimeshtuka\n"},{"text":"hadi ata my sleep has vanished.\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I am awake\n"},{"text":"\n"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":456},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2023-11-21T01:25:58Z
- modifiedDate 2024-04-04T20:37:37Z
- timeZone Indian/Antananarivo
- v
- uuid 915A67592E5045E780CA432432AB3C75
- starred false
- pinned false
- text '
- ,
- .
- a policeman came to work
- gross
- after Friday bruv
- yo
- and my mom in a mood.
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"a policeman came to work\n"},{"text":"gross\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"after Friday bruv\n"},{"text":" yo\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"and my mom in a mood."}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":456},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2023-11-20T06:16:15Z
- modifiedDate 2024-04-04T20:37:59Z
- timeZone Indian/Kerguelen
- v
- uuid D7A8522A444C4FF3812416850BBFDE17
- starred false
- pinned false
- text '
- ,
- .
- i can't believe I got here at 8.03 bich
- can't believe it
- no one's is much, but it feels good
- it's the little things
- ***
- Alice is going today, so we gotta buckle down on the weekends
- ***
- at times like this I swear to god
- I'm thankful to be here and not at home
- with ppl
- interacting
- making friends with chela
- ***
- I've talked to Phil na I'm annoyed
- for no good reason
- just in a bad mood
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"i can\u0027t believe I got here at 8.03 bich\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"can\u0027t believe it\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"no one\u0027s is much, but it feels good\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"it\u0027s the little things\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"embeddedObjects":[{"type":"horizontalRuleLine"}]},{"text":"Alice is going today, so we gotta buckle down on the weekends\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"embeddedObjects":[{"type":"horizontalRuleLine"}]},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"at times like this I swear to god\n"},{"text":"I\u0027m thankful to be here and not at home\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"with ppl\n"},{"text":"interacting\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"making friends with chela\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"embeddedObjects":[{"type":"horizontalRuleLine"}]},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I\u0027ve talked to Phil na I\u0027m annoyed\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"for no good reason\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"just in a bad mood\n"},{"text":"\n"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":413},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2023-11-16T05:11:36Z
- modifiedDate 2023-11-20T06:16:35Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid BBF31C6E217B4F8DA51781B806F6D43B
- starred false
- pinned false
- text '
- ,
- .
- i got to work late and I feel bad
- I need to be in the bus by 6.30
- so leave at 6.15
- ***
- i am happy to be in my room in my parents house amen
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"i got to work late and I feel bad\n"},{"text":"I need to be in the bus by 6.30\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"so leave at 6.15\n"},{"embeddedObjects":[{"type":"horizontalRuleLine"}]},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"i am happy to be in my room in my parents house amen\n"},{"text":"\n"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":456},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2023-11-15T06:07:44Z
- modifiedDate 2024-04-04T20:38:12Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid 7E06D2168A554BFFB94F5216E5C87295
- starred false
- pinned false
- text I want to buy now knowing it will get tougher
- or do I wait it out
- I want
- 1. gummies for 1200
- 2. I want earphones , with strings, for 1000 - 1500. scratch that : headphones for 2,445
- 3. chopsticks for 500
- 4. a wig for 3300
- 5. another wig for 2800
- 6. a cake from naivas an 800- 900
- 7. I want tattoos and piercings
- 8. and healthcare for those tattoos and piercings
- 9. I want dildos and vibrators
- 10. I want VS tools
- 11. I want to go eat out
- 12. and go to malls
- 13. and museums and other Nairobi attractions
- 14. I want to go swimming 500 - 1000
- 15. I want to do my hair 3000 - 4000
- 16. I want l$d tabs 1000
- 17. and wine gummies
- 18. I want clothes. home clothes, work clothes. pants skirts
- 19. I want to buy my brother a football t-shirt
- 20. I want a bonnet 390
- 21. I want headbands at 200
- it's not like I have the money now
- I don't know if I'll have the money then.
- ***
- lastly i want to move out
- it looks like it'll be more than a yr
- ***
- I need to get my shit together
- and save for meds
- real life concerto and shit
- I don't need boys
- I need meds
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"I want to buy now knowing it will get tougher\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"or do I wait it out\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I want\n"},{"attributes":{"line":{"checked":false,"header":0,"indentLevel":1,"listStyle":"numbered"}},"text":"gummies for 1200\n"},{"attributes":{"line":{"checked":false,"header":0,"indentLevel":1,"listStyle":"numbered"}},"text":"I want earphones , with strings, for 1000 - 1500. scratch that : headphones for 2,445\n"},{"attributes":{"line":{"checked":false,"header":0,"indentLevel":1,"listStyle":"numbered"}},"text":"chopsticks for 500\n"},{"attributes":{"line":{"checked":false,"header":0,"indentLevel":1,"listStyle":"numbered"}},"text":"a wig for 3300\n"},{"attributes":{"line":{"checked":false,"header":0,"indentLevel":1,"listStyle":"numbered"}},"text":"another wig for 2800\n"},{"attributes":{"line":{"checked":false,"header":0,"indentLevel":1,"listStyle":"numbered"}},"text":"a cake from naivas an 800- 900\n"},{"attributes":{"line":{"checked":false,"header":0,"indentLevel":1,"listStyle":"numbered"}},"text":"I want tattoos and piercings\n"},{"attributes":{"line":{"checked":false,"header":0,"indentLevel":1,"listStyle":"numbered"}},"text":" and healthcare for those tattoos and piercings\n"},{"attributes":{"line":{"checked":false,"header":0,"indentLevel":1,"listStyle":"numbered"}},"text":"I want dildos and vibrators\n"},{"attributes":{"line":{"checked":false,"header":0,"indentLevel":1,"listStyle":"numbered"}},"text":"I want VS tools\n"},{"attributes":{"line":{"checked":false,"header":0,"indentLevel":1,"listStyle":"numbered"}},"text":"I want to go eat out\n"},{"attributes":{"line":{"checked":false,"header":0,"indentLevel":1,"listStyle":"numbered"}},"text":"and go to malls\n"},{"attributes":{"line":{"checked":false,"header":0,"indentLevel":1,"listStyle":"numbered"}},"text":"and museums and other Nairobi attractions\n"},{"attributes":{"line":{"checked":false,"header":0,"indentLevel":1,"listStyle":"numbered"}},"text":"I want to go swimming 500 - 1000\n"},{"attributes":{"line":{"checked":false,"header":0,"indentLevel":1,"listStyle":"numbered"}},"text":"I want to do my hair 3000 - 4000\n"},{"attributes":{"line":{"checked":false,"header":0,"indentLevel":1,"listStyle":"numbered"}},"text":"I want l$d tabs 1000\n"},{"attributes":{"line":{"checked":false,"header":0,"indentLevel":1,"listStyle":"numbered"}},"text":"and wine gummies\n"},{"attributes":{"line":{"checked":false,"header":0,"indentLevel":1,"listStyle":"numbered"}},"text":"I want clothes. home clothes, work clothes. pants skirts\n"},{"attributes":{"line":{"checked":false,"header":0,"indentLevel":1,"listStyle":"numbered"}},"text":"I want to buy my brother a football t-shirt\n"},{"attributes":{"line":{"checked":false,"header":0,"indentLevel":1,"listStyle":"numbered"}},"text":"I want a bonnet 390\n"},{"attributes":{"line":{"checked":false,"header":0,"indentLevel":1,"listStyle":"numbered"}},"text":"I want headbands at 200\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"it\u0027s not like I have the money now\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I don\u0027t know if I\u0027ll have the money then.\n"},{"embeddedObjects":[{"type":"horizontalRuleLine"}]},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"lastly i want to move out\n"},{"text":"it looks like it\u0027ll be more than a yr\n"},{"embeddedObjects":[{"type":"horizontalRuleLine"}]},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I need to get my shit together\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"and save for meds\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"real life concerto and shit\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I don\u0027t need boys\n"},{"text":"I need meds\n"},{"text":"\n"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":413},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2023-11-14T13:16:46Z
- modifiedDate 2023-11-15T21:03:02Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid F289764D88584FB8A01F6F0E576AA93D
- starred false
- pinned false
- text '
- ,
- .
- I'm run ragged y'all
- I saw a girl with a really pretty upturned nose,
- I'm so tired on the inside.
- grinning and bearing this for the rest of my life, I'd have to kill myself.
- I've never spoken so much.
- all the while I'm deep throatingthis pubic phone, I'm gonna get sick
- my voice will get hoarse.
- I've seen a couple of nursing students.
- they're just tall. nothing much
- one had a deep ass voice. so nice
- that's all
- ***
- had home lunch, it was bomb dot com
- more clients
- ninaongea Hadi nachoka
- ***
- i took 2 shits today
- pebbley at work , unexpected
- long smooth with few pebbles at home
- in Alice's toilet
- I miss Phil
- miss talking to sb
- I don't trust
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"I\u0027m run ragged y\u0027all\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I saw a girl with a really pretty upturned nose,\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I\u0027m so tired on the inside.\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"grinning and bearing this for the rest of my life, I\u0027d have to kill myself.\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I\u0027ve never spoken so much.\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"all the while I\u0027m deep throatingthis pubic phone, I\u0027m gonna get sick\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"my voice will get hoarse.\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I\u0027ve seen a couple of nursing students.\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"they\u0027re just tall. nothing much\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"one had a deep ass voice. so nice\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"that\u0027s all\n"},{"embeddedObjects":[{"type":"horizontalRuleLine"}]},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"had home lunch, it was bomb dot com\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"more clients\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"ninaongea Hadi nachoka\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"embeddedObjects":[{"type":"horizontalRuleLine"}]},{"text":"i took 2 shits today\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"pebbley at work , unexpected\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"long smooth with few pebbles at home\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"in Alice\u0027s toilet\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I miss Phil\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"miss talking to sb\n"},{"text":"I don\u0027t trust\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":413},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2023-11-14T10:14:48Z
- modifiedDate 2023-11-15T21:03:00Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid FB073959F0B147CBB26AC5B03654D927
- starred false
- pinned false
- text I've been having fun conversations with this n
- but I think all iwant is a friend
- really
- like all this energy and falling out of love stuff
- I need to learn how to listen.
- BC I have a rebuttal for each statement
- how do I make it come across that my question of what happens if I cant give you what you want
- like no love words
- then what else
- ***
- great!
- so you're taking it out on me
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"I\u0027ve been having fun conversations with this n\n"},{"text":"but I think all iwant is a friend\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"really\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"like all this energy and falling out of love stuff\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I need to learn how to listen.\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"BC I have a rebuttal for each statement\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"how do I make it come across that my question of what happens if I cant give you what you want\n"},{"text":"like no love words\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"then what else\n"},{"embeddedObjects":[{"type":"horizontalRuleLine"}]},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"great!\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"so you\u0027re taking it out on me\n"},{"text":"\n"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":413},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2023-11-12T20:46:12Z
- modifiedDate 2023-11-15T21:03:00Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid D7433887114B4BE09B6BC5871B85C3FE
- starred false
- pinned false
- text '
- ,
- .
- my mom has thrown out my medicine
- I'm so mad
- she's such a fucker
- I've stolen her money
- ***
- I feel bad about her work but god knows I need to pay for therapy and meds
- like I absolutely refuse to believe there are ppl out there with good moms
- ***
- my dad said I'm disgusting.
- natafuta bucket ya kuosha
- mtu mkubwa kama huyo, bd
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"my mom has thrown out my medicine\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I\u0027m so mad\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"she\u0027s such a fucker\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I\u0027ve stolen her money\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"embeddedObjects":[{"type":"horizontalRuleLine"}]},{"text":"I feel bad about her work but god knows I need to pay for therapy and meds\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"like I absolutely refuse to believe there are ppl out there with good moms\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"embeddedObjects":[{"type":"horizontalRuleLine"}]},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"my dad said I\u0027m disgusting.\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"natafuta bucket ya kuosha\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"mtu mkubwa kama huyo, bd\n"},{"text":"\n"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":456},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2023-11-12T08:11:25Z
- modifiedDate 2024-03-16T09:15:59Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid 4CABFF08EC584CDCAF7B118659293CAA
- starred false
- pinned false
- text '
- ,
- .
- ni Sato
- nikaamka late
- but niko poa
- my cooch is bloody
- I think I'm ovulating
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"ni Sato\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"nikaamka late\n"},{"text":"but niko poa\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"my cooch is bloody\n"},{"text":"I think I\u0027m ovulating"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":456},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2023-11-11T09:27:10Z
- modifiedDate 2024-04-04T20:39:08Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid DA1ADAF863A0448FBA85EAE3DB342B73
- starred false
- pinned false
- text ,
- ,
- .
- arrival at 8.45 am
- 8.13 to 8.23 to 8.40
- ***
- you have to say thank you
- ***
- richText {"contents":[{"text":",\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"arrival at 8.45 am\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"8.13 to 8.23 to 8.40\n"},{"embeddedObjects":[{"type":"horizontalRuleLine"}]},{"text":"you have to say thank you\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"embeddedObjects":[{"type":"horizontalRuleLine"}]},{"text":"\n"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":456},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2023-11-10T05:45:50Z
- modifiedDate 2024-04-04T20:39:13Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid AD5F0E8398784B8BADC3F31F41B6EB49
- starred false
- pinned false
- text '
- ,
- .
- I'm scared
- and I think I'm out of my depth
- ***
- I'm not sure
- if I'll be okay after this
- ***
- it didn't work
- it was a fat speculum
- I'll never get it
- ***
- I also said I wouldn't look into gossip
- but I did
- and I feel like a bum in this house
- and aunt Becky again
- nice
- super duper nice
- but nary a good thought in that head
- ***
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"I\u0027m scared\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"and I think I\u0027m out of my depth\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"embeddedObjects":[{"type":"horizontalRuleLine"}]},{"text":"I\u0027m not sure\n"},{"text":"if I\u0027ll be okay after this\n"},{"embeddedObjects":[{"type":"horizontalRuleLine"}]},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"it didn\u0027t work\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"it was a fat speculum\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I\u0027ll never get it\n"},{"embeddedObjects":[{"type":"horizontalRuleLine"}]},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I also said I wouldn\u0027t look into gossip\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"but I did\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"and I feel like a bum in this house\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"and aunt Becky again\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"nice\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"super duper nice\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"but nary a good thought in that head\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"embeddedObjects":[{"type":"horizontalRuleLine"}]},{"text":"\n"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":456},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2023-11-09T12:04:40Z
- modifiedDate 2024-04-04T20:39:15Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid 608737586E864E6890BFF5C72EDEEA39
- starred false
- pinned false
- text '
- ,
- .
- I admit that it was my fault
- the breakdown in our relationship
- I also do not think you have done anything wrong
- my reaction was my reaction
- when you expressed your feelings about the direction we were heading in
- I admit, I felt a lot hurt
- and I felt as though I was being picked on
- this does not mean that that is what was happening
- I just took it that way
- your emotions are completely valid
- ***
- on my end , I'll be honest
- I felt completely attacked
- I couldn't handle your perspective
- I felt like I couldn't change
- I made the decision to break up
- it felt like the right thing
- my rationale was that
- ' if I can't understand what you need, then I better leave
- so that you find someone who can '
- ***
- when I read your note
- I was a bit shocked
- then some time passed and I thought about it
- and
- I felt truly unable to sit with those feelings of discomfort
- I felt like I was unwanted
- and like I needed to remove myself
- ***
- and we talked for a bit
- and I take responsibility for giving up
- I have realised that about myself
- ***
- you remember when you asked me what does love look like
- it feels like a test
- and I'm hesitant to say I don't know
- I don't know what love looks like
- even for me
- I don't know what it involves
- I feel like I'm failing
- I dont feel like it's enough
- I felt like I needed to work on my own problemsbecause if I truly loved this person
- I would want to change
- and then after a while I realised that I couldn't change for them
- I needed to change for me
- if I loved you enough
- wouldn't I put in the work
- ***
- I would like to talk to you and listen to what you're saying
- ***
- I want to be there for you
- and to support you
- and to love you and be affectionate with you
- what happens when I'm not able to do that though
- is that I feel like I've failed
- and I get in a bit of a funk
- cos what if I'm never able to get out of it
- ***
- and what about the things we aren't compatible about
- pdoA
- children
- eroded trust
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"I admit that it was my fault\n"},{"text":"the breakdown in our relationship\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I also do not think you have done anything wrong\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"my reaction was my reaction\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"when you expressed your feelings about the direction we were heading in\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I admit, I felt a lot hurt\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"and I felt as though I was being picked on\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"this does not mean that that is what was happening\n"},{"text":"I just took it that way\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"your emotions are completely valid\n"},{"embeddedObjects":[{"type":"horizontalRuleLine"}]},{"text":"on my end , I\u0027ll be honest\n"},{"text":"I felt completely attacked\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I couldn\u0027t handle your perspective\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I felt like I couldn\u0027t change\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I made the decision to break up\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"it felt like the right thing\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"my rationale was that\n"},{"text":"\u0027 if I can\u0027t understand what you need, then I better leave\n"},{"text":"so that you find someone who can \u0027\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"embeddedObjects":[{"type":"horizontalRuleLine"}]},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"when I read your note\n"},{"text":"I was a bit shocked\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"then some time passed and I thought about it\n"},{"text":"and\n"},{"text":"I felt truly unable to sit with those feelings of discomfort\n"},{"text":"I felt like I was unwanted\n"},{"text":"and like I needed to remove myself\n"},{"embeddedObjects":[{"type":"horizontalRuleLine"}]},{"text":"and we talked for a bit\n"},{"text":"and I take responsibility for giving up\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I have realised that about myself\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"embeddedObjects":[{"type":"horizontalRuleLine"}]},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"you remember when you asked me what does love look like\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"it feels like a test\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"and I\u0027m hesitant to say I don\u0027t know\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I don\u0027t know what love looks like\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"even for me\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I don\u0027t know what it involves\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I feel like I\u0027m failing\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I dont feel like it\u0027s enough\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I felt like I needed to work on my own problemsbecause if I truly loved this person\n"},{"text":"I would want to change\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"and then after a while I realised that I couldn\u0027t change for them\n"},{"text":"I needed to change for me\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"if I loved you enough\n"},{"text":"wouldn\u0027t I put in the work\n"},{"embeddedObjects":[{"type":"horizontalRuleLine"}]},{"text":"I would like to talk to you and listen to what you\u0027re saying\n"},{"embeddedObjects":[{"type":"horizontalRuleLine"}]},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I want to be there for you\n"},{"text":"and to support you\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"and to love you and be affectionate with you\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"what happens when I\u0027m not able to do that though\n"},{"text":"is that I feel like I\u0027ve failed\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"and I get in a bit of a funk\n"},{"text":"cos what if I\u0027m never able to get out of it\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"embeddedObjects":[{"type":"horizontalRuleLine"}]},{"text":"and what about the things we aren\u0027t compatible about\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"pdoA\n"},{"text":"children\n"},{"text":"eroded trust\n"},{"text":"\n"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":413},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2023-11-04T20:12:41Z
- modifiedDate 2023-11-09T12:04:38Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid 899E2859BCB94C45ACC7B059A54FE06A
- starred false
- pinned false
- text '
- ,
- .
- he called me
- I've been thinking about him all day
- and he called
- fuckin hell
- ***
- I'm a whore
- coz
- why am I willing to tell him things now
- when we were dating I wasn't willing
- but now I'm willing , in order to forge a connection
- he said no meeting and he's right
- it would not serve us
- more tears for me
- fuck
- and I'm really sad I broke up with you
- I take responsibility for reacting badly to you expressing your feelings to me
- and I'm sorry
- am I sad
- - he's left. (I broke up with him)
- - or I've been rejected
- I feel so alone
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"he called me\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I\u0027ve been thinking about him all day\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"and he called\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"fuckin hell\n"},{"embeddedObjects":[{"type":"horizontalRuleLine"}]},{"text":"I\u0027m a whore\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"coz\n"},{"text":"why am I willing to tell him things now\n"},{"text":"when we were dating I wasn\u0027t willing\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"but now I\u0027m willing , in order to forge a connection\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"he said no meeting and he\u0027s right\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"it would not serve us\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"more tears for me\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"fuck\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"and I\u0027m really sad I broke up with you\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I take responsibility for reacting badly to you expressing your feelings to me\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"and I\u0027m sorry\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"am I sad\n"},{"attributes":{"line":{"checked":false,"header":0,"indentLevel":1,"listStyle":"bulleted"}},"text":"he\u0027s left. (I broke up with him)\n"},{"attributes":{"line":{"checked":false,"header":0,"indentLevel":1,"listStyle":"bulleted"}},"text":"or I\u0027ve been rejected\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I feel so alone"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":413},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2023-11-04T19:03:44Z
- modifiedDate 2023-11-04T20:33:48Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid F0D825F00770433A8E25D96FA681B4E9
- starred false
- pinned false
- text '
- ,
- .
- I was cleaning all night
- didn't go to skyway
- didn't accompany mum and Braison in the afternoon back to church
- I'm sad ish
- but not like a dark deep sadness kama jana
- I'm just complacent sad
- like I know better sad
- and
- I wish to call Philip
- but we aren't dating
- because of that
- I can't make demands of his time
- I'm not his and he is not mine
- is it peaceful! yes
- is it also sad and lonely having no one on your side!
- yes
- I wish I hadn't reacted so badly to him expressing his feelings
- but I'm immature
- so I shan't call him this afternoon
- because why would I do that
- even last night
- why would I call him
- he has a life
- his own
- why would I disturb him because I'm lonely
- when I pushed him away
- and I initiated the break up
- why should he comfort me for my insecurities
- when I broke up with him.
- cope!!!
- so I'll sleep and eat and be sad for a bit
- then I'll get my shit together
- I need to be desperate
- for a job
- for my life etc
- ***
- fuck it's sad
- next time
- in 2028
- when I think of dating someone
- I should keep this feeling in mind
- so if I think of losing them
- I know that I'll be sad
- I'm fucking sad yo
- down 👎
- 😔
- I'll get up
- ***
- the absolute desperation I have no talk to someone
- insane
- a different level of sadness
- ***
- talking to my mum gives me anxiety
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"I was cleaning all night\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"didn\u0027t go to skyway\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"didn\u0027t accompany mum and Braison in the afternoon back to church\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I\u0027m sad ish\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"but not like a dark deep sadness kama jana\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I\u0027m just complacent sad\n"},{"text":"like I know better sad\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"and\n"},{"text":"I wish to call Philip\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"but we aren\u0027t dating\n"},{"text":"because of that\n"},{"text":"I can\u0027t make demands of his time\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I\u0027m not his and he is not mine\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"is it peaceful! yes\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"is it also sad and lonely having no one on your side!\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"yes\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I wish I hadn\u0027t reacted so badly to him expressing his feelings\n"},{"text":"but I\u0027m immature\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"so I shan\u0027t call him this afternoon\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"because why would I do that\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"even last night\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"why would I call him\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"he has a life\n"},{"text":"his own\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"why would I disturb him because I\u0027m lonely\n"},{"text":"when I pushed him away\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"and I initiated the break up\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"why should he comfort me for my insecurities\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"when I broke up with him.\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"cope!!!\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"so I\u0027ll sleep and eat and be sad for a bit\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"then I\u0027ll get my shit together\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I need to be desperate\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"for a job\n"},{"text":"for my life etc\n"},{"embeddedObjects":[{"type":"horizontalRuleLine"}]},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"fuck it\u0027s sad\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"next time\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"in 2028\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"when I think of dating someone\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I should keep this feeling in mind\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"so if I think of losing them\n"},{"text":"I know that I\u0027ll be sad\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I\u0027m fucking sad yo\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"down 👎\n"},{"text":"😔\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I\u0027ll get up\n"},{"embeddedObjects":[{"type":"horizontalRuleLine"}]},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"the absolute desperation I have no talk to someone\n"},{"text":"insane\n"},{"text":"a different level of sadness\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"embeddedObjects":[{"type":"horizontalRuleLine"}]},{"text":"talking to my mum gives me anxiety"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":413},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2023-11-04T12:39:15Z
- modifiedDate 2023-11-04T20:33:50Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid 647590C21C804FFFAAA912B3B2D724B4
- starred false
- pinned false
- text '
- ,
- .
- You spent your money, how do you feel?
- ***
- Why Are You Punishing Him?
- I'm not punishing him, there's no time
- It's 18.35
- I gotta leave at 7. Because I'll arrive at 9 pm. If it's too late, 10.
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"You spent your money, how do you feel?\n\n"},{"embeddedObjects":[{"type":"horizontalRuleLine"}]},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"Why Are You Punishing Him?\n\n"},{"text":"I\u0027m not punishing him, there\u0027s no time\n\n\n"},{"text":"It\u0027s 18.35\n\n"},{"text":"I gotta leave at 7. Because I\u0027ll arrive at 9 pm. If it\u0027s too late, 10."}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":413},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2023-11-03T15:34:00Z
- modifiedDate 2023-11-03T15:36:00Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid 6FA3B0601020475AA100844E65B861D3
- starred false
- pinned false
- text '
- ,
- .
- I miss you and I think about you all the time
- you're not gonna read this
- but I think of you non stop
- how to get over you
- how to talk to you
- times we spent together
- how I felt with you
- my life is not the same after I met you
- ***
- I had a bit of an episode
- and I had a big ugly cry with my mum
- I'm sad
- but I've pushed everyone away
- and now I have no one
- ***
- I can say
- I'm not in a good mental space
- gross
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"I miss you and I think about you all the time\n"},{"text":"you\u0027re not gonna read this\n"},{"text":"but I think of you non stop\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"how to get over you\n"},{"text":"how to talk to you\n"},{"text":"times we spent together\n"},{"text":"how I felt with you\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"my life is not the same after I met you\n"},{"embeddedObjects":[{"type":"horizontalRuleLine"}]},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I had a bit of an episode\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"and I had a big ugly cry with my mum\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I\u0027m sad\n"},{"text":"but I\u0027ve pushed everyone away\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"and now I have no one\n"},{"embeddedObjects":[{"type":"horizontalRuleLine"}]},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I can say\n"},{"text":"I\u0027m not in a good mental space\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"gross\n"},{"text":"\n"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":413},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2023-11-02T22:30:57Z
- modifiedDate 2023-11-04T20:34:07Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid 00793E7254EF4F72A5CDF736DDA860F6
- starred false
- pinned false
- text '
- ,
- .
- living with this guy's is killing me
- and there is no one I can talk to
- I made my decision
- by myself.
- I'm still fucking sad tho
- anyway, I have no intention to fraternise with my mother's friends
- so I'll be staying in
- ***
- it's just the hormones
- I'm a bad bitch
- a crazy one as well
- but I'm all good
- just a secondary bout of pain
- I'm all good
- chips at night
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"living with this guy\u0027s is killing me\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"and there is no one I can talk to\n"},{"text":"I made my decision\n"},{"text":"by myself.\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I\u0027m still fucking sad tho\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"anyway, I have no intention to fraternise with my mother\u0027s friends\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"so I\u0027ll be staying in\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"embeddedObjects":[{"type":"horizontalRuleLine"}]},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"it\u0027s just the hormones\n"},{"text":"I\u0027m a bad bitch\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"a crazy one as well\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"but I\u0027m all good\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"just a secondary bout of pain\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I\u0027m all good\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"chips at night"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":413},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2023-11-02T11:55:52Z
- modifiedDate 2023-11-04T20:34:11Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid CE80578D07404D228CFA202974D8E843
- starred false
- pinned false
- text it's my birthday
- happy birthday to me
- I've turned 23
- ![](dayone-moment://2C57FB30F6934186AB1DF606B2442830)
- I made chips for my self last night
- but they can't replace a caring persons love
- I wanted birthday wishes
- fuckin hell
- ***
- I'm in mild pain
- the profen isn't hitting
- and I've checked and rechecked all my apps
- no birthday wishes from anyone
- apart from mum
- but she's being nice
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"it\u0027s my birthday\n"},{"text":"happy birthday to me\n"},{"text":"I\u0027ve turned 23\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"embeddedObjects":[{"identifier":"2C57FB30F6934186AB1DF606B2442830","type":"photo"}]},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I made chips for my self last night\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"but they can\u0027t replace a caring persons love\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I wanted birthday wishes\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"fuckin hell\n"},{"embeddedObjects":[{"type":"horizontalRuleLine"}]},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I\u0027m in mild pain\n"},{"text":"the profen isn\u0027t hitting\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"and I\u0027ve checked and rechecked all my apps\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"no birthday wishes from anyone\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"apart from mum\n"},{"text":"but she\u0027s being nice\n"},{"text":"\n"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":413},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2023-10-31T21:18:25Z
- modifiedDate 2023-11-04T20:34:14Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- location
- region
- center
- longitude 36.9634105
- latitude -1.2591632
- localityName Nairobi
- country Kenya
- longitude 36.9634105
- latitude -1.2591632
- administrativeArea Nairobi County
- placeName Kangundo Road
- address HURLINGHAM QMP ROAD, Kangundo Rd, Nairobi, Kenya
- weather
- temperatureCelsius 17.38
- windBearing 58
- pressureMB 1013.55
- visibilityKM 17257.43
- relativeHumidity 0
- windSpeedKPH 9.35
- weatherCode MostlyCloudy
- windChillCelsius 0
- photos
- identifier 2C57FB30F6934186AB1DF606B2442830
- md5 d8b4d85860514a688c55afbd09062fc6
- type jpg
- fileSize 0
- orderInEntry 0
- height 0
- width 0
- favorite false
- duration 0
- exposureBiasValue 0
- md5Thumbnail d8b4d85860514a688c55afbd09062fc6
- v
- uuid 551B8D2DF92E44F5B456B13C7EF775CE
- starred false
- pinned false
- text '
- ,
- .
- so I'm just done calling Phil
- I was like I have this strong urge to check on him
- and see how he's doing
- it turns out
- I did in for myself
- I'm selfish cunt
- I was calling him for me.
- I really almost cried hearing his voice
- like he just said he's working and I want to bawl
- I'm clearly not over him
- but it's cool
- I'm willing him with all my might
- to have a good life
- one without me in it
- fuck fuck fuck
- Fuck!
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"so I\u0027m just done calling Phil\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I was like I have this strong urge to check on him\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"and see how he\u0027s doing\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"it turns out\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I did in for myself\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I\u0027m selfish cunt\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I was calling him for me.\n"},{"text":"I really almost cried hearing his voice\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"like he just said he\u0027s working and I want to bawl\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I\u0027m clearly not over him\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"but it\u0027s cool\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I\u0027m willing him with all my might\n"},{"text":"to have a good life\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"one without me in it\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"fuck fuck fuck\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"Fuck!\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":413},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2023-10-31T16:50:36Z
- modifiedDate 2023-11-04T20:34:15Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid A65AA82BA112404DB30257FB6B9A528D
- starred false
- pinned false
- text '
- ,
- .
- I sent Phil a text
- it was on snap
- Im lying to myself that it doesn't matter if he doesn't respond
- but I have no one to talk to
- I'm not gonna use him for my emotional problems
- ***
- I think my smooth poop run is over
- I'm a bit sad but ok
- ***
- I'm much sadder
- and I miss him
- I think I'd want him to forgive me
- and not reconcile
- y'all I'm sad
- ***
- on my period with hard poops
- I fumbled the man
- I really did
- and I realised while I was on the toilet getting hemorrhoid
- that I might never see or speak to him
- ever!!!
- like we won't text
- I'll try to call but never speak
- hel me somebody that I used to know
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"I sent Phil a text\n"},{"text":"it was on snap\n"},{"text":"Im lying to myself that it doesn\u0027t matter if he doesn\u0027t respond\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"but I have no one to talk to\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I\u0027m not gonna use him for my emotional problems\n"},{"embeddedObjects":[{"type":"horizontalRuleLine"}]},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I think my smooth poop run is over\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I\u0027m a bit sad but ok\n"},{"embeddedObjects":[{"type":"horizontalRuleLine"}]},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I\u0027m much sadder\n"},{"text":"and I miss him\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I think I\u0027d want him to forgive me\n"},{"text":"and not reconcile\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"y\u0027all I\u0027m sad\n"},{"embeddedObjects":[{"type":"horizontalRuleLine"}]},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"on my period with hard poops\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I fumbled the man\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I really did\n"},{"text":"and I realised while I was on the toilet getting hemorrhoid\n"},{"text":"that I might never see or speak to him\n"},{"text":"ever!!!\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"like we won\u0027t text\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I\u0027ll try to call but never speak\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"hel me somebody that I used to know\n"},{"text":"\n"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":413},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2023-10-30T21:28:42Z
- modifiedDate 2023-11-12T21:25:17Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid C5220847D59E4633977885045CFC50F4
- starred false
- pinned false
- text '
- ,
- .
- I'm feeling a bit despondent
- just a little
- ***
- I had my lunch , it was not the most appetising
- I don't think I'm ready, I really feel like I can't talk , ask questions, put my foot forward.
- i dont want to be seen, perceived as real.
- I don't want to speak, to impress people : I feel as though I'll leave here with nothing
- ***
- mild abdominal pain
- large emotional pain
- I wish he was here
- I realise I took him for granted
- I also noticed I smelled a bit bloody but I didn't know
- > I really feel like
- > I smell really bloody
- > like fr
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"I\u0027m feeling a bit despondent\n"},{"text":"just a little\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"embeddedObjects":[{"type":"horizontalRuleLine"}]},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I had my lunch , it was not the most appetising\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I don\u0027t think I\u0027m ready, I really feel like I can\u0027t talk , ask questions, put my foot forward.\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"i dont want to be seen, perceived as real.\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I don\u0027t want to speak, to impress people : I feel as though I\u0027ll leave here with nothing\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"embeddedObjects":[{"type":"horizontalRuleLine"}]},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"mild abdominal pain\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"large emotional pain\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I wish he was here\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I realise I took him for granted\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I also noticed I smelled a bit bloody but I didn\u0027t know\n"},{"attributes":{"line":{"indentLevel":1,"quote":true}},"text":"I really feel like\n"},{"attributes":{"line":{"indentLevel":1,"quote":true}},"text":"I smell really bloody\n"},{"attributes":{"line":{"indentLevel":1,"quote":true}},"text":"like fr\n\n"},{"text":"\n"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":413},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2023-10-30T08:20:58Z
- modifiedDate 2023-11-04T20:34:33Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid 60F25BE79D794700A3A602F8BE68AB12
- starred false
- pinned false
- text the end
- end of
- end of an era
- I'm so sorry I am not there for you
- I am so so so sorry
- my toxic trait is that idont want to work on it
- I don't want to be faced with the uncomfortableness
- ' you will repeat the pattern until you heal the pain that triggers it.'
- I'm sorry I wasn't willing to work on it
- I really am
- but at least I don't have to think about my vaginismus
- # forever alone
- and remember that one time that he was really mad at me for not wanting to take my bra off little bit pushy
- so fuck that noise
- but I also remember how kind he was to me
- how he called me on that one day when I went home early
- how he gave me sweets ( my first Reese's piece ever ) and paid for my meals, like at zaran
- and the date at the library in sarit
- and drinking liquor with him
- and puking in town and sleeping on his lap
- and going to the museum
- and going to kitchenette
- and hanging out and getting drinks at that nice restaurant that I couldn't go to alone
- ***
- it's Monday
- but the feelings are hitting right in the feels
- I wanna apologise so bad
- he was musty
- as if that will get me over him faster.
- and remember when he wanted you to take off your bra !! real fast
- I want a friend
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"the end\n"},{"text":"end of\n"},{"text":"end of an era\n"},{"text":"I\u0027m so sorry I am not there for you\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I am so so so sorry\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"my toxic trait is that idont want to work on it\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I don\u0027t want to be faced with the uncomfortableness\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\u0027 you will repeat the pattern until you heal the pain that triggers it.\u0027\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I\u0027m sorry I wasn\u0027t willing to work on it\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I really am\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"but at least I don\u0027t have to think about my vaginismus\n"},{"text":"# forever alone\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"and remember that one time that he was really mad at me for not wanting to take my bra off little bit pushy\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"so fuck that noise\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"but I also remember how kind he was to me\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"how he called me on that one day when I went home early\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"how he gave me sweets ( my first Reese\u0027s piece ever ) and paid for my meals, like at zaran\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"and the date at the library in sarit\n"},{"text":"and drinking liquor with him\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"and puking in town and sleeping on his lap\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"and going to the museum\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"and going to kitchenette\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"and hanging out and getting drinks at that nice restaurant that I couldn\u0027t go to alone\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"embeddedObjects":[{"type":"horizontalRuleLine"}]},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"it\u0027s Monday\n"},{"text":"but the feelings are hitting right in the feels\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I wanna apologise so bad\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"he was musty\n"},{"text":"as if that will get me over him faster.\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"and remember when he wanted you to take off your bra !! real fast\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I want a friend\n"},{"text":"\n"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":413},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2023-10-29T18:30:59Z
- modifiedDate 2023-11-04T20:34:59Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid EFC8D3399D2E47A8886FEBA7ACDDF449
- starred false
- pinned false
- text '
- ,
- .
- I know I miss him but I know I miss what he used to say to me and what he used to do for me
- but in the meantime, I miss him
- and I miss someone to say good morning to
- ***
- do I miss him or was I bored.
- I think I miss him
- I'm saying to myself I loved talking to him and knowing what he was up to
- but I really know I'd get annoyed to ask him about his morning and how he woke up
- I don't know if I can love someone
- because why didn't I love him and what does love look like for me
- I think it's ppl being nice to me
- ***
- i am just bored and slightly anxious
- bored bored bored
- he's ok
- he is fine
- I'm not ok
- we havent spoken
- I havent texted
- I don't have that kind of access anymore
- I wanna ask what he is up to
- I'm needy
- I'm very mildly anxious
- but ill be good, he will be good
- it's fine
- ***
- I'm calling people hoping they don't pick up the phone
- I'm considering saying I'm depressed
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"I know I miss him but I know I miss what he used to say to me and what he used to do for me\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"but in the meantime, I miss him\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"and I miss someone to say good morning to\n"},{"embeddedObjects":[{"type":"horizontalRuleLine"}]},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"do I miss him or was I bored.\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I think I miss him\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I\u0027m saying to myself I loved talking to him and knowing what he was up to\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"but I really know I\u0027d get annoyed to ask him about his morning and how he woke up\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I don\u0027t know if I can love someone\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"because why didn\u0027t I love him and what does love look like for me\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I think it\u0027s ppl being nice to me\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"embeddedObjects":[{"type":"horizontalRuleLine"}]},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"i am just bored and slightly anxious\n"},{"text":"bored bored bored\n"},{"text":"he\u0027s ok\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"he is fine\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I\u0027m not ok\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"we havent spoken\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I havent texted\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I don\u0027t have that kind of access anymore\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I wanna ask what he is up to\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I\u0027m needy\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I\u0027m very mildly anxious\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"but ill be good, he will be good\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"it\u0027s fine\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"embeddedObjects":[{"type":"horizontalRuleLine"}]},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I\u0027m calling people hoping they don\u0027t pick up the phone\n"},{"text":"I\u0027m considering saying I\u0027m depressed\n"},{"text":"\n"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":413},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2023-10-29T04:43:29Z
- modifiedDate 2023-11-04T20:35:17Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid B3FCB0D59D9849F0BCCB0EFCF2DD6573
- starred false
- pinned false
- text '
- ,
- .
- the song going through my head is ' I think I'm just about over being your girlfriend '
- ' I'm leaving '
- I feel really conflicted and torn up.
- and guilty
- like I am doing sth wrongly
- idk how to explain
- I'm sad
- I'm a conflict pursuant and conflict avoidant at the same time
- I wanna fight with Lillian
- but I don't wanna throw hands
- ***
- I do miss Philip
- I'd love to say good morning
- but that's meaningless patter
- we need the romance
- ***
- I think kepher needs to be shot
- tied up to a stake and shot
- like a mass traitor shooting
- and I don't have obedience in me for real
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"the song going through my head is \u0027 I think I\u0027m just about over being your girlfriend \u0027\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\u0027 I\u0027m leaving \u0027\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I feel really conflicted and torn up.\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"and guilty\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"like I am doing sth wrongly\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"idk how to explain\n"},{"text":"I\u0027m sad\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I\u0027m a conflict pursuant and conflict avoidant at the same time\n"},{"text":"I wanna fight with Lillian\n"},{"text":"but I don\u0027t wanna throw hands\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"embeddedObjects":[{"type":"horizontalRuleLine"}]},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I do miss Philip\n"},{"text":"I\u0027d love to say good morning\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"but that\u0027s meaningless patter\n"},{"text":"we need the romance\n\n\n"},{"embeddedObjects":[{"type":"horizontalRuleLine"}]},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I think kepher needs to be shot\n"},{"text":"tied up to a stake and shot \n"},{"text":"like a mass traitor shooting\n\n\n"},{"text":"and I don\u0027t have obedience in me for real"},{"text":"\n"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":413},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2023-10-28T06:33:12Z
- modifiedDate 2023-10-28T07:58:53Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid 784F4D9F58BA47BB8B5DDAB9E454D88F
- starred false
- pinned false
- text '
- ,
- .
- why are you scared of being alone
- you were alone before
- you'll be alone again
- you are not providing each other with any value
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"why are you scared of being alone\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"you were alone before\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"you\u0027ll be alone again\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"you are not providing each other with any value"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":413},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2023-10-27T06:31:49Z
- modifiedDate 2023-10-30T03:14:16Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid 6A5F2664AD484D01B15472B71FFCED5D
- starred false
- pinned false
- text '
- ,
- .
- this is really not my home
- I live here but it's not my home
- why are we painting
- picking and choosing colours
- when I was in form ?? , mi nilifika, nikapata mumepaint
- alafu saa hii ndio unasema ati hizi colours hazifai
- ***
- I took an extra loooong and large poop
- it felt like shit was being extruded from me
- still clean, to problems there
- but extra extra extra long
- it flooded up twice
- ***
- also Philip feels that the romance has faded from our relationship
- so I might not have a boyfriend by my birthday
- ***
- I don't trust you
- I don't have a reason not to but I don't
- I can't provide that for you, I think you should get another girl
- I don't wanna say it
- it grosses me out
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"this is really not my home\n"},{"text":"I live here but it\u0027s not my home\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"why are we painting\n"},{"text":"picking and choosing colours\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"when I was in form ?? , mi nilifika, nikapata mumepaint\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"alafu saa hii ndio unasema ati hizi colours hazifai\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"embeddedObjects":[{"type":"horizontalRuleLine"}]},{"text":"I took an extra loooong and large poop\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"it felt like shit was being extruded from me\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"still clean, to problems there\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"but extra extra extra long\n"},{"text":"it flooded up twice\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"embeddedObjects":[{"type":"horizontalRuleLine"}]},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"also Philip feels that the romance has faded from our relationship\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"so I might not have a boyfriend by my birthday\n"},{"embeddedObjects":[{"type":"horizontalRuleLine"}]},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I don\u0027t trust you\n"},{"text":"I don\u0027t have a reason not to but I don\u0027t\n"},{"text":"I can\u0027t provide that for you, I think you should get another girl\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I don\u0027t wanna say it\n"},{"text":"it grosses me out\n"},{"text":"\n"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":413},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2023-10-26T06:03:36Z
- modifiedDate 2023-11-12T20:33:44Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid 17E757C7494C4B669A0F85900B6BAF99
- starred false
- pinned false
- text '
- ,
- .
- I have realised after talking to my mother
- that I have no intention of doing all that shit
- no intention of interview prep
- of dressing nicely
- of doing anything with my hair
- of letting that fuckin cunt buy me clothes so she can come round later talking about oh I bought you abcd so you have to do what I say
- of taking Braison to school
- none of that shit
- I plan to sleep
- eat
- sleep
- ***
- I honestly made a mistake there
- after she sat downstairs and I let her have the stage
- she blabbed off
- I *fully more*like partly realise that I am resistant to a bunch of things purely because Lillian suggested them.
- and she's punished me for wanting those same things in the past
- so as far as I am concerned, shame on you and fuck off
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"I have realised after talking to my mother\n"},{"text":"that I have no intention of doing all that shit\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"no intention of interview prep\n"},{"text":"of dressing nicely\n"},{"text":"of doing anything with my hair\n"},{"text":"of letting that fuckin cunt buy me clothes so she can come round later talking about oh I bought you abcd so you have to do what I say\n"},{"text":"of taking Braison to school\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"none of that shit\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I plan to sleep\n"},{"text":"eat\n"},{"text":"sleep\n"},{"embeddedObjects":[{"type":"horizontalRuleLine"}]},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I honestly made a mistake there\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"after she sat downstairs and I let her have the stage\n"},{"text":"she blabbed off\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I "},{"attributes":{"italic":true},"text":"fully more "},{"text":"like partly realise that I am resistant to a bunch of things purely because Lillian suggested them.\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"and she\u0027s punished me for wanting those same things in the past\n"},{"text":"so as far as I am concerned, shame on you and fuck off\n"},{"text":"\n"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":413},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2023-10-25T10:14:55Z
- modifiedDate 2023-11-12T20:34:43Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid 6B5B82BEB693488FBB9D1A164122C15A
- starred false
- pinned false
- text '
- ,
- .
- .
- I feel pretty fucking vindictful to be honest
- after asking and getting a no
- ( what is a ' I don't know ' ) but. a no
- I got mad but I have things to do so we move on.
- then I start travelling, to and fro
- and I give in and get an Uber. it sucks right
- a 3 HR trip
- I might have well , gone to town and gotten a bus to imara daima
- walking all the way from the gate to the kra office
- I got so mad And vindictive
- cos why
- you were never on my side. never.
- fuckin hell
- so here I am.
- I'm even contemplating a bike.
- or a car
- just anything so I can move from place a to place b
- directly
- like fr
- keep your fucking cars
- and when I leave , I hope they fuckin rot
- I hope you find some fuckin heirs
- I'm so annoyed
- ***
- im home
- I saw a funny tweet
- at Sameer, I lost my phone volume button
- and I met mums friend who was like , kwani what stories do you chat with your mom ( none)
- s
- and what is kepter of use for
- and
- some Luo Uber guy scammed me
- and I had to walk for a while then wait for a mat
- and it was nasty
- four to a seat and some uggo tried to talk to me
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I feel pretty fucking vindictful to be honest\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"after asking and getting a no\n"},{"text":"( what is a \u0027 I don\u0027t know \u0027 ) but. a no\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I got mad but I have things to do so we move on.\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"then I start travelling, to and fro\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"and I give in and get an Uber. it sucks right\n"},{"text":"a 3 HR trip\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I might have well , gone to town and gotten a bus to imara daima\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"walking all the way from the gate to the kra office\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I got so mad And vindictive\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"cos why\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"you were never on my side. never.\n"},{"text":"fuckin hell\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"so here I am.\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I\u0027m even contemplating a bike.\n"},{"text":"or a car\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"just anything so I can move from place a to place b\n"},{"text":"directly\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"like fr\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"keep your fucking cars\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"and when I leave , I hope they fuckin rot\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I hope you find some fuckin heirs\n"},{"text":"I\u0027m so annoyed\n"},{"embeddedObjects":[{"type":"horizontalRuleLine"}]},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"im home\n"},{"text":"I saw a funny tweet\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"at Sameer, I lost my phone volume button\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"and I met mums friend who was like , kwani what stories do you chat with your mom ( none)\n"},{"text":"s\n"},{"text":"and what is kepter of use for\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"and\n"},{"text":"some Luo Uber guy scammed me\n"},{"text":"and I had to walk for a while then wait for a mat\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"and it was nasty\n"},{"text":"four to a seat and some uggo tried to talk to me\n"},{"text":"\n"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":413},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2023-10-23T12:44:35Z
- modifiedDate 2023-11-12T20:35:21Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid 1A29F53C923F4104A34A19143F8A511C
- starred false
- pinned false
- text '
- ,
- .
- my uncle visited, it was good
- he was encouraging and nice to my family
- I told my dad my plans
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"my uncle visited, it was good\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"he was encouraging and nice to my family\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I told my dad my plans"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":413},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2023-10-21T22:53:24Z
- modifiedDate 2023-10-23T12:51:08Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid D8103B6D0D5944C1B2540C26493FD529
- starred false
- pinned false
- text '
- ,
- .
- I'm disrespecting my parents
- it needs to stop
- nowww!
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"I\u0027m disrespecting my parents\n"},{"text":"it needs to stop\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"nowww!"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":413},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2023-10-21T13:41:40Z
- modifiedDate 2023-10-23T12:51:12Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid E111CAB3962443BD927D14C50FCF1B45
- starred false
- pinned false
- text '
- ,
- .
- i, today, masturbated
- and immediately wondered if this is an addiction.
- I really want to make an app that tracks days
- habit tracker
- sober tracker
- sth
- I felt so bad yesterday, like disgusting
- how do I have no fucking discipline
- I need to stop saying " I don't want to do this"
- and start doing things because I need to do
- I need to that for me.
- ***
- maybe it's me
- but I'm so fuckin anxious
- my stomach is turnin, not too much but enough.
- is this my intuition, I don't know
- like my stomach is twisting, my oesophagus is dropping
- what does this mean for me.
- or am I just a untrusting ass b
- wouldn't know
- ***
- blood is coming out of my coochie so hard
- like my literal waginal canal
- that I am wondering if the silicon body and metal/plastic rod inside could be causing me micro tears
- cause wtf
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"i, today, masturbated\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"and immediately wondered if this is an addiction.\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I really want to make an app that tracks days\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"habit tracker\n"},{"text":"sober tracker\n"},{"text":"sth\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I felt so bad yesterday, like disgusting\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"how do I have no fucking discipline\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I need to stop saying \" I don\u0027t want to do this\"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"and start doing things because I need to do\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I need to that for me.\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"embeddedObjects":[{"type":"horizontalRuleLine"}]},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"maybe it\u0027s me\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"but I\u0027m so fuckin anxious\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"my stomach is turnin, not too much but enough.\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"is this my intuition, I don\u0027t know\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"like my stomach is twisting, my oesophagus is dropping\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"what does this mean for me.\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"or am I just a untrusting ass b\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"wouldn\u0027t know\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"embeddedObjects":[{"type":"horizontalRuleLine"}]},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"blood is coming out of my coochie so hard\n"},{"text":"like my literal waginal canal\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"that I am wondering if the silicon body and metal/plastic rod inside could be causing me micro tears\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"cause wtf"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":456},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2023-10-20T19:53:15Z
- modifiedDate 2024-03-16T09:16:08Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid 030E87219AD64F838EA8AF986AE09EA0
- starred false
- pinned false
- text '
- ,
- .
- I'm disappointed fuck no
- disgusted with myself today
- kra no
- mavenpick no
- fanya vitu immediately
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"I\u0027m disappointed fuck no\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"disgusted with myself today\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"kra no\n"},{"text":"mavenpick no\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"fanya vitu immediately"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":456},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2023-10-19T10:46:15Z
- modifiedDate 2024-04-05T05:42:03Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid 11F4F86F00744B06A14F95B7F7B620C8
- starred false
- pinned false
- text '
- ,
- .
- Lillian tried to talk to me yesterday
- I was fucking disgusted
- dad called, what the fuck could you possibly want to talk about
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"Lillian tried to talk to me yesterday\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I was fucking disgusted\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"dad called, what the fuck could you possibly want to talk about"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":456},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2023-10-18T10:21:34Z
- modifiedDate 2024-04-05T05:42:15Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid DA5EA436BCB34E379A3CD452556DF5A0
- starred false
- pinned false
- text ',.
- ',.
- ',.
- technically it's Tuesday
- but on my momma it feels like thursday
- why is my momma acting like we friends now
- after her and my husband cussed me out on Sunday
- I think y'all can rot in hell
- I'm praying on your downfall
- I Hope You Die
- capital d
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"\u0027,.\n"},{"text":"\u0027,.\n"},{"text":"\u0027,.\n"},{"text":"technically it\u0027s Tuesday\n"},{"text":"but on my momma it feels like thursday\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"why is my momma acting like we friends now\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"after her and my husband cussed me out on Sunday\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I think y\u0027all can rot in hell\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I\u0027m praying on your downfall\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I Hope You Die\n"},{"text":" capital d"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":456},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2023-10-17T02:19:13Z
- modifiedDate 2024-04-05T05:42:22Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid 172157D2A2D04F82A6B179827224434B
- starred false
- pinned false
- text '
- ,
- .
- I've woken up today
- then after taking literally two steps ,down and back
- horrible abdominal cramps
- like is my womb feeling itself out
- last so little
- on the pooper just in case, and it's a bowel movement
- and my bowels were moving and grooving
- and that's literally it y'all
- I'm not under the weather
- my poop just wanted to come out
- ***
- so Sato
- ***
- I'm setting up boundaries
- so in the future we can be estranged
- life is very give and take
- you care about things I care about
- I care about things you care about or not
- and I'm tired of pretending to be a good daughter
- tired of masking
- in other good news
- at least dad will get off his fucking kindness horse
- like I didn't believe it for one second
- but I enjoyed the fruits of it
- so at least now we can be as we were before
- nothing
- also you can't force someone open
- like an oyster, crack them open
- I know life will be rough and tough
- and I want to see if that will change me
- ***
- and my mom expects that I'll talk to her but she can kick rocks
- I have no intention of that
- and she also mentioned how, the minute I let a man touch me, I will feel great
- and if I let him have sex with me, I'll get pregnant or a disease
- let's absolutely pretend I'm not interested as well
- and just until today yk
- I made fun
- but my mother really has a mental illness
- like, she is insane
- and I inherited that shit
- why would you sit there and instigate
- and try to gaslight my actions and try to turn them around to mock me, forgive me from responding appropriately to my mockery
- and for someone to own me over ice-cream
- that's just a load of crap
- and I really did want to make an effort but I'm over it
- I don't give a shit
- ***
- I still genuinely so fucking vengeful
- I think you all can die
- and for the shit you said to me
- we're fucking enmeshed
- and if you use that excuse one more time
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"I\u0027ve woken up today\n"},{"text":"then after taking literally two steps ,down and back\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"horrible abdominal cramps\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"like is my womb feeling itself out\n"},{"text":"last so little\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"on the pooper just in case, and it\u0027s a bowel movement\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"and my bowels were moving and grooving\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"and that\u0027s literally it y\u0027all\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I\u0027m not under the weather\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"my poop just wanted to come out\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"embeddedObjects":[{"type":"horizontalRuleLine"}]},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"so Sato\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"embeddedObjects":[{"type":"horizontalRuleLine"}]},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I\u0027m setting up boundaries\n"},{"text":"so in the future we can be estranged\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"life is very give and take\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"you care about things I care about\n"},{"text":"I care about things you care about or not\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"and I\u0027m tired of pretending to be a good daughter\n"},{"text":"tired of masking\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"in other good news\n"},{"text":"at least dad will get off his fucking kindness horse\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"like I didn\u0027t believe it for one second\n"},{"text":"but I enjoyed the fruits of it\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"so at least now we can be as we were before\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"nothing\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"also you can\u0027t force someone open\n"},{"text":"like an oyster, crack them open\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I know life will be rough and tough\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"and I want to see if that will change me\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"embeddedObjects":[{"type":"horizontalRuleLine"}]},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"and my mom expects that I\u0027ll talk to her but she can kick rocks\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I have no intention of that\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"and she also mentioned how, the minute I let a man touch me, I will feel great\n"},{"text":"and if I let him have sex with me, I\u0027ll get pregnant or a disease\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"let\u0027s absolutely pretend I\u0027m not interested as well\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"and just until today yk\n"},{"text":"I made fun\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"but my mother really has a mental illness\n"},{"text":"like, she is insane\n"},{"text":"and I inherited that shit\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"why would you sit there and instigate\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"and try to gaslight my actions and try to turn them around to mock me, forgive me from responding appropriately to my mockery\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"and for someone to own me over ice-cream\n"},{"text":"that\u0027s just a load of crap\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"and I really did want to make an effort but I\u0027m over it\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I don\u0027t give a shit\n"},{"embeddedObjects":[{"type":"horizontalRuleLine"}]},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I still genuinely so fucking vengeful\n"},{"text":"I think you all can die\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"and for the shit you said to me\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"we\u0027re fucking enmeshed\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"and if you use that excuse one more time\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":413},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2023-10-15T07:05:49Z
- modifiedDate 2023-10-17T02:19:11Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid FC47FDE2D37B404C841610D510E00E5E
- starred false
- pinned false
- text '
- ,
- .
- I am having a womb sth
- I had 2 pretty weird internal cramps
- like a muscle was moving around or some shit
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"I am having a womb sth\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I had 2 pretty weird internal cramps\n"},{"text":"like a muscle was moving around or some shit"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":456},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2023-10-13T13:46:01Z
- modifiedDate 2024-04-05T05:43:02Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- location
- region
- center
- longitude 36.9633665
- latitude -1.2590383
- localityName Nairobi
- country Kenya
- longitude 36.9633665
- latitude -1.2590383
- administrativeArea Nairobi County
- placeName PXR7+GJ8
- address PXR7+GJ8, Nairobi, Kenya
- v
- uuid 29951EDD5764488495BFBD18202AF6FA
- starred false
- pinned false
- text '
- ,
- .
- it's a woman
- it's a woman thank god
- ***
- it was a woman but it wasn't any better
- I'm actually still effin embarrassed
- wah
- I need to get money and go to doctors paid to have a bedside manner
- ***
- I was just embarrassed with my thighs splayed out like that and she was unhappy ? w me
- eh
- so I came home
- jilled twice
- slept for long
- got productive for the last 2 hrs
- ***
- I love being naked
- not just any naked
- washed clean and naked and lotioned and dry
- and dry and toasty
- I feel so good
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"it\u0027s a woman\n"},{"text":"it\u0027s a woman thank god\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"embeddedObjects":[{"type":"horizontalRuleLine"}]},{"text":"it was a woman but it wasn\u0027t any better\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I\u0027m actually still effin embarrassed\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"wah\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I need to get money and go to doctors paid to have a bedside manner\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"embeddedObjects":[{"type":"horizontalRuleLine"}]},{"text":"I was just embarrassed with my thighs splayed out like that and she was unhappy ? w me\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"eh\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"so I came home\n"},{"text":"jilled twice\n"},{"text":"slept for long\n"},{"text":"got productive for the last 2 hrs\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"embeddedObjects":[{"type":"horizontalRuleLine"}]},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I love being naked\n"},{"text":"not just any naked\n"},{"text":"washed clean and naked and lotioned and dry\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"and dry and toasty\n"},{"text":"I feel so good"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":456},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2023-10-11T05:55:35Z
- modifiedDate 2024-04-05T05:43:07Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- location
- region
- center
- longitude 36.9633665
- latitude -1.2590383
- localityName Nairobi
- country Kenya
- longitude 36.9633665
- latitude -1.2590383
- administrativeArea Nairobi County
- placeName PXR7+GJ8
- address PXR7+GJ8, Nairobi, Kenya
- v
- uuid F78089A8C97143BA8CA0792348C29237
- starred false
- pinned false
- text '
- ,
- .
- dumbest take alive : don't trust vaccines
- even polio vaccines
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"dumbest take alive : don\u0027t trust vaccines\n"},{"text":" even polio vaccines"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":413},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2023-10-10T11:49:07Z
- modifiedDate 2023-10-10T11:49:46Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid 0BCFFACAC3504ECC997E6DD8E2A0358D
- starred false
- pinned false
- text '
- ,
- .
- I'm rambling but my stomach is off ish
- minorly though
- my hair is so gaddamned itchy
- all this after eating meat
- on a date with Phil
- before he went on a date with Hawa
- so , I fucked up
- I really did
- I said id be vegan,
- then I jumped straight into that meat
- and it was subpar chicken as well, tbh
- bad bad
- ***
- I've eaten : cabbage, chapo, stew
- it's vegan as hell
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"I\u0027m rambling but my stomach is off ish\n"},{"text":"minorly though\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"my hair is so gaddamned itchy\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"all this after eating meat\n"},{"text":"on a date with Phil\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"before he went on a date with Hawa\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"so , I fucked up\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I really did\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I said id be vegan,\n"},{"text":"then I jumped straight into that meat\n"},{"text":"and it was subpar chicken as well, tbh\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"bad bad\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"embeddedObjects":[{"type":"horizontalRuleLine"}]},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I\u0027ve eaten : cabbage, chapo, stew\n"},{"text":"it\u0027s vegan as hell\n"},{"text":"\n"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":413},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2023-10-09T08:54:40Z
- modifiedDate 2023-10-10T11:49:17Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid FB5634800F914AA6B8623C6B6BDCFF93
- starred false
- pinned false
- text '
- ,
- .
- I have a confession
- even before you forgot your keys
- you've noticed that I am reluctant to come to your place
- this is because I am scared to come over
- I know what will happen
- Inevitably,We will roll around on your bed
- and it's not that I am against that
- quite the opposite
- I love you
- And I love spending time with you
- and being with you in person is pretty nice
- It really reinforces how much I miss spending time with you
- I forget all the things that bother me
- It's nice
- But back to the topic of your house
- I don't think I can go to your place, then leave and go home to my parents house
- Id feel guilty
- I did it before in November and December
- And I really loved spending that time with you
- But my parents focus was not on me
- And genuinely now,,I feel like there is some focus on me to do sth
- And I don't want to deny that part of myself with you
- If we'd gone today, barring your keys
- I'd go home and my rents would be on me,
- Asking about this that
- It would get to me
- It will get better for us
- I swear
- Xoxoxoxoxoxo
- 😘
- ***
- this are my true feelings
- however
- hawa alisema 😅
- if the bills are paid
- then the bills are paid mamen
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"I have a confession\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"even before you forgot your keys\n"},{"text":"you\u0027ve noticed that I am reluctant to come to your place\n"},{"text":"this is because I am scared to come over\n"},{"text":"I know what will happen\n"},{"text":"Inevitably,We will roll around on your bed\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"and it\u0027s not that I am against that\n"},{"text":"quite the opposite\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I love you\n"},{"text":"And I love spending time with you\n"},{"text":"and being with you in person is pretty nice\n"},{"text":"It really reinforces how much I miss spending time with you\n"},{"text":"I forget all the things that bother me\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"It\u0027s nice\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"But back to the topic of your house\n"},{"text":"I don\u0027t think I can go to your place, then leave and go home to my parents house\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"Id feel guilty\n"},{"text":"I did it before in November and December\n"},{"text":"And I really loved spending that time with you\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"But my parents focus was not on me\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"And genuinely now,,I feel like there is some focus on me to do sth\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"And I don\u0027t want to deny that part of myself with you\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"If we\u0027d gone today, barring your keys\n"},{"text":"I\u0027d go home and my rents would be on me,\n"},{"text":"Asking about this that\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"It would get to me\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"It will get better for us\n"},{"text":"I swear\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"Xoxoxoxoxoxo\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"😘\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"embeddedObjects":[{"type":"horizontalRuleLine"}]},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"this are my true feelings\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"however\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"hawa alisema 😅\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"if the bills are paid\n"},{"text":"then the bills are paid mamen\n"},{"text":"\n"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":413},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2023-10-08T14:42:26Z
- modifiedDate 2023-10-10T06:54:21Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid 52BE4F785896434A97AB825BBB37D0A8
- starred false
- pinned false
- text '
- ,
- .
- Jesus
- I'm a shit girl friend
- I go downstairs
- knowing one of my laptops iko apo
- obvs niko kaa chini hadi saa hii
- knowing full well nilikuwa niongee na Phil
- nikalenga, sikumuongelesha
- 9
- watu wakamaliza kukula
- nikaenda chini, kama Kawa mkate, chai, pineapple ilikuwa na brown spots mob
- na orange
- zero fuckin protein
- not as a joke
- not a single gram, no egg nothing
- kurudi apa ma 1 am
- Phil ame sms, text na call
- alisahau funguo naks
- sijacomfort msee, sijamuongelesha ata, kitu tu nikukula, kuwatch na kusahau watu
- yaani I am there for nobody, nobody will be there for me
- so ata sijui koma amelala wapi, amekaa wapi ameenda wapi atatumiwa
- alivunja lock ama mlango, what's up
- ***
- after going to see mum
- she's like who are you seeing, which friends are these you don't know them
- I feel like she was trying to give me a hard time,
- and I honestly don't know how to say 'nicely ' to her
- that I genuinely would have gone, even if she'd said no, I have shit for you to do
- idgaf
- I do, until the money runs out but not enough yo
- I would have left regardless
- you should have stepped on the gas
- also , as much as I would like to defend myself etc
- fuck you
- but thanks for letting me leave your house
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"Jesus\n"},{"text":"I\u0027m a shit girl friend\n"},{"text":"I go downstairs\n"},{"text":"knowing one of my laptops iko apo\n"},{"text":"obvs niko kaa chini hadi saa hii\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"knowing full well nilikuwa niongee na Phil\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"nikalenga, sikumuongelesha\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"9\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"watu wakamaliza kukula\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"nikaenda chini, kama Kawa mkate, chai, pineapple ilikuwa na brown spots mob\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"na orange\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"zero fuckin protein\n"},{"text":"not as a joke\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"not a single gram, no egg nothing\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"kurudi apa ma 1 am\n"},{"text":"Phil ame sms, text na call\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"alisahau funguo naks\n"},{"text":"sijacomfort msee, sijamuongelesha ata, kitu tu nikukula, kuwatch na kusahau watu\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"yaani I am there for nobody, nobody will be there for me\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"so ata sijui koma amelala wapi, amekaa wapi ameenda wapi atatumiwa\n"},{"text":"alivunja lock ama mlango, what\u0027s up\n"},{"embeddedObjects":[{"type":"horizontalRuleLine"}]},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"after going to see mum\n"},{"text":"she\u0027s like who are you seeing, which friends are these you don\u0027t know them\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I feel like she was trying to give me a hard time,\n"},{"text":"and I honestly don\u0027t know how to say \u0027nicely \u0027 to her\n"},{"text":"that I genuinely would have gone, even if she\u0027d said no, I have shit for you to do\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"idgaf\n"},{"text":"I do, until the money runs out but not enough yo\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I would have left regardless\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"you should have stepped on the gas\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"also , as much as I would like to defend myself etc\n"},{"text":"fuck you\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"but thanks for letting me leave your house\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":413},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2023-10-07T22:51:57Z
- modifiedDate 2023-11-12T21:25:51Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid A94747EC6B8047569BA8145DB8C65287
- starred false
- pinned false
- text '
- ,
- .
- im woken up
- fuckin anxious as hell
- after thatmajor anxious episode
- idk what else to callit
- I took a bad shit
- no pain but lumpy smooth and stinky
- my gut needs help
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"im woken up\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"fuckin anxious as hell\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"after thatmajor anxious episode\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"idk what else to callit\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I took a bad shit\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"no pain but lumpy smooth and stinky\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"my gut needs help"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":456},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2023-10-05T09:13:17Z
- modifiedDate 2024-04-05T05:47:45Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid ED48BC0EDE5D4835819E19ED82C4BC30
- starred false
- pinned false
- text '
- ,
- .
- I have this thing where I'll have violent abdominal spasms
- like stomach intestines writhing, pushing violently
- then I'll haul ass to the toilet and my ass will explode
- then it's back to normal
- as if nothing happened
- after that violent shit
- I stand up, i look back
- it was a horror
- brown sludge filled the entire bowl, all the way across
- I proceeded to pour 7 -8 buckets
- the first half one, it looked like literal sewage
- I'm ashamed it came out of my body
- it was a brown sludge, thick and full
- wah
- ***
- I've had a horrible afternoon
- my mum called to talk to me
- I went to her office and sat down
- she lectured me and then I cried
- I left her office and sent her a text
- I hate this woman
- my mental health is in the trash and afterwards I want to kill myself
- do you see the correlation
- her husband tried to call me twice and I picked up
- because he said it's very disrespectful not to pick up calls
- she had told me I need to be useful ( reminiscent of him calling me a parasite)
- and he was calling to check if I was okay asking several times if I was okay
- I'm not close to any of this motherfukers like that
- so I've had a horrible afternoon and my abdominal pain is back so I've taken an ibuprofen and I'm hoping I can take a nap till the end of time
- I fucking hate my life
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I have this thing where I\u0027ll have violent abdominal spasms\n"},{"text":"like stomach intestines writhing, pushing violently\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"then I\u0027ll haul ass to the toilet and my ass will explode\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"then it\u0027s back to normal\n"},{"text":"as if nothing happened\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"after that violent shit\n"},{"text":"I stand up, i look back\n"},{"text":"it was a horror\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"brown sludge filled the entire bowl, all the way across\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I proceeded to pour 7 -8 buckets\n"},{"text":"the first half one, it looked like literal sewage\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I\u0027m ashamed it came out of my body\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"it was a brown sludge, thick and full\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"wah\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"embeddedObjects":[{"type":"horizontalRuleLine"}]},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I\u0027ve had a horrible afternoon\n"},{"text":"my mum called to talk to me\n"},{"text":"I went to her office and sat down\n"},{"text":"she lectured me and then I cried\n"},{"text":"I left her office and sent her a text\n"},{"text":"I hate this woman\n"},{"text":"my mental health is in the trash and afterwards I want to kill myself\n"},{"text":"do you see the correlation\n"},{"text":"her husband tried to call me twice and I picked up\n"},{"text":"because he said it\u0027s very disrespectful not to pick up calls\n"},{"text":"she had told me I need to be useful ( reminiscent of him calling me a parasite)\n"},{"text":"and he was calling to check if I was okay asking several times if I was okay\n"},{"text":"I\u0027m not close to any of this motherfukers like that\n"},{"text":"so I\u0027ve had a horrible afternoon and my abdominal pain is back so I\u0027ve taken an ibuprofen and I\u0027m hoping I can take a nap till the end of time\n"},{"text":"I fucking hate my life\n"},{"text":"\n"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":456},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2023-10-04T07:04:48Z
- modifiedDate 2024-04-05T05:47:55Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid EAD582913B664C20843B2A74CA9B8C22
- starred false
- pinned false
- text '
- ,
- .
- i almost ranawoman just outside of naivas over
- she moved and I realised I ran her over
- it's actually only god that I was alone in the car so no one saw my shame
- I almost ran someone over at naivas
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"i almost ranawoman just outside of naivas over\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"she moved and I realised I ran her over\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"it\u0027s actually only god that I was alone in the car so no one saw my shame\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I almost ran someone over at naivas"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":413},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2023-10-03T08:24:43Z
- modifiedDate 2023-10-04T13:54:11Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid 5458D4AA0D0C4A3C920A13D93E5E219A
- starred false
- pinned false
- text '
- ,
- .
- my nipples are sore
- my period isn't here yet
- I'm 65 kilos
- am I cryptically gregnant
- take care yourself man
- I need to take care of myself too
- some men will always have you in sacrifice mode
- ***
- 17:35
- am I vegan
- or at least vegetarian
- like, am I going to stop eating meat
- fish
- chicken
- everything
- I hate the smell of fish already
- goat etc
- I think I'm having a hot flash
- or my basal metabolic rate rose too high after eating a large carbohydrate
- I was talking to Philip and he mentioned marriage again and I don't know whether it's because I think I deserve better or I don't want to get married but
- I realised that I am holding out for something else and I think it's the better one?
- which makes no sense because he's good, I have no one else in mind, I'm just thinking of other things
- idk how to explain
- I feel like my dad is tryna be nice
- but you're part of the problem
- also there's no where I would have liked going till 10 pm at night
- 9:45 but still
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"my nipples are sore\n"},{"text":"my period isn\u0027t here yet\n"},{"text":"I\u0027m 65 kilos\n"},{"text":"am I cryptically gregnant\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"take care yourself man\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I need to take care of myself too\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"some men will always have you in sacrifice mode\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"embeddedObjects":[{"type":"horizontalRuleLine"}]},{"text":"17:35\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"am I vegan\n"},{"text":"or at least vegetarian\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"like, am I going to stop eating meat\n"},{"text":"fish\n"},{"text":"chicken\n"},{"text":"everything\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I hate the smell of fish already\n"},{"text":"goat etc\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I think I\u0027m having a hot flash\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"or my basal metabolic rate rose too high after eating a large carbohydrate\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I was talking to Philip and he mentioned marriage again and I don\u0027t know whether it\u0027s because I think I deserve better or I don\u0027t want to get married but\n"},{"text":"I realised that I am holding out for something else and I think it\u0027s the better one?\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"which makes no sense because he\u0027s good, I have no one else in mind, I\u0027m just thinking of other things\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"idk how to explain\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I feel like my dad is tryna be nice\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"but you\u0027re part of the problem\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"also there\u0027s no where I would have liked going till 10 pm at night\n"},{"text":"9:45 but still"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":413},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2023-09-29T23:57:42Z
- modifiedDate 2023-10-28T06:32:33Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid 5AFAC9D4077148AE8819862967F39E75
- starred false
- pinned false
- text ',
- .
- ,
- I have gotten irrationally annoyed by people taking my stuff
- I don't take other people's stuff so I am well within my rights to get annoyed when someone wears my shoes
- I also don't know why I got so mad when the water bill people came to check the metre
- ***
- I think a little part of me broke down on Friday
- when we were in the car and Lillian was just a fucking cunt from morning
- lateness
- tense atmosphere
- taking over at the graduation
- finally sitting in the car and complaining about a fucking tassel
- and my head wrap
- I think a little part of me hardened up
- when we were sitting in that big ass car
- whoso loan is being paid off
- acting happy
- as if
- and having the person who gave birth to you me so mean
- saying you're a disappointment
- and I was trying to hold onto my sanity
- my sense of self
- like after all the mess this whole year
- aren't you finally happy
- aren't you finally content
- after hearing my name being called out , she literally turned around to lay into me
- and I realize I can't make you happy
- and that fucker, looking like a big dolt
- a big lug
- not saying shit
- not defending me even once
- he'd let her tear into me regardless
- I have often had a fantasy that if he was in the room when these discussions happened,
- he would be on my side
- so I have reluctantly been agreeing to the label daddy's girl
- but I now realise that that is not the case
- he'd hang me out to dry as well
- the absolute fuckery
- and Annie looking beautiful and having a supportive mum
- really got to me
- like really
- how are others happy , celebrating with their parents
- mine suck
- ***
- I stopped trusting and trying to confide in and be close to her
- lifted verbatim from Reddit
- and it ain't a lie
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"\u0027,\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":"I have gotten irrationally annoyed by people taking my stuff\n"},{"text":"I don\u0027t take other people\u0027s stuff so I am well within my rights to get annoyed when someone wears my shoes\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I also don\u0027t know why I got so mad when the water bill people came to check the metre\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"embeddedObjects":[{"type":"horizontalRuleLine"}]},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I think a little part of me broke down on Friday\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"when we were in the car and Lillian was just a fucking cunt from morning\n"},{"text":"lateness\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"tense atmosphere\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"taking over at the graduation\n"},{"text":"finally sitting in the car and complaining about a fucking tassel\n"},{"text":"and my head wrap\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I think a little part of me hardened up\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"when we were sitting in that big ass car\n"},{"text":"whoso loan is being paid off\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"acting happy\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"as if\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"and having the person who gave birth to you me so mean\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"saying you\u0027re a disappointment\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"and I was trying to hold onto my sanity\n"},{"text":"my sense of self\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"like after all the mess this whole year\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"aren\u0027t you finally happy\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"aren\u0027t you finally content\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"after hearing my name being called out , she literally turned around to lay into me\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"and I realize I can\u0027t make you happy\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"and that fucker, looking like a big dolt\n"},{"text":"a big lug\n"},{"text":"not saying shit\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"not defending me even once\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"he\u0027d let her tear into me regardless\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I have often had a fantasy that if he was in the room when these discussions happened,\n"},{"text":"he would be on my side\n"},{"text":"so I have reluctantly been agreeing to the label daddy\u0027s girl\n"},{"text":"but I now realise that that is not the case\n"},{"text":"he\u0027d hang me out to dry as well\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"the absolute fuckery\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"and Annie looking beautiful and having a supportive mum\n"},{"text":"really got to me\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"like really\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"how are others happy , celebrating with their parents\n"},{"text":"mine suck\n\n\n"},{"embeddedObjects":[{"type":"horizontalRuleLine"}]},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I stopped trusting and trying to confide in and be close to her\n"},{"text":"lifted verbatim from Reddit\n"},{"text":"and it ain\u0027t a lie \n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":413},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2023-09-26T11:05:00Z
- modifiedDate 2023-09-26T19:44:25Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid 301FD62667AA4D5487A0BFB3A2F7B6E0
- starred false
- pinned false
- text '
- ,
- .
- kicked out of cake picking
- hope I enjoy this day
- it's 12.25
- and I am getting more anxious by the second
- also might be dehydrated
- ppl are here
- I am a bit anxious, don't know why
- shower, nothing
- I'm keyed up
- and I hope no more people show up to support
- ***
- horror of horrors
- confirmation received, my dad is a fucker too
- jeez
- all gratitude out the window bruv
- the one time I ask
- pooey
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"kicked out of cake picking\n"},{"text":"hope I enjoy this day\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"it\u0027s 12.25\n"},{"text":"and I am getting more anxious by the second\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"also might be dehydrated\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"ppl are here\n"},{"text":"I am a bit anxious, don\u0027t know why\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"shower, nothing\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I\u0027m keyed up\n"},{"text":"and I hope no more people show up to support\n"},{"embeddedObjects":[{"type":"horizontalRuleLine"}]},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"horror of horrors\n"},{"text":"confirmation received, my dad is a fucker too\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"jeez\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"all gratitude out the window bruv\n\n"},{"text":"the one time I ask\n"},{"text":"pooey\n\n\n\n"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":413},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2023-09-24T07:01:52Z
- modifiedDate 2023-09-24T13:04:16Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid CB175042C4824B4495E6C10BA05904C6
- starred false
- pinned false
- text '
- ,
- .
- i know that that is a line of thought that thinks that i should cut lillian some slack but i have been cutting Lillian a lot of slark over the years i get tired too
- i also know that having seen Annie and her mum interact just for like a few minutes all the way from utafiti primary school to aiesec to her graduation
- i know there mums out there who can be unnegative; mine doesn't seem to know that
- i'm i supposed to be kind to her all the time when she's not thinking of being kind to me by calling me disappointing and fixating on the dumbest most inconsequential things
- like a fucking tassel, my hair, a cape, etc
- **clearly that disappointing comment got to me because, have your actions not been disappointing the entire day**
- i will be difficult to the end of my life
- you can't do this forever
- ***
- I'm still heated from jana
- but I've had a nice brekky, food plus soft white bread
- nyanya is still around
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"i know that that is a line of thought that thinks that i should cut lillian some slack but i have been cutting Lillian a lot of slark over the years i get tired too\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"i also know that having seen Annie and her mum interact just for like a few minutes all the way from utafiti primary school to aiesec to her graduation\n"},{"text":"i know there mums out there who can be unnegative; mine doesn\u0027t seem to know that\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"i\u0027m i supposed to be kind to her all the time when she\u0027s not thinking of being kind to me by calling me disappointing and fixating on the dumbest most inconsequential things\n"},{"text":"like a fucking tassel, my hair, a cape, etc\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"attributes":{"bold":true},"text":"clearly that disappointing comment got to me because, have your actions not been disappointing the entire day\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"i will be difficult to the end of my life\n"},{"text":"you can\u0027t do this forever\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"embeddedObjects":[{"type":"horizontalRuleLine"}]},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I\u0027m still heated from jana\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"but I\u0027ve had a nice brekky, food plus soft white bread\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"nyanya is still around\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":413},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2023-09-23T07:35:51Z
- modifiedDate 2023-09-23T07:43:50Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid 16F9FBDDF23A406B8986021012D395D1
- starred false
- pinned false
- text '
- ,
- .
- I'm a taker
- 13.29
- barely half the day gone
- and Lillian is a fucking cunt
- disappointed over a tassel and my hair
- she can never be trusted
- ever
- by the way mi niliboeka
- ivyo Tu
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"I\u0027m a taker\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"13.29\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"barely half the day gone\n"},{"text":"and Lillian is a fucking cunt\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"disappointed over a tassel and my hair\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"she can never be trusted\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"ever\n\n\n\n\n"},{"text":"by the way mi niliboeka\n\n"},{"text":"ivyo Tu\n"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":413},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2023-09-22T04:09:20Z
- modifiedDate 2023-09-23T07:44:18Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid 099645A442714DF084044D7D80F699FA
- starred false
- pinned false
- text '
- ,
- .
- i have found a piece of .lastic in the cake
- fuck happycakes
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"i have found a piece of .lastic in the cake\n\n"},{"text":"fuck happycakes"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":413},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2023-09-21T15:23:41Z
- modifiedDate 2023-09-21T15:24:48Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid 16B7B3327C8E483A8C906736602FD1E7
- starred false
- pinned false
- text '
- ,
- .
- nimekula hadi naburst
- got my pits waxed
- feel bald
- ate Phil's cake
- since I mentioned that I shall list every good thing Phil does or how good he is to me
- I enjoy identifying the good things in him
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"nimekula hadi naburst\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"got my pits waxed\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"feel bald\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"ate Phil\u0027s cake\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"since I mentioned that I shall list every good thing Phil does or how good he is to me\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I enjoy identifying the good things in him\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":413},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2023-09-20T17:28:24Z
- modifiedDate 2023-10-28T06:32:28Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid 2D95662FE0C14735A03566199EE45E53
- starred false
- pinned false
- text '
- ,
- .
- got my dress for graduation
- from Vivo
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"got my dress for graduation\n"},{"text":"from Vivo\n"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":413},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2023-09-18T20:21:12Z
- modifiedDate 2023-09-18T20:21:48Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid EA130E57D32B4292A8E22734449AD052
- starred false
- pinned false
- text '
- ,
- .
- i smell kind of sour
- like I really stink
- i cannot wait to emancipate myself from Lillian
- no longer will she have to cry coz of me
- they want to ensure I have good home training,
- and I feel like I'm trying to survive
- ;;
- stop the pen, the blood is too much
- liquidy, thin nonstop
- and I ate a ton of food
- r,b,veg, bread
- aren't you afraid of microplastics and nanoplastics in your pussy
- also, ayesha is on top
- email at 8.30, responded at midnight, 2 minutes later, she responds back
- truly a boss
- ***
- also forgot to mention my mum has her own daddy issues
- and mummy issues
- so we're sharing a hai
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"i smell kind of sour\n"},{"text":"like I really stink\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"i cannot wait to emancipate myself from Lillian\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"no longer will she have to cry coz of me\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"they want to ensure I have good home training,\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"and I feel like I\u0027m trying to survive\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":";;\n"},{"text":"stop the pen, the blood is too much\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"liquidy, thin nonstop\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"and I ate a ton of food\n"},{"text":"r,b,veg, bread\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"aren\u0027t you afraid of microplastics and nanoplastics in your pussy\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"also, ayesha is on top\n"},{"text":"email at 8.30, responded at midnight, 2 minutes later, she responds back\n"},{"text":"truly a boss\n"},{"embeddedObjects":[{"type":"horizontalRuleLine"}]},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"also forgot to mention my mum has her own daddy issues\n"},{"text":"and mummy issues\n\n"},{"text":"so we\u0027re sharing a hai\n\n"},{"text":"\n"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":413},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2023-09-15T21:55:14Z
- modifiedDate 2023-09-16T11:58:13Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid 5FE9A6CA6BFD4B8E949407EBAF028015
- starred false
- pinned false
- text '
- ,
- .
- took a shower feel brand new
- a new person
- no longer furious
- please lord
- let us not
- laze in bed the whole day
- ill get sores
- 21:33
- I'm pissed by this fucker
- so when anybody calls my name, I stand at attention
- I'm actually pissed
- also I'm looking for confirmation that I wont regret not attending it
- it's the grad photos that are psyching me out
- 23:35
- that was really heavy for me
- and I feel sad
- and like crying
- disrespectful fo chilling in my room
- alice is of a lower intelligence level
- me and my dad, Sheesh
- if my dad was not my dad, me and him would not get along
- if he was my uncle, I wouldn't even like this man
- I do not receive that
- I don't agree with you and I will not waste my energy on someone who is wrong
- I wil not open up
- certainly not to you
- bravo to me though
- Bravo!
- I have really worked on clamming up and I am doing a spectacular job
- change clothes
- dont hide your hair
- attitude
- respect, I'm not being respectful in some way
- idk how
- do more chores\*\*\*\*
- as always
- I love spending time with Alice.
- you can't have both, either you harp on about how i need to do chores or not
- my hair, fuck you.
- it's disrespectful to have a hat on.
- wearing pants obstinately
- say thank you to Rabala
- some people made you pass
- I wholeheartedly agree. when I got the news I'd passed, I was in disbelief
- full on disbelief
- I thank God for Abade for passing me, for instigating his peers to pass me
- for all those people holding out hope against hope
- and literally pushing me over the edge to succeed
- I know it wasn't me.
- I'm sorry ( to my parents) for looking like I think it's all me
- I assure you from September 2020 onwards
- I passed by spit, and angel dust
- nothing on me 😂😂😂
- I shall say thank you
- I fully regret not saying thank you to prof Waiganjo
- so I shall
- clothes, attitude , church
- I'm sorry, I'm not going to church at 7 am
- if I go, I'm going by force , I'm not cleaning up
- also, fuck the graduation
- ill get some more info
- then I'll tell you if il go
- latest Sato
- ill talk to MJ
- nigga wecant be friends
- you're my parents
- I can't wait for the day I leave and finally block you. all of you. even the good ones
- and I don't want any referees tbh
- uncle job is a gangsta and maybe neurotypical
- I want to be babied
- and I know I can't tell you , I'm scared I'll be a nabody. I have no skills.
- ppl who do better than me intimidate me
- I hate newlife, I have no intention of going back to school
- I'm tired and I want to rest.
- I hate talking to you , you make me cry
- I don't want to do a lot of things. I think I'm not capable
- I want to rest
- we'll probably fight and maybe that pressure will keep me on my toes
- and I have no inclination to me obedient
- rage till I die bitches
- id rather miss that graduation out of spite
- my mom really wants me to get a job, more than me it seems.
- by December were going to be in it for sure
- step on the gas Lillian, soon well me out of each others hair
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"took a shower feel brand new\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"a new person\n"},{"text":"no longer furious\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"please lord\n"},{"text":"let us not\n"},{"text":"laze in bed the whole day\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"ill get sores\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"21:33\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I\u0027m pissed by this fucker\n"},{"text":"so when anybody calls my name, I stand at attention\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I\u0027m actually pissed\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"also I\u0027m looking for confirmation that I wont regret not attending it\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"it\u0027s the grad photos that are psyching me out\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"23:35\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"that was really heavy for me\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"and I feel sad\n"},{"text":"and like crying\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"disrespectful fo chilling in my room\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"alice is of a lower intelligence level\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"me and my dad, Sheesh\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"if my dad was not my dad, me and him would not get along\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"if he was my uncle, I wouldn\u0027t even like this man\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I do not receive that\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I don\u0027t agree with you and I will not waste my energy on someone who is wrong\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I wil not open up\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"certainly not to you\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"bravo to me though\n"},{"text":"Bravo!\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I have really worked on clamming up and I am doing a spectacular job\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"change clothes\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"dont hide your hair\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"attitude\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"respect, I\u0027m not being respectful in some way\n"},{"text":"idk how\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"do more chores****\n"},{"text":"as always\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I love spending time with Alice.\n"},{"text":"you can\u0027t have both, either you harp on about how i need to do chores or not\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"my hair, fuck you.\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"it\u0027s disrespectful to have a hat on.\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"wearing pants obstinately\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"say thank you to Rabala\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"some people made you pass\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I wholeheartedly agree. when I got the news I\u0027d passed, I was in disbelief\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"full on disbelief\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I thank God for Abade for passing me, for instigating his peers to pass me\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"for all those people holding out hope against hope\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"and literally pushing me over the edge to succeed\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I know it wasn\u0027t me.\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I\u0027m sorry ( to my parents) for looking like I think it\u0027s all me\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I assure you from September 2020 onwards\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I passed by spit, and angel dust\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"nothing on me 😂😂😂\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I shall say thank you\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I fully regret not saying thank you to prof Waiganjo\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"so I shall\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"clothes, attitude , church\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I\u0027m sorry, I\u0027m not going to church at 7 am\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"if I go, I\u0027m going by force , I\u0027m not cleaning up\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"also, fuck the graduation\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"ill get some more info\n"},{"text":"then I\u0027ll tell you if il go\n"},{"text":"latest Sato\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"ill talk to MJ\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"nigga wecant be friends\n"},{"text":"you\u0027re my parents\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I can\u0027t wait for the day I leave and finally block you. all of you. even the good ones\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"and I don\u0027t want any referees tbh\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"uncle job is a gangsta and maybe neurotypical\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I want to be babied\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"and I know I can\u0027t tell you , I\u0027m scared I\u0027ll be a nabody. I have no skills.\n"},{"text":"ppl who do better than me intimidate me\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I hate newlife, I have no intention of going back to school\n"},{"text":"I\u0027m tired and I want to rest.\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I hate talking to you , you make me cry\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I don\u0027t want to do a lot of things. I think I\u0027m not capable\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I want to rest\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"we\u0027ll probably fight and maybe that pressure will keep me on my toes\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"and I have no inclination to me obedient\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"rage till I die bitches\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"id rather miss that graduation out of spite\n\n\n\n\n\n"},{"text":"my mom really wants me to get a job, more than me it seems.\n\n"},{"text":"by December were going to be in it for sure\n\n\n"},{"text":"step on the gas Lillian, soon well me out of each others hair"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":413},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2023-09-15T01:13:05Z
- modifiedDate 2023-09-15T21:20:32Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid 0861922D10DC4EA6840E75205AB6D9BE
- starred false
- pinned false
- text '
- ,
- .
- will I regret it
- I don't wanna go
- I have family
- last time , I was talking about puke, but I cleaned it
- and I was talking about clean
- and I missed it😂😂
- 19:37
- i was furious
- but that is an act of love
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"will I regret it\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I don\u0027t wanna go\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I have family\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"last time , I was talking about puke, but I cleaned it\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"and I was talking about clean\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"and I missed it😂😂\n\n\n\n"},{"text":"19:37\n\n\n"},{"text":"i was furious\n"},{"text":"but that is an act of love\n\n"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":413},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2023-09-14T11:01:08Z
- modifiedDate 2023-09-14T16:38:30Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid F38294DA653C479CA469C5917CB23A10
- starred false
- pinned false
- text '
- ,
- .
- I'm a cunt
- I saw the cats rolf
- I was sleepy and tired and CLEAN
- nikaiacha
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"I\u0027m a cunt\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I saw the cats rolf\n"},{"text":"I was sleepy and tired and CLEAN\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"nikaiacha"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":413},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2023-09-11T07:28:18Z
- modifiedDate 2023-09-14T11:01:47Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid 0B477CE763414DF4957FC429C2A3F9F2
- starred false
- pinned false
- text being clean is my happy place
- being clean is my happy place
- being clean is my happy place
- I'm showered
- I washed my room.
- I changed my sheets
- I removed my mattress cover
- I washed it
- I hung all my clothes
- I washed my blanket
- my clothes are with me
- I cleaned my balcony
- I cleaned the study,
- braisons balcony
- did I leave the mop in a bucket of water
- my coochie is clean
- my booty is clean
- my clothes are put away
- I have dandruff but who cares
- I'm fantasmagorgeous
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"being clean is my happy place\n"},{"text":"being clean is my happy place\n"},{"text":"being clean is my happy place\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I\u0027m showered\n"},{"text":"I washed my room.\n"},{"text":"I changed my sheets\n"},{"text":"I removed my mattress cover\n"},{"text":"I washed it\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I hung all my clothes\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I washed my blanket\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"my clothes are with me\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I cleaned my balcony\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I cleaned the study,\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"braisons balcony\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"did I leave the mop in a bucket of water\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"my coochie is clean\n"},{"text":"my booty is clean\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"my clothes are put away\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I have dandruff but who cares\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I\u0027m fantasmagorgeous\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":413},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2023-09-10T21:16:58Z
- modifiedDate 2023-09-14T11:01:48Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid 156E6B4D9C5F42869AF59434AADDF08E
- starred false
- pinned false
- text '
- ,
- .
- I can't believe I'm graduating.
- I honestly didn't believe it
- but look at this
- ![](dayone-moment://9C828C7C00484EFAAAE05E265FE7308C)
- https://www.paired.com/articles/communication-in-relationships
- it's fuckin real
- I can believe in myself now
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I can\u0027t believe I\u0027m graduating.\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I honestly didn\u0027t believe it\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"but look at this\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"embeddedObjects":[{"identifier":"9C828C7C00484EFAAAE05E265FE7308C","type":"photo"}]},{"text":"https://www.paired.com/articles/communication-in-relationships\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"it\u0027s fuckin real\n"},{"text":"I can believe in myself now"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":413},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2023-09-09T09:06:30Z
- modifiedDate 2023-10-10T06:54:37Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- photos
- identifier 9C828C7C00484EFAAAE05E265FE7308C
- md5 43c377ca93abfffc760175c94eba97b6
- type jpg
- fileSize 0
- orderInEntry 0
- height 0
- width 0
- favorite false
- duration 0
- exposureBiasValue 0
- md5Thumbnail 43c377ca93abfffc760175c94eba97b6
- v
- uuid 4762A39ED25A4E5EB9D5B150CE982214
- starred false
- pinned false
- text '
- ,
- .
- i changed my password with this man
- after a bit of soul searching
- just a bit, not too much, I come to the conclusion
- I don't want to leave him
- 'we should break up'
- I don't wanna be alone
- but I don't trust him, I can't have any thoughts to myself
- I may have been toying with the idea that I could say my thought out loud, or share them
- a là tswift
- 😂😂😂🫥
- fuck no
- it will be non stop policing, to make sure none of my shit is considered offensive
- god forbid I think of others, and juxtapose them with my thoughts
- I think we all learned a lesson, I'm scared of being alone
- and I can't trust ni💟💟as
- I can't, not for my peace of mind.
- I have to ask myself. am I lying to myself
- I don't know
- nobut I feel fuckin disrespected
- 5:04
- saa ni ndo nalala imagine
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"i changed my password with this man\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"after a bit of soul searching\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"just a bit, not too much, I come to the conclusion\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I don\u0027t want to leave him\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\u0027we should break up\u0027\n"},{"text":"I don\u0027t wanna be alone\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"but I don\u0027t trust him, I can\u0027t have any thoughts to myself\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I may have been toying with the idea that I could say my thought out loud, or share them\n"},{"text":"a là tswift\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"😂😂😂🫥\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"fuck no\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"it will be non stop policing, to make sure none of my shit is considered offensive\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"god forbid I think of others, and juxtapose them with my thoughts\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I think we all learned a lesson, I\u0027m scared of being alone\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"and I can\u0027t trust ni💟💟as\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I can\u0027t, not for my peace of mind.\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I have to ask myself. am I lying to myself\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I don\u0027t know\n"},{"text":"no"},{"text":"but I feel fuckin disrespected\n\n\n"},{"text":"5:04\n\n"},{"text":"saa ni ndo nalala imagine"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":409},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2023-09-09T00:20:15Z
- modifiedDate 2023-09-09T02:04:41Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid 272925EF667A4524B7BFE6261EE5B20B
- starred false
- pinned false
- text '
- ,
- .
- should I list all my griveances
- from most recent , then rank them by most egregious
- a white man just kicked me , by mistake as he climbed onto a motorcycle
- I'm late to bs
- I can't find a bus to town, in town, I'll have to walk kilometres to bs. at bs, there is a line
- I hate being an adult
- I have no ride home
- I wasted the entire day
- fr fr
- the halls cleared themselves up
- finance is still not done, and I won't be cleared coz I owe them a non compulsory 6000
- I have the money, I won't pay
- it was so hot
- ms Lillian,that cunt
- woke me up at 7 to wash dishes
- once the dishwashinc commenced, she said it was too much , that she'd wash them herself
- after calling me to help Alice
- so I went to shower , washed my head
- so fuckin uneasy
- then at 11 she dropped me off
- 17:22
- why am I blaming my parents, they haven't done anything.
- I hate being an adult, I really do
- anytime I have a stressful day, I wanna cry
- I bet anyone else would be seeing a way out
- I feel like a fool
- and noone can help
- it's all on me
- I shall hide 6k in my boob
- in moments like this, I hate my life
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"should I list all my griveances\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"from most recent , then rank them by most egregious\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"a white man just kicked me , by mistake as he climbed onto a motorcycle\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I\u0027m late to bs\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I can\u0027t find a bus to town, in town, I\u0027ll have to walk kilometres to bs. at bs, there is a line\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I hate being an adult\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I have no ride home\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I wasted the entire day\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"fr fr\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"the halls cleared themselves up\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"finance is still not done, and I won\u0027t be cleared coz I owe them a non compulsory 6000\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I have the money, I won\u0027t pay\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"it was so hot\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"ms Lillian,that cunt\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"woke me up at 7 to wash dishes\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"once the dishwashinc commenced, she said it was too much , that she\u0027d wash them herself\n"},{"text":"after calling me to help Alice\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"so I went to shower , washed my head\n"},{"text":"so fuckin uneasy\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"then at 11 she dropped me off\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"17:22\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"why am I blaming my parents, they haven\u0027t done anything.\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I hate being an adult, I really do\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"anytime I have a stressful day, I wanna cry\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I bet anyone else would be seeing a way out\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I feel like a fool\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"and noone can help\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"it\u0027s all on me\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I shall hide 6k in my boob\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"in moments like this, I hate my life"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":409},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2023-09-06T14:03:35Z
- modifiedDate 2023-09-06T14:34:58Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid 21DED21732A843D1A62E17F0E4A52C76
- starred false
- pinned false
- text '
- ,
- .
- end of aug
- it has been 6 months and 19 days
- that I've had my locs
- I think they're good
- we have a weakling at the back
- but they're loose and soft and comfy
- and they move a bit
- tons of dandruff but hey
- cant have everything
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"end of aug\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"it has been 6 months and 19 days\n"},{"text":"that I\u0027ve had my locs\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I think they\u0027re good\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"we have a weakling at the back\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"but they\u0027re loose and soft and comfy\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"and they move a bit\n"},{"text":"tons of dandruff but hey\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"cant have everything"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":409},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2023-08-31T11:19:20Z
- modifiedDate 2023-09-06T14:28:53Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid CE835044B7134E9A808EB9D1D57C4236
- starred false
- pinned false
- text '
- ,
- .
- and I always think I'll come here and be done so quickly
- never
- never
- never
- never
- never
- I get so vengeful
- 3RYN8tI
- every single time I come here
- I hate myself
- I hate my life
- I hate I have no money
- I wanna cut off old mutuals head
- I'm so pissed and I always wanna do shit after
- I feel like a non person
- it's momentary though
- I'm jealous
- MONEY MONEY MONEY
- in a rich man's world
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"and I always think I\u0027ll come here and be done so quickly\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"never\n"},{"text":"never\n"},{"text":"never\n"},{"text":"never\n"},{"text":"never\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I get so vengeful\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"3RYN8tI\n"},{"text":"every single time I come here\n"},{"text":"I hate myself\n"},{"text":"I hate my life\n"},{"text":"I hate I have no money\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I wanna cut off old mutuals head\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I\u0027m so pissed and I always wanna do shit after\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I feel like a non person\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"it\u0027s momentary though\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I\u0027m jealous\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"MONEY MONEY MONEY\n"},{"text":"in a rich man\u0027s world"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":409},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2023-08-29T20:23:47Z
- modifiedDate 2023-09-06T14:29:01Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid 72CAACC33DC64EB0B9CB0F7FD4BAAC3D
- starred false
- pinned false
- text '
- ,
- .
- what do people eat
- I'm in need of a snack, all the time
- idk , what do people do. or eat
- annoying ass, 🥷🏿 23.47
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"what do people eat\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I\u0027m in need of a snack, all the time\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"idk , what do people do. or eat\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"annoying ass, 🥷🏿 23.47"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":409},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2023-08-24T14:38:27Z
- modifiedDate 2023-09-06T14:29:07Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid 0316A0AE478C470EAA56A89B1C339CA8
- starred false
- pinned false
- text '
- ,
- .
- first threat unveiled, we wont take care of you forever
- I know my position
- and she had my dad deal with me
- he did, pronto
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"first threat unveiled, we wont take care of you forever\n\n"},{"text":"I know my position\n\n"},{"text":"and she had my dad deal with me\n\n"},{"text":"he did, pronto \n"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":406},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2023-08-23T04:14:14Z
- modifiedDate 2023-08-23T04:21:19Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid DFC4DA0F59A2456FA554D620851A7BC8
- starred false
- pinned false
- text '
- ,
- .
- so sleepy
- at church, I'm a bad Christian
- no wonder I don't like it here, apart from the inflammatory/ incendiary message,
- it's also a chance for me to reflect on my thoughts and actions and id like it
- because my character is not good, I'm invested in keeping the mask on, I want people to think well of me, but I cant back it up ( with appropriate actions )
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"so sleepy\n"},{"text":"at church, I\u0027m a bad Christian\n\n"},{"text":"no wonder I don\u0027t like it here, apart from the inflammatory/ incendiary message, \n"},{"text":"it\u0027s also a chance for me to reflect on my thoughts and actions and id like it\n\n"},{"text":"because my character is not good, I\u0027m invested in keeping the mask on, I want people to think well of me, but I cant back it up ( with appropriate actions )"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":406},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2023-08-21T06:27:00Z
- modifiedDate 2023-08-21T06:29:58Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid 1979488976004F328F9DA2BD3919963D
- starred false
- pinned false
- text ',.
- ',.
- ',.
- I have not spoken to Phil because he was not online when I was online
- but I have realised that I want someone who will give up their family and replace them with me because I would give up my family and replace them with him but that is not the case
- gross but true
- I know he's talked to his si and I don't have to grab his attention nonstop
- I know I'm needy( esp since I don't have school no redirect my energy)
- but damn, don't you wanna talk to me
- I have to cook lunch, supper, clean up
- you get to sit and chill and say I couldn't get to you so ┐( ˘_˘)┌
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"\u0027,.\n"},{"text":"\u0027,.\n"},{"text":"\u0027,.\n"},{"text":"I have not spoken to Phil because he was not online when I was online\n"},{"text":"but I have realised that I want someone who will give up their family and replace them with me because I would give up my family and replace them with him but that is not the case\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"gross but true\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I know he\u0027s talked to his si and I don\u0027t have to grab his attention nonstop\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I know I\u0027m needy( esp since I don\u0027t have school no redirect my energy)\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"but damn, don\u0027t you wanna talk to me\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I have to cook lunch, supper, clean up\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"you get to sit and chill and say I couldn\u0027t get to you so ┐( ˘_˘)┌"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":435},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2023-08-19T23:56:59Z
- modifiedDate 2023-12-30T13:17:26Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid 2508163DD38A4D0B87AD02F5BA01D547
- starred false
- pinned false
- text '
- ,
- .
- I'm in a bad mood
- I said since I ain't got no more stress,
- I could kill my emotional eating habit
- but I'm so stressed by not knowing what to do
- what to focus my energy on
- I have the report
- the ISC class
- forage
- all this shit I said I was gonna do
- not to mention 313 and 316
- I should start studying and making flashcards for those
- ***
- ultimately, I'm scared. I feel like I have no direction
- like I'm going to crash and burn.
- I don't want to.
- there is no overarching direction ruling me anymore and I don't know what to do.
- ***
- Phil is # that he hasn't seen me this year, to saw me 3 more times, last year
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"I\u0027m in a bad mood\n"},{"text":"I said since I ain\u0027t got no more stress,\n"},{"text":"I could kill my emotional eating habit\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"but I\u0027m so stressed by not knowing what to do\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"what to focus my energy on\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I have the report\n"},{"text":"the ISC class\n"},{"text":"forage\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"all this shit I said I was gonna do\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"not to mention 313 and 316\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I should start studying and making flashcards for those\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"embeddedObjects":[{"type":"horizontalRuleLine"}]},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"ultimately, I\u0027m scared. I feel like I have no direction\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"like I\u0027m going to crash and burn.\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I don\u0027t want to.\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"there is no overarching direction ruling me anymore and I don\u0027t know what to do.\n"},{"embeddedObjects":[{"type":"horizontalRuleLine"}]},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"Phil is # that he hasn\u0027t seen me this year, to saw me 3 more times, last year\n"},{"text":"\n"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":413},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2023-08-17T15:05:35Z
- modifiedDate 2023-10-28T06:32:08Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid 1409B537BB2148508C332E40E3A60D8A
- starred false
- pinned false
- text ,
- .
- '
- knock knock
- Nigella, amka Updike / usaidie kupika . Sisi tutoke
- good morning!
- end of story
- richText {"contents":[{"text":",\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":"knock knock\n"},{"text":"Nigella, amka Updike / usaidie kupika . Sisi tutoke\n\n"},{"text":"good morning!\n\n"},{"text":"end of story\n\n"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":406},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2023-08-12T04:37:35Z
- modifiedDate 2023-08-12T04:39:13Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid 9F3D9064C7CE48689570654E352CA258
- starred false
- pinned false
- text '
- ,
- .
- @10.08
- I've seen a beautiful black dog
- with brown on his (I've seen a swinging ball sack)haunches
- he's very sniffy, I love him already and I have visions of having him and taking care of him
- I feel responsible for not telling Braison to go to the admin to get his shit straight
- ima have to go too
- and I've washed my clothes, ready to be hung
- mums having hers washed too
- I haven't gone far but I'm bushed.
- I haven't eaten and I hAVE seen a marathon poster by Agnes
- what we and my brother are carrying out is deception
- by omission
- 22.07
- lying to my loved ones about my graduation, when I know well and good it not this yr
- and Lillian is a cunt
- always will be a cunt
- even in her room, taking down her duty hair
- I had to remind myself that she's a cunt
- she's a cunt who was thanking me profusely but a cunt all the same
- I knew it than, that it wouldn't last
- that it was only in the now and nothing else counts
- it wont matter in a few hours
- 😂😂😂😼 it doesnt
- if it isn't convenient for her then we can't do it
- fr
- if Lillian's not an board then
- fuck u
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"@10.08\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I\u0027ve seen a beautiful black dog\n"},{"text":"with brown on his (I\u0027ve seen a swinging ball sack)haunches\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"he\u0027s very sniffy, I love him already and I have visions of having him and taking care of him\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I feel responsible for not telling Braison to go to the admin to get his shit straight\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"ima have to go too\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"and I\u0027ve washed my clothes, ready to be hung\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"mums having hers washed too\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I haven\u0027t gone far but I\u0027m bushed.\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I haven\u0027t eaten and I hAVE seen a marathon poster by Agnes\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"what we and my brother are carrying out is deception\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"by omission\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"22.07\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"lying to my loved ones about my graduation, when I know well and good it not this yr\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"and Lillian is a cunt\n"},{"text":"always will be a cunt\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"even in her room, taking down her duty hair\n"},{"text":"I had to remind myself that she\u0027s a cunt\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"she\u0027s a cunt who was thanking me profusely but a cunt all the same\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I knew it than, that it wouldn\u0027t last\n"},{"text":"that it was only in the now and nothing else counts\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"it wont matter in a few hours\n"},{"text":"😂😂😂😼 it doesnt\n\n\n\n\n"},{"text":"if it isn\u0027t convenient for her then we can\u0027t do it\n\n"},{"text":"fr\n"},{"text":"if Lillian\u0027s not an board then\n"},{"text":"fuck u"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":406},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2023-08-11T07:08:27Z
- modifiedDate 2023-08-11T19:11:21Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid 207907AA38D64127A43FE208119CED39
- starred false
- pinned false
- text '
- ,
- .
- I woke up so fucking late for all I told Phil about sleeping
- and the fundis were here, breaking shit
- being fucking noisy
- and I gave back mums laptop
- and I got a might righteous abdominal cramp to poop
- my loo still stinks
- and I cant remember what I was excited to do this morning
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"I woke up so fucking late for all I told Phil about sleeping\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"and the fundis were here, breaking shit\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"being fucking noisy\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"and I gave back mums laptop\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"and I got a might righteous abdominal cramp to poop\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"my loo still stinks\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"and I cant remember what I was excited to do this morning"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":413},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2023-08-10T07:21:38Z
- modifiedDate 2023-10-28T06:32:05Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid 6ECA2B9B804540B4BCE8639696B1B1C5
- starred false
- pinned false
- text '
- ,
- .
- I feel guilty
- for not getting up
- and going to school , to check on my exam
- and also
- I think my dad bribed me with money to be good
- am I his favourite
- ***
- windows is. a cunt , they locked me out after I got a good thing going
- and I wish I'd finished earlier
- I made a very small meat stew with potatoes
- ate it with some stinky rice
- and veg- cabb and mboga
- had a heavy lunch of gith and cabbage
- 7 slices for brekkie, 3 in the evening
- numerous peanuts, calories in the hundreds per
- Phil's back in nai
- it's Thurs
- I'm clean, I'm oiled
- my face is clean
- my pussy and my ass are clean
- my hair is clean, it's cold it's not itchy
- it's one of the best feelings is the world and I wish it could last forever
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"I feel guilty\n"},{"text":"for not getting up\n"},{"text":"and going to school , to check on my exam\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"and also\n"},{"text":"I think my dad bribed me with money to be good\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"am I his favourite\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"embeddedObjects":[{"type":"horizontalRuleLine"}]},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"windows is. a cunt , they locked me out after I got a good thing going\n"},{"text":"and I wish I\u0027d finished earlier\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I made a very small meat stew with potatoes\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"ate it with some stinky rice\n"},{"text":"and veg- cabb and mboga\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"had a heavy lunch of gith and cabbage\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"7 slices for brekkie, 3 in the evening\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"numerous peanuts, calories in the hundreds per\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"Phil\u0027s back in nai\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"it\u0027s Thurs\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I\u0027m clean, I\u0027m oiled\n"},{"text":"my face is clean\n"},{"text":"my pussy and my ass are clean\n"},{"text":"my hair is clean, it\u0027s cold it\u0027s not itchy\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"it\u0027s one of the best feelings is the world and I wish it could last forever\n"},{"text":"\n"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":413},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2023-08-09T06:15:56Z
- modifiedDate 2023-11-12T21:25:41Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid 5F0F287B777543939107CB14B1459BB9
- starred false
- pinned false
- text '
- ,
- .
- so
- I'm fucking up, I don't know why
- 10.13 pm
- i te the last piece of avocado, it was lovely
- cold firm green flesh with some undersalted veg
- I gotta cut down on my salt
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"so\n"},{"text":"I\u0027m fucking up, I don\u0027t know why\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"10.13 pm\n\n"},{"text":"i te the last piece of avocado, it was lovely\n"},{"text":"cold firm green flesh with some undersalted veg\n\n\n"},{"text":"I gotta cut down on my salt"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":406},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2023-08-07T12:26:44Z
- modifiedDate 2023-08-07T19:14:31Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid 93BBA741DCBE4F11B6CD0D31D5B49FD8
- starred false
- pinned false
- text '
- ,
- .
- I'm not in a great mood
- but it's such a small thing
- cold fingers
- an hr of dishes
- what more could I want /s
- also, I had really wanted to tell Phil that he should say hi to my mum, they were in the same city at the same time but I didn't
- it wasn't that funny and we didn't talk
- he's travelling back 👍👍
- I don't know if I'll see him
- 13.25
- my poop is always stenching
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"I\u0027m not in a great mood\n"},{"text":"but it\u0027s such a small thing\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"cold fingers\n"},{"text":"an hr of dishes\n"},{"text":"what more could I want /s\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"also, I had really wanted to tell Phil that he should say hi to my mum, they were in the same city at the same time but I didn\u0027t\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"it wasn\u0027t that funny and we didn\u0027t talk\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"he\u0027s travelling back 👍👍\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I don\u0027t know if I\u0027ll see him\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"13.25\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"my poop is always stenching"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":413},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2023-08-06T08:24:35Z
- modifiedDate 2023-10-28T06:31:39Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid 15178E0E20334EB388944C14D747D28B
- starred false
- pinned false
- text '
- ,
- .
- cold
- so so so cold
- woke up Hella late, got down at 11 am, whole time waiting for my dad to chastise we for church
- he didn't say after lunch, I slipped out and went to my room to sleep , eat and generally hang around
- I had wanted to take a nice refreshing walk.
- I didn't, noticed it was 5
- so I stayed in, glued to my screen
- ignoring Phil
- I texted him before had, that I wasn't feeling up to it
- then I switched off my phone and just stayed off
- watched so much yt
- I could feel my brain melt
- I just wanted that sweet sweet hit of dopamine that gives me life
- and all this after I said on Friday I wouldn't want anymore
- **digital detox anyone**
- I also had a splitting headache, no idea why, drank some water
- I do not know what time I slept
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"cold\n"},{"text":"so so so cold\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"woke up Hella late, got down at 11 am, whole time waiting for my dad to chastise we for church\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"he didn\u0027t say after lunch, I slipped out and went to my room to sleep , eat and generally hang around\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I had wanted to take a nice refreshing walk.\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I didn\u0027t, noticed it was 5\n"},{"text":"so I stayed in, glued to my screen\n"},{"text":"ignoring Phil\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I texted him before had, that I wasn\u0027t feeling up to it\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"then I switched off my phone and just stayed off\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"watched so much yt\n"},{"text":"I could feel my brain melt\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I just wanted that sweet sweet hit of dopamine that gives me life\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"and all this after I said on Friday I wouldn\u0027t want anymore\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"attributes":{"bold":true},"text":"digital detox anyone\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I also had a splitting headache, no idea why, drank some water\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I do not know what time I slept"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":413},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2023-08-05T08:27:36Z
- modifiedDate 2023-10-28T06:31:27Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid B25E5FAA46084C08A7FF409A38FA2B07
- starred false
- pinned false
- text '
- ,
- .
- after struggling to wake up from 8.30 am til 8.59 am
- and I also think I heard dad leave at 7 sth
- I stagger into the study to have my zoom meeting with Ayushi
- it's at 4 pm, fucking UTC time
- I think of sleep again
- at 10.30 ,I join the cyber sec meet that I signed up for, it's ok, kinda basic
- the dude from the UN is ok and answers
- questions
- were so few
- at 11 sth, I see Neackol joins
- at 4.09 to 4.16 pm after faffing around
- I see an email from Ayushi, asking me if I'm joining
- I respond
- rush to the study
- join the zoom
- she is quite curt with me and chastises me a bit
- she is right
- it feels bleak now
- but I'm sure it shall get better for me
- and I will be involved in ensuring that I make my life better
- I'm sure
- I am going to be on top of things
- I am
- felt sad, but I'm on it
- dad came in the evening from athi
- so cold all day,
- watched good omens
- s2
- nice
- left 1 last episode
- ***
- after a whole week ignoring the reason why the exams were extended
- MJ told me she went to school and they said I'd have to be there in person for me to have my portal opened up
- I haven't paid the 4 000
- which adds up to 76,000
- if I don't care about myself
- can I at least care about the money
- fuck
- so I need to get myself together
- I had two plates of githeri, there was nothing else to eat in the house
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"after struggling to wake up from 8.30 am til 8.59 am\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"and I also think I heard dad leave at 7 sth\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I stagger into the study to have my zoom meeting with Ayushi\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"it\u0027s at 4 pm, fucking UTC time\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I think of sleep again\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"at 10.30 ,I join the cyber sec meet that I signed up for, it\u0027s ok, kinda basic\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"the dude from the UN is ok and answers\n"},{"text":"questions\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"were so few\n"},{"text":"at 11 sth, I see Neackol joins\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"at 4.09 to 4.16 pm after faffing around\n"},{"text":"I see an email from Ayushi, asking me if I\u0027m joining\n"},{"text":"I respond\n"},{"text":"rush to the study\n"},{"text":"join the zoom\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"she is quite curt with me and chastises me a bit\n"},{"text":"she is right\n"},{"text":"it feels bleak now\n"},{"text":"but I\u0027m sure it shall get better for me\n"},{"text":"and I will be involved in ensuring that I make my life better\n"},{"text":"I\u0027m sure\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I am going to be on top of things\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I am\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"felt sad, but I\u0027m on it\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"dad came in the evening from athi\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"so cold all day,\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"watched good omens\n"},{"text":"s2\n"},{"text":"nice\n"},{"text":"left 1 last episode\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"embeddedObjects":[{"type":"horizontalRuleLine"}]},{"text":"after a whole week ignoring the reason why the exams were extended\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"MJ told me she went to school and they said I\u0027d have to be there in person for me to have my portal opened up\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I haven\u0027t paid the 4 000\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"which adds up to 76,000\n"},{"text":"if I don\u0027t care about myself\n"},{"text":"can I at least care about the money\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"fuck\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"so I need to get myself together\n\n\n"},{"text":"I had two plates of githeri, there was nothing else to eat in the house\n"},{"text":"\n"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":406},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2023-08-04T06:32:56Z
- modifiedDate 2023-08-06T09:05:41Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid 0889CA6371334F4AAF52ABB9F6E03568
- starred false
- pinned false
- text '
- ,
- .
- mum was leaving to go see Rose in the evening in Mombasa on the sgr
- ate ugali, saw her off in a taxi
- and after literal days and years
- I finished cleaning up the CSV file
- haven't attached it tho
- I talked to Rach at lunch time
- she got off to call her mum and I never got back to her
- it was a lot of faffle
- and I think jobs birthday is tomorrow
- the water was spilling everywhere but not to my room
- after braisonswitched on the valves
- he switched them off to wait for the plumber, who came at 6, and malleted same things
- dad came to
- my water worked in the end
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"mum was leaving to go see Rose in the evening in Mombasa on the sgr\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"ate ugali, saw her off in a taxi\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"and after literal days and years\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I finished cleaning up the CSV file\n"},{"text":"haven\u0027t attached it tho\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I talked to Rach at lunch time\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"she got off to call her mum and I never got back to her\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"it was a lot of faffle\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"and I think jobs birthday is tomorrow\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"the water was spilling everywhere but not to my room\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"after braisonswitched on the valves\n"},{"text":"he switched them off to wait for the plumber, who came at 6, and malleted same things\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"dad came to\n"},{"text":"my water worked in the end"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":406},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2023-08-03T08:33:07Z
- modifiedDate 2023-08-06T09:04:37Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid B6BA7C2033CA415C8393670451A6DB4C
- starred false
- pinned false
- text '
- ,
- .
- my own mother thinks I am a lazy good for nothing.
- her specific complaint was more along the lines of she doesn't see me put in any effort
- and the last time she saw me put in effort was in high school
- then I woke up and slept late to study
- I can't be waking up at 9, 10 am ; when everyone else has gone off to work
- I cant accomplish anything
- I have a hard head, I don't listen. I respond as if I've heard then I leave and do the completely different
- I agree with that summation, I cant promise that if I have an idea is my head, I will drop my idea however bad in favour of yours
- and my bad habits are rubbing off on my brother !!
- Big fucking deal, hes not my son.
- over 5 years, why am I not invested in clearing this hurdle
- nyanya is asking??
- which means we have to get serious
- we really do
- Lillian also outlined a number of problems I would face in the working world.
- about waking up early and doing a task and finishing it
- and being assigned to a supervisor and working in a team etc etc
- paying rent, buying fodd and clothes, all the things that need money
- and for which I need to work for
- and to noones surprise, I agree
- things are going to be so hard for me
- that a little part of me, thinks I should give up.
- and I feel bad for Lillian, who has to deal with being the parent of someone like me
- I am not suffering
- I am not putting in any effort and I have to change
- there is a great deal of work required of me, I cant imagine that Odongo will do the work for me and I will sit back and relax
- I am losing time
- and my mom is losing money
- 50k for Odongo and 55 for Agnes
- ***
- ***
- ***
- ***
- ***
- I know it sounds dumb
- but I hate my hair, I absolutely fucking despise the way it looks and feels
- it so harit pains my head
- it is this like a pencil
- and it's so fucking bad
- it's ugly, I hate it
- I look like a cockroach
- and Phil cant even comfort me
- just fuck
- I made a mistake
- the 6 k was worth it
- I loved my fat little nubbins
- I haven't taken a picture that's how fucking ugly I feel
- I miss my fat spongy babies
- these are hard and compact and I hate them
- I don't even have enough money to hate.
- it's so ugly
- that 3500 was a scam, I hate it
- and I can feel myself starting to hate myself
- like deeply
- it hurts me on the insides
- I feel isolated and alone and I hate my looks
- not even mentioning my fucking weight
- fuck fuck fuck
- jesus
- ***
- **I feel like I have damaged my hair irreversibly**
- I'm fully mad
- I cant isolate coz it will eat me up but I'm mad
- I don't know how this could be any worse
- it's painful and it hurts
- it's ugly, it's hard it's scratchy
- it feels like piece, like braids
- it's so fuckin bad
- I made a mistake
- I also met with Odongo and recorded the convo for my bad head
- also mum said I can't take 10 years to finish something
- I agree
- it hurts but I agree
- I asked mum for pads
- but I somehow end up doing that anyway
- I showered in braisons former room
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"my own mother thinks I am a lazy good for nothing.\n"},{"text":"her specific complaint was more along the lines of she doesn\u0027t see me put in any effort\n"},{"text":"and the last time she saw me put in effort was in high school\n"},{"text":"then I woke up and slept late to study\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I can\u0027t be waking up at 9, 10 am ; when everyone else has gone off to work\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I cant accomplish anything\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I have a hard head, I don\u0027t listen. I respond as if I\u0027ve heard then I leave and do the completely different\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I agree with that summation, I cant promise that if I have an idea is my head, I will drop my idea however bad in favour of yours\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"and my bad habits are rubbing off on my brother !!\n"},{"text":"Big fucking deal, hes not my son.\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"over 5 years, why am I not invested in clearing this hurdle\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"nyanya is asking??\n"},{"text":"which means we have to get serious\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"we really do\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"Lillian also outlined a number of problems I would face in the working world.\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"about waking up early and doing a task and finishing it\n"},{"text":"and being assigned to a supervisor and working in a team etc etc\n"},{"text":"paying rent, buying fodd and clothes, all the things that need money\n"},{"text":"and for which I need to work for\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"and to noones surprise, I agree\n"},{"text":"things are going to be so hard for me\n"},{"text":"that a little part of me, thinks I should give up.\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"and I feel bad for Lillian, who has to deal with being the parent of someone like me\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I am not suffering\n"},{"text":"I am not putting in any effort and I have to change\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"there is a great deal of work required of me, I cant imagine that Odongo will do the work for me and I will sit back and relax\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I am losing time\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"and my mom is losing money\n"},{"text":"50k for Odongo and 55 for Agnes\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"embeddedObjects":[{"type":"horizontalRuleLine"}]},{"embeddedObjects":[{"type":"horizontalRuleLine"}]},{"embeddedObjects":[{"type":"horizontalRuleLine"}]},{"embeddedObjects":[{"type":"horizontalRuleLine"}]},{"embeddedObjects":[{"type":"horizontalRuleLine"}]},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I know it sounds dumb\n"},{"text":"but I hate my hair, I absolutely fucking despise the way it looks and feels\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"it so harit pains my head\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"it is this like a pencil\n"},{"text":"and it\u0027s so fucking bad\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"it\u0027s ugly, I hate it\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I look like a cockroach\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"and Phil cant even comfort me\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"just fuck\n"},{"text":"I made a mistake\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"the 6 k was worth it\n"},{"text":"I loved my fat little nubbins\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I haven\u0027t taken a picture that\u0027s how fucking ugly I feel\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I miss my fat spongy babies\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"these are hard and compact and I hate them\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I don\u0027t even have enough money to hate.\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"it\u0027s so ugly\n"},{"text":"that 3500 was a scam, I hate it\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"and I can feel myself starting to hate myself\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"like deeply\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"it hurts me on the insides\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I feel isolated and alone and I hate my looks\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"not even mentioning my fucking weight\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"fuck fuck fuck\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"jesus\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"embeddedObjects":[{"type":"horizontalRuleLine"}]},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"attributes":{"bold":true},"text":"I feel like I have damaged my hair irreversibly\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I\u0027m fully mad\n"},{"text":"I cant isolate coz it will eat me up but I\u0027m mad\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I don\u0027t know how this could be any worse\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"it\u0027s painful and it hurts\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"it\u0027s ugly, it\u0027s hard it\u0027s scratchy\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"it feels like piece, like braids\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"it\u0027s so fuckin bad\n"},{"text":"I made a mistake\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I also met with Odongo and recorded the convo for my bad head\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"also mum said I can\u0027t take 10 years to finish something\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I agree\n"},{"text":"it hurts but I agree\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I asked mum for pads\n"},{"text":"but I somehow end up doing that anyway\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I showered in braisons former room"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":413},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2023-08-02T10:41:31Z
- modifiedDate 2023-10-28T06:30:40Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid 8AFC67D9CA1147ED81C8A00BCE3A4A6C
- starred false
- pinned false
- text '
- ,
- recollection of yesterday
- told Phil, my cramps were killing me so I didn't talk to him
- he had a hard week too
- I did my hair
- at a place in town and it was bad
- it cost me 3,500
- so 10,000 shillings in the hole
- I also went with Alice to the soko, it was ok
- spent every single penny
- to buy onions, tomatoes
- 1 bunch of bananas
- and cabbages
- rushed home, I had showered
- and I was still on my period
- told mum
- walked off
- boarded a mat
- got to town
- power walked to moi avenue
- got to the salon
- the guy washed my hair
- I haven't been in a chair or a sink for a while
- finished so so late
- and it hurt too
- at 5, my dad waited till 6
- still not done, finished at 7.30 or some shit
- and he sprayed so much stuff in my hair
- and slathered bamboo oil all over
- I walked off
- after I paid all those smackeroos
- on the stairs, I could feel my pad rasping
- but I'd taken an ibuprofen
- and I'd worn dark pants
- walked home, honestly I struggle to remember why I wanted to stay out late, it was scary and I was a bit afraid
- maybe I do need to have a Phil walking me to the stage.
- got to hurlingam at like 8, got a boda, paid
- dad opened for me, he had some doors to be installed
- they wanted to see it, I should off and asid another day
- Alice had cooked beans and ugali
- I ate that and some leftover chapo
- changed my pad downstairs
- it was overflowing
- I prayed because dad paid for my hair,
- slept
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"recollection of yesterday\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"told Phil, my cramps were killing me so I didn\u0027t talk to him\n"},{"text":"he had a hard week too\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I did my hair\n"},{"text":"at a place in town and it was bad\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"it cost me 3,500\n"},{"text":"so 10,000 shillings in the hole\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I also went with Alice to the soko, it was ok\n"},{"text":"spent every single penny\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"to buy onions, tomatoes\n"},{"text":"1 bunch of bananas\n"},{"text":"and cabbages\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"rushed home, I had showered\n"},{"text":"and I was still on my period\n"},{"text":"told mum\n"},{"text":"walked off\n"},{"text":"boarded a mat\n"},{"text":"got to town\n"},{"text":"power walked to moi avenue\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"got to the salon\n"},{"text":"the guy washed my hair\n"},{"text":"I haven\u0027t been in a chair or a sink for a while\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"finished so so late\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"and it hurt too\n"},{"text":"at 5, my dad waited till 6\n"},{"text":"still not done, finished at 7.30 or some shit\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"and he sprayed so much stuff in my hair\n"},{"text":"and slathered bamboo oil all over\n"},{"text":"I walked off\n"},{"text":"after I paid all those smackeroos\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"on the stairs, I could feel my pad rasping\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"but I\u0027d taken an ibuprofen\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"and I\u0027d worn dark pants\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"walked home, honestly I struggle to remember why I wanted to stay out late, it was scary and I was a bit afraid\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"maybe I do need to have a Phil walking me to the stage.\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"got to hurlingam at like 8, got a boda, paid\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"dad opened for me, he had some doors to be installed\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"they wanted to see it, I should off and asid another day\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"Alice had cooked beans and ugali\n"},{"text":"I ate that and some leftover chapo\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"changed my pad downstairs\n"},{"text":"it was overflowing\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I prayed because dad paid for my hair,\n"},{"text":"slept"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":413},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2023-08-01T11:06:07Z
- modifiedDate 2023-10-28T06:30:10Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid 467F4DB28F5145F089F46768113C5001
- starred false
- pinned false
- text '
- ,
- .
- I'm not shitting you, I'm already crmping
- dangerous farts
- my period started and it was a doozy
- I was in pain and it seemed so foreign to me
- at 6 pm, I gave in
- and slept the whole night shivering
- 1. id asked Braison for ibuprofen
- 2. he was unable to get it
- 3. I took some I had and lots of panadol
- 4. mum asked if I was ok
- 5. I didn't see dad
- I bought a small pack of pads
- 8 for 120 bob
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"I\u0027m not shitting you, I\u0027m already crmping\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"dangerous farts\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"my period started and it was a doozy\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I was in pain and it seemed so foreign to me\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"at 6 pm, I gave in\n"},{"text":"and slept the whole night shivering\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"attributes":{"line":{"checked":false,"header":0,"indentLevel":1,"listStyle":"numbered"}},"text":"id asked Braison for ibuprofen\n"},{"attributes":{"line":{"checked":false,"header":0,"indentLevel":1,"listStyle":"numbered"}},"text":"he was unable to get it\n"},{"attributes":{"line":{"checked":false,"header":0,"indentLevel":1,"listStyle":"numbered"}},"text":"I took some I had and lots of panadol\n"},{"attributes":{"line":{"checked":false,"header":0,"indentLevel":1,"listStyle":"numbered"}},"text":"mum asked if I was ok\n"},{"attributes":{"line":{"checked":false,"header":0,"indentLevel":1,"listStyle":"numbered"}},"text":"I didn\u0027t see dad\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I bought a small pack of pads\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"8 for 120 bob\n"},{"text":"\n"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":413},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2023-07-30T22:10:52Z
- modifiedDate 2023-10-23T12:51:21Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid 0245AD285A2C4D97A8C779136444D0CC
- starred false
- pinned false
- text '
- ,
- .
- Phil's not talking to me, no idea why
- and I see his point
- why couldn't he just tell me
- his phones off
- so I guess that's that
- weird dream about dad taking my sheets, had to explain to him that the elastic was loose so it's old and therefore mine
- and the fundis are here to break all the stairs it seems and build them back again. I would rather be down than up
- this is what the man is spending his per diem on.
- ima ask for salon money bro
- cooking lunch
- my mom is a cunt but we already knew that
- in the kitchen finishing up on the bananas
- then boom, my dad comes up behind me in the dining
- tells me he bought me a really fantastic coat. I'd love it etc
- it goes with my dress. I'm thinking it's brown
- ```
- yk what else I'm thinking, I'm thinking this coat is the leather one my mom brought from the us
- that one was Hella ugly
- it was beige with a peplum addition
- I struggle to understand why she would think I liked it
- it's not my style
- ```
- my conclusion is that she thinks it would be a wonderful coat for a 23 year old to have. something she would have loved/liked at her age
- sad and kinda pathetic
- ",
- if you're not over you're own life , and I'm essentially living yours, I'm unsatisfied
- who's living mine
- will I be haranguing sb else to live mine
- anyway, I cant wait to see what kinda coat it is
- bitch, it's the coat
- it's the coat my mom brought 😂😂😂😂
- biiitchhhhhh
- I fucking knew it, I don't know why but I did
- I know these fucking guys
- you fucker , salon on you
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"Phil\u0027s not talking to me, no idea why\n"},{"text":"and I see his point\n"},{"text":"why couldn\u0027t he just tell me\n"},{"text":"his phones off\n"},{"text":"so I guess that\u0027s that\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"weird dream about dad taking my sheets, had to explain to him that the elastic was loose so it\u0027s old and therefore mine\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"and the fundis are here to break all the stairs it seems and build them back again. I would rather be down than up\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"this is what the man is spending his per diem on.\n"},{"text":"ima ask for salon money bro\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"cooking lunch\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"my mom is a cunt but we already knew that\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"in the kitchen finishing up on the bananas\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"then boom, my dad comes up behind me in the dining\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"tells me he bought me a really fantastic coat. I\u0027d love it etc\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"it goes with my dress. I\u0027m thinking it\u0027s brown\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"attributes":{"line":{"codeBlock":true}},"text":"yk what else I\u0027m thinking, I\u0027m thinking this coat is the leather one my mom brought from the us\n"},{"attributes":{"line":{"codeBlock":true}},"text":"that one was Hella ugly\n"},{"attributes":{"line":{"codeBlock":true}},"text":"it was beige with a peplum addition\n"},{"attributes":{"line":{"codeBlock":true}},"text":"I struggle to understand why she would think I liked it\n"},{"attributes":{"line":{"codeBlock":true}},"text":"it\u0027s not my style\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"my conclusion is that she thinks it would be a wonderful coat for a 23 year old to have. something she would have loved/liked at her age\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"sad and kinda pathetic\n"},{"text":"\",\n"},{"text":"if you\u0027re not over you\u0027re own life , and I\u0027m essentially living yours, I\u0027m unsatisfied\n"},{"text":"who\u0027s living mine\n"},{"text":"will I be haranguing sb else to live mine\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"anyway, I cant wait to see what kinda coat it is\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"bitch, it\u0027s the coat\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"it\u0027s the coat my mom brought 😂😂😂😂\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"biiitchhhhhh\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I fucking knew it, I don\u0027t know why but I did\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I know these fucking guys\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"you fucker , salon on you"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":413},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2023-07-30T06:48:20Z
- modifiedDate 2023-10-28T06:29:33Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid 23F186BDD36F4A02B21BBE09914762FE
- starred false
- pinned false
- text '
- ,
- .
- I hate that shit doesn't count
- I really do.
- I did nice things for your for a week , that doesnt hold any water with you at all. it m
- convo w philipdun dun dun dun dun
- sandra
- party
- I should find my life
- I lie too;;;
- now about me
- on sato, woke up, 6ish peed, straight back to bed
- again at 8
- mum had called me, to wake me up
- I screamed yes, then slept again
- lastly Braison knocked thrice
- to wake me
- to tell me they were about to leave
- and to ask me about coming, said I was brushing my teeth
- he also called thrice, finally they left
- I felt quite some guilt eating at me
- and I enjoyed the rest of my day
- I dre
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"I hate that shit doesn\u0027t count\n"},{"text":"I really do.\n"},{"text":"I did nice things for your for a week , that doesnt hold any water with you at all. it m\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"convo w philipdun dun dun dun dun\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":" sandra\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":" party\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I should find my life\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I lie too;;;\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"now about me\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"on sato, woke up, 6ish peed, straight back to bed\n"},{"text":"again at 8\n"},{"text":"mum had called me, to wake me up\n"},{"text":"I screamed yes, then slept again\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"lastly Braison knocked thrice\n"},{"text":"to wake me\n"},{"text":"to tell me they were about to leave\n"},{"text":"and to ask me about coming, said I was brushing my teeth\n"},{"text":"he also called thrice, finally they left\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I felt quite some guilt eating at me\n"},{"text":"and I enjoyed the rest of my day\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I dre"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":413},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2023-07-29T06:41:32Z
- modifiedDate 2023-10-28T06:29:19Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid AF4BA8E5AF7B42EEA0346EE4D1E66E29
- starred false
- pinned false
- text '
- ,
- .
- h
- `long fucking day, ill tell you all about it`
- ***
- at home:
- my parents also had a long long lecture w Braison.
- they're really insisting on obedience this time
- and as I knelt there, listening to snatches of conversation
- I said to myself, 😂 learn and unlearn baby
- just before I slept, mum told me that they were going to newlife tomorrow, very early
- I said ok
- in my parents mind, this counts as an agreement
- nooo
- you said sth and I heard
- I don't agree for shit
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"h\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"attributes":{"inlineCode":true},"text":"long fucking day, ill tell you all about it\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"embeddedObjects":[{"type":"horizontalRuleLine"}]},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"at home:\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"my parents also had a long long lecture w Braison.\n"},{"text":"they\u0027re really insisting on obedience this time\n"},{"text":"and as I knelt there, listening to snatches of conversation\n"},{"text":"I said to myself, 😂 learn and unlearn baby\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"just before I slept, mum told me that they were going to newlife tomorrow, very early\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I said ok\n"},{"text":"in my parents mind, this counts as an agreement\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"nooo\n"},{"text":"you said sth and I heard\n"},{"text":"I don\u0027t agree for shit\n"},{"text":"\n"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":404},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2023-07-28T14:13:52Z
- modifiedDate 2023-07-31T11:19:38Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid D58DEB3D59F24002BC1779CDB1A13550
- starred false
- pinned false
- text '
- ,
- .
- you are not a bad person
- I am not a bad person
- I am not bad
- I am not bad
- I am not bad
- it feels too loose already
- but cut yourself some slack
- met a missionary from Uganda, called carl
- inviting people to study the bible
- I don't know why I'm pissed, he's done nothing wrong
- but I didn't want to meet people from the office so yeah
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"you are not a bad person\n"},{"text":"I am not a bad person\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I am not bad\n"},{"text":"I am not bad\n"},{"text":"I am not bad\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"it feels too loose already\n"},{"text":"but cut yourself some slack\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"met a missionary from Uganda, called carl\n"},{"text":"inviting people to study the bible\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I don\u0027t know why I\u0027m pissed, he\u0027s done nothing wrong\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"but I didn\u0027t want to meet people from the office so yeah"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":404},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2023-07-27T08:37:18Z
- modifiedDate 2023-07-31T11:19:42Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid ED46578AE6C74A41AB27D07BC9D9BC16
- starred false
- pinned false
- text '
- ,
- .
- woke up at 6
- lazy
- slept again, woke up at 9
- I overslept and I feel like shit
- my farts are insane , my poops are insane
- wanna hear what my supportive ass dad said, I'll wash the car, take a day off and come support you on the day
- bull fuckin crap
- couldn't believe he said that
- you couldn't support we elsewhere, you thought that was the plan
- jfc
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"woke up at 6\n"},{"text":"lazy\n"},{"text":"slept again, woke up at 9\n"},{"text":"I overslept and I feel like shit\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"my farts are insane , my poops are insane\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"wanna hear what my supportive ass dad said, I\u0027ll wash the car, take a day off and come support you on the day\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"bull fuckin crap\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"couldn\u0027t believe he said that\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"you couldn\u0027t support we elsewhere, you thought that was the plan\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"jfc"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":404},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2023-07-26T06:26:21Z
- modifiedDate 2023-07-31T11:19:44Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid 79AE142497014893AF6283DE633E9B36
- starred false
- pinned false
- text '
- ,
- .
- am I fully over yesterday
- idk man
- the fear this woman incites in me, and the fucking audacity to try and treat me like an adult one second and a child the next
- did you think I went and threw your money at them, insinuate sth about me not being responsible
- then fuck fucking fuck
- I am comforted that I wont remember this in a bit
- I remember the instances but not the words
- I remember getting so het up about my parents reciting my shortcomings
- I wrote all that shit down to be better but fuck all that
- I'm not giving it my energy
- education is power, power to leave all this
- learnand unlearn babe
- I'm would wager that you're not supposed to be feeling like fighting your mother any time she raises her voice
- I had a nice day eating and seeing my cousins
- missed them, they're so tall
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"am I fully over yesterday\n"},{"text":"idk man\n"},{"text":"the fear this woman incites in me, and the fucking audacity to try and treat me like an adult one second and a child the next\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"did you think I went and threw your money at them, insinuate sth about me not being responsible\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"then fuck fucking fuck\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I am comforted that I wont remember this in a bit\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I remember the instances but not the words\n"},{"text":"I remember getting so het up about my parents reciting my shortcomings\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I wrote all that shit down to be better but fuck all that\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I\u0027m not giving it my energy\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"education is power, power to leave all this\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"learnand unlearn babe\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I\u0027m would wager that you\u0027re not supposed to be feeling like fighting your mother any time she raises her voice\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I had a nice day eating and seeing my cousins\n"},{"text":"missed them, they\u0027re so tall"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":404},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2023-07-22T22:15:38Z
- modifiedDate 2023-07-31T11:19:47Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid BC9980CB517E4F4DB7BFB80DCF2FE055
- starred false
- pinned false
- text '
- ,
- .
- got to church
- hella late, prepping to be inflamed, righteous inflammation in the name of God
- I hope I sit alone, the farts are deadly
- I am so self conscious that I can feel my plum cheeks inflame
- half of me wants to be proud?? ; okwith my weight
- the rest of me is like, I judge fatties, why shant I be judged
- so I should be uncomfortable,sick in that stomach
- and I'm not wrong for me to be wondering what my mom will see, because even when nat in the presence of people she will still pick me out so...
- also woke up and felt some loneliness alone
- I am farting dangerously and
- 12.35
- the sermon hast even started and it's already
- inflammatory
- and I get what my mom was saying
- ninjas are so fucking loud. you don't need to pause for a full minute to make a point
- it's so loud, this is why i sit in the back
- sth about childrens' teachers going through a hard time. I agree
- the meat and the foodafter all that, she acts like a fucking cunt.
- intertwined with all this madness, this fury and rage, the fuckin audacity, I really wanted to just walk away
- I wonder why she doesn't love me.
- but fuck her
- fuck her
- fuck her
- this slut,
- when she was 23, where was she. in zimma. with a child, a literal toddler worrying about her.
- fuck that noise.
- you think you have the guide on how to be 23, last person I'd ever want to learn from
- I don't receive that
- I don't agree with all of that
- I felt it was hurtful, maybe unwarranted. not incorporating my needs etc etc
- and I think it's wrong.
- What are her expectations babe?
- I don't know and
- I don't care,
- she can shove it up her ass
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"got to church\n"},{"text":"hella late, prepping to be inflamed, righteous inflammation in the name of God\n"},{"text":"I hope I sit alone, the farts are deadly\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I am so self conscious that I can feel my plum cheeks inflame\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"half of me wants to be proud?? ; okwith my weight\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"the rest of me is like, I judge fatties, why shant I be judged\n"},{"text":"so I should be uncomfortable,sick in that stomach\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"and I\u0027m not wrong for me to be wondering what my mom will see, because even when nat in the presence of people she will still pick me out so...\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"also woke up and felt some loneliness alone\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I am farting dangerously and\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"12.35\n"},{"text":"the sermon hast even started and it\u0027s already\n"},{"text":"inflammatory\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"and I get what my mom was saying\n"},{"text":"ninjas are so fucking loud. you don\u0027t need to pause for a full minute to make a point\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"it\u0027s so loud, this is why i sit in the back\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"sth about childrens\u0027 teachers going through a hard time. I agree\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"the meat and the foodafter all that, she acts like a fucking cunt.\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"intertwined with all this madness, this fury and rage, the fuckin audacity, I really wanted to just walk away\n"},{"text":"I wonder why she doesn\u0027t love me.\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"but fuck her\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"fuck her\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"fuck her\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"this slut,\n"},{"text":"when she was 23, where was she. in zimma. with a child, a literal toddler worrying about her.\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"fuck that noise.\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"you think you have the guide on how to be 23, last person I\u0027d ever want to learn from\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I don\u0027t receive that\n"},{"text":"I don\u0027t agree with all of that\n"},{"text":"I felt it was hurtful, maybe unwarranted. not incorporating my needs etc etc\n"},{"text":"and I think it\u0027s wrong.\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"What are her expectations babe?\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I don\u0027t know and\n"},{"text":"I don\u0027t care,\n"},{"text":"she can shove it up her ass"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":404},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2023-07-22T08:00:57Z
- modifiedDate 2023-07-31T11:19:53Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid 4CD787BD8EBF4392B15C61E450AFE266
- starred false
- pinned false
- text '
- ,
- .
- started with despondency and hate
- hope then jealousy and aware of my crazyness
- incredible loneliness
- incredible, credible loneliness
- I also stepped out to buy cake
- I saw how fat my face was, felt bad
- I also did not share my cake, felt bad
- back hurts
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"started with despondency and hate\n\n"},{"text":"hope then jealousy and aware of my crazyness\n"},{"text":"incredible loneliness\n\n"},{"text":"incredible, credible loneliness\n\n"},{"text":"I also stepped out to buy cake\n\n"},{"text":"I saw how fat my face was, felt bad\n\n"},{"text":"I also did not share my cake, felt bad\n\n"},{"text":"back hurts\n\n\n"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":404},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2023-07-20T12:27:08Z
- modifiedDate 2023-07-20T12:36:54Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid BAA238D7825F47FCBEFC56B4F81F9A1E
- starred false
- pinned false
- text '
- ,
- .
- nais corner, really spoke to me, do I think I am a chronic liar because I am protecting myself
- a survival tactic I picked up to protect myself from pain or perceived injustices
- itl overstayed and I need to move it on
- it does not align with the Nigel, I want to be
- also I've been on this insta trend, I found the loc person
- I've been stalking people pages
- I'm about get off, and get off fr
- but I been jealous. I been jealous.
- ppl are on goals, they're movin movin
- and I'm jealous/envious
- I don't really think that I want to be on whatever it is they're doing. but they look happy and I want the chance to be happy to, I don't think their happiness has squashed my chance of happiness. but I want to be happy to
- and I don't feel that way right now,
- it's not their fault but yeah
- like what you got going on
- life diverges but damn
- why ain't I got nuthn going on.
- damn
- maybe I'm am jealous
- ableism??
- misogynoir
- misandrist
- 23.50
- ive been in a slump and I want to get out of it
- noooooo
- aaah
- should I feel weird for not wanting to cook
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"nais corner, really spoke to me, do I think I am a chronic liar because I am protecting myself\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"a survival tactic I picked up to protect myself from pain or perceived injustices\n"},{"text":"itl overstayed and I need to move it on\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"it does not align with the Nigel, I want to be\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"also I\u0027ve been on this insta trend, I found the loc person\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I\u0027ve been stalking people pages\n"},{"text":"I\u0027m about get off, and get off fr\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"but I been jealous. I been jealous.\n"},{"text":"ppl are on goals, they\u0027re movin movin\n"},{"text":"and I\u0027m jealous/envious\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I don\u0027t really think that I want to be on whatever it is they\u0027re doing. but they look happy and I want the chance to be happy to, I don\u0027t think their happiness has squashed my chance of happiness. but I want to be happy to\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"and I don\u0027t feel that way right now,\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"it\u0027s not their fault but yeah\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"like what you got going on\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"life diverges but damn\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"why ain\u0027t I got nuthn going on.\n"},{"text":"damn\n"},{"text":"maybe I\u0027m am jealous\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"ableism??\n"},{"text":"misogynoir\n"},{"text":"misandrist\n\n\n\n\n\n"},{"text":"23.50\n\n"},{"text":"ive been in a slump and I want to get out of it\n\n"},{"text":"noooooo\n"},{"text":"aaah\n\n"},{"text":"should I feel weird for not wanting to cook"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":404},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2023-07-19T02:20:16Z
- modifiedDate 2023-07-19T20:57:39Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid 50A08013B4F14B18AC5DB0D2372DB9F1
- starred false
- pinned false
- text '
- ,
- .
- 2 pm
- yes, I woke up late and it was shitty,
- but I really turned it around
- I set my clothes to wash, I cleaned my room, mopped all that shit up and cleaned up to my bathroom.
- I did my second load of laundry, removed my sheets, cleaned up abit of clutter so I wasn't so bad,
- unwrapped some old clothes, I put on some weight so I might have to use them all the same,
- I feel swell
- I'm also so hungry, ate some 1000 calories in nuts and avocados
- I talked to Phil, I miss him
- I want to be in his life, I don't wanna interact with his family tho
- he told me about his day , the shitty auditors
- and that he'd like to fuck me
- yay🎉
- really not an the same page, and he wants waht he wants
- I want it ??? it
- I want that (wtf) too.
- but I wistfully remember, that day at museum, a few days?? after I said yes to dating him
- which also meant being his girlfriend (I wasn't on the same page about that)
- but I wasn agains it so hear we are
- and I thought I liked it
- but I want a friend.
- fr, fr. after all the passion is over, we all need someone to lean on
- the whys and the whys and the whys
- and I think of the Philip who said he wouldn't pressure me, he didn't have any expectations of me as ' his 🤷 girlfriend '
- and I think of the Phil of a few days ago.
- who said he really wanted human, my , touch and of course I agreed. I felt the same way.
- and the Phil who wants to kiss in public when I'm still not over PDA,
- and tho Phil who's always bringing up talking to his sister, his nephew, his mom. ' as a a joke' when I'm still not there yet.
- all this Phil's Vs the Phil I agreed to date , who in the beginning, I didn't know much about
- and I wonder, am I doing this because I want to or because I'm being pulled along
- and the phil who's like I want to fuck u. it'll be the most intimate thing😮💨. and I want that experience too. I fantasize and masturbate to shit like that. sooo
- and I still want a friend.
- I don't think lying to friends is good, lying that I have someone I talk to about my relationship is the best
- and lying about clubbing
- like why the fuck y'all, why am I doing all this
- jesus
- I want a something, or someone I don't have
- I'm not sure if they were ever there
- and I wonder if I can't communicate that, I wonder if I can bear the thought of letting go
- this wouldn't be fair to the man, he has wants too
- and I Want as well
- midnight:
- my saying sorry is probably annoying, coz I've heard it back and it sounds super awful
- what is a boundary
- is me not wanting to talk to your family a boundary, coz it's fucking annoying
- I don't want to , it makes me uncomfy
- I also realise that me not wanting to do things, is a shitty excuse
- and I should get off it
- is sex the most intimate thing, even with a person you're pretty sure you love
- I don't know, I wouldn't bet on it.
- yeah if I voice the opinion that *no*, piv sex , as a matter of fact might not be super fucking intimate
- To Me
- it's gonna be like, oooh you don't want to, I'm not seeing effort, I'm not seeing you act
- fuck fucking fuck
- you don't act remorseful, you don't act like you fucking want it
- jfc
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"2 pm\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"yes, I woke up late and it was shitty,\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"but I really turned it around\n"},{"text":"I set my clothes to wash, I cleaned my room, mopped all that shit up and cleaned up to my bathroom.\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I did my second load of laundry, removed my sheets, cleaned up abit of clutter so I wasn\u0027t so bad,\n"},{"text":"unwrapped some old clothes, I put on some weight so I might have to use them all the same,\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I feel swell\n"},{"text":"I\u0027m also so hungry, ate some 1000 calories in nuts and avocados\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I talked to Phil, I miss him\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I want to be in his life, I don\u0027t wanna interact with his family tho\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"he told me about his day , the shitty auditors\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"and that he\u0027d like to fuck me\n"},{"text":"yay🎉\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"really not an the same page, and he wants waht he wants\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I want it ??? it\n"},{"text":"I want that (wtf) too.\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"but I wistfully remember, that day at museum, a few days?? after I said yes to dating him\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"which also meant being his girlfriend (I wasn\u0027t on the same page about that)\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"but I wasn agains it so hear we are\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"and I thought I liked it\n"},{"text":"but I want a friend.\n"},{"text":"fr, fr. after all the passion is over, we all need someone to lean on\n"},{"text":"the whys and the whys and the whys\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"and I think of the Philip who said he wouldn\u0027t pressure me, he didn\u0027t have any expectations of me as \u0027 his 🤷 girlfriend \u0027\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"and I think of the Phil of a few days ago.\n"},{"text":"who said he really wanted human, my , touch and of course I agreed. I felt the same way.\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"and the Phil who wants to kiss in public when I\u0027m still not over PDA,\n"},{"text":"and tho Phil who\u0027s always bringing up talking to his sister, his nephew, his mom. \u0027 as a a joke\u0027 when I\u0027m still not there yet.\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"all this Phil\u0027s Vs the Phil I agreed to date , who in the beginning, I didn\u0027t know much about\n"},{"text":"and I wonder, am I doing this because I want to or because I\u0027m being pulled along\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"and the phil who\u0027s like I want to fuck u. it\u0027ll be the most intimate thing😮💨. and I want that experience too. I fantasize and masturbate to shit like that. sooo\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"and I still want a friend.\n"},{"text":"I don\u0027t think lying to friends is good, lying that I have someone I talk to about my relationship is the best\n"},{"text":"and lying about clubbing\n"},{"text":"like why the fuck y\u0027all, why am I doing all this\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"jesus\n"},{"text":"I want a something, or someone I don\u0027t have\n"},{"text":"I\u0027m not sure if they were ever there\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"and I wonder if I can\u0027t communicate that, I wonder if I can bear the thought of letting go\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"this wouldn\u0027t be fair to the man, he has wants too\n"},{"text":"and I Want as well\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"midnight:\n"},{"text":"my saying sorry is probably annoying, coz I\u0027ve heard it back and it sounds super awful\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"what is a boundary\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"is me not wanting to talk to your family a boundary, coz it\u0027s fucking annoying\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I don\u0027t want to , it makes me uncomfy\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I also realise that me not wanting to do things, is a shitty excuse\n"},{"text":"and I should get off it\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"is sex the most intimate thing, even with a person you\u0027re pretty sure you love\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I don\u0027t know, I wouldn\u0027t bet on it.\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"yeah if I voice the opinion that "},{"attributes":{"italic":true},"text":"no "},{"text":", piv sex , as a matter of fact might not be super fucking intimate\n"},{"text":" To Me\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"it\u0027s gonna be like, oooh you don\u0027t want to, I\u0027m not seeing effort, I\u0027m not seeing you act\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"fuck fucking fuck\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"you don\u0027t act remorseful, you don\u0027t act like you fucking want it\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"jfc"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":413},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2023-07-18T20:21:42Z
- modifiedDate 2023-10-28T06:28:22Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid 098510816F314941BFB1833784464F32
- starred false
- pinned false
- text '
- ,
- .
- I feel like absolute shit
- I have woken up with a great amount of self loathing
- I shall not fan the flames but I feel bad
- feels really bad man.
- the constant nonstop feeling of wanting to do things but not doing them is insane.
- and it makes me feel like all levels of shit
- I want to be intentional and then do said intentions
- fuck fuck fuck
- I hate myself this morning
- this afternoon I mean
- jesus fucking Christ
- i wanted to take this week to really do my work,
- no interruptions
- I feel so shitty for not getting up
- but I can be salvaged
- also I watched tv-pc for a bit while applying ointment last night and I feel good
- like I was trying hard not to itch and I didn't
- so good head stuff all around
- 23:38 pm
- I actually wanna puke, nobody loves me like I wanna ; and I love no one, and I don't put in the effort to love anyone
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"I feel like absolute shit\n"},{"text":"I have woken up with a great amount of self loathing\n"},{"text":"I shall not fan the flames but I feel bad\n"},{"text":"feels really bad man.\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"the constant nonstop feeling of wanting to do things but not doing them is insane.\n"},{"text":"and it makes me feel like all levels of shit\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I want to be intentional and then do said intentions\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"fuck fuck fuck\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I hate myself this morning\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"this afternoon I mean\n"},{"text":"jesus fucking Christ\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"i wanted to take this week to really do my work,\n"},{"text":"no interruptions\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I feel so shitty for not getting up\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"but I can be salvaged\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"also I watched tv-pc for a bit while applying ointment last night and I feel good\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"like I was trying hard not to itch and I didn\u0027t\n"},{"text":"so good head stuff all around\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"23:38 pm\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I actually wanna puke, nobody loves me like I wanna ; and I love no one, and I don\u0027t put in the effort to love anyone"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":397},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2023-07-17T09:28:01Z
- modifiedDate 2023-07-18T21:38:57Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid E42C1F14DE5E4586ADFF5B2CCD475BE0
- starred false
- pinned false
- text I need to change my ways
- really
- I'm 23, a growin woman
- dad left and I feel like shit, I haven't seen him, said bye, prayed for him, didn't see him last night, Friday, for a bit as we ate
- I feel like a whore, or just a really bad person
- I've cum but it wasn't that good or bad, just there
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"I need to change my ways\n"},{"text":"really\n"},{"text":"I\u0027m 23, a growin woman\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"dad left and I feel like shit, I haven\u0027t seen him, said bye, prayed for him, didn\u0027t see him last night, Friday, for a bit as we ate\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I feel like a whore, or just a really bad person\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I\u0027ve cum but it wasn\u0027t that good or bad, just there"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":404},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2023-07-16T10:11:05Z
- modifiedDate 2023-07-22T22:25:42Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid 8891A0019C074E6B92104C8D39F8A3A3
- starred false
- pinned false
- text late sleep, early morning
- late woke up, didn't accompany fam to church
- felt ok, paecy, arranged all my cleanlaundry,
- on the way to wash dirt's
- lunch, Alice cooks Alice cleans
- dad is extremely mad about my non church goingness
- I'm not surprised and I am a little scared.
- he was fixing something, he came out with a panga straight at me, for ⅒ of a second, I was like, he's gonna get me.
- of course not, but he came to talk to me, a few sentences about how he disagrees with my behaviour
- he was mad, I was scared of what he would do to me, nothing
- a loooongg fucking talk
- he is downstairs and I feel some sort of shame, so I'm hiding upstairs till he's gone
- 5.45 pm
- I have come so hard. I'm so ✨
- I've never done that before
- I clicked on some links, the usual. fast etc etc
- internet was acting up so I *stood* a little closer to my cupboard and I started rubbing
- I'm going at it so hard, I see a clothespin , pinch my nipple
- I am continuing to rub, stick an eyebrow pencil
- up my vaginal canal. poke it in a bit
- still rubbing so hard, it all feels so good
- lots of brown goop is coming out, I cant stop in the middle
- I keep going
- I miss, it was so good, I feel sleepy afterwardit was so nice.
- I clean up all my brown discharge
- lots of goop on the pencil, some on the top
- wipe away the oil
- clean my cooch up, some soap, water
- I feel so good after
- I also feel like I can confirm, I can say with confidence ' I am a kinky woman'
- I don't know if I can get this with a man
- Even though props to Phil, he's put in some really solid strides
- still hate yesterdays comment though
- and I have had the strangest week in my discharge history ever
- Everr
- lots of hot brown goop, so particularly strange smell
- at least nothing my nose thinks is out of the ordinary
- sooo much forkin discharge
- brown, like old blood
- coating the insides of my canal
- I hope I haven't hurt myself or scratched myself digging for it
- hot blooms, stained undies
- need new undies
- 23.56
- almost a new day, I rubbed again and came again
- it was ok,
- no cooking, ate chapo and rancid granola
- ha ha charity
- I miss Phil, it's incredible how much I miss him
- I wanna choke on his dick, I wanna hug him tight
- I want to lick his nipples, I want him to bite mine
- I miss you Phil, and I am thinking about you and about being with you
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"late sleep, early morning\n"},{"text":"late woke up, didn\u0027t accompany fam to church\n"},{"text":"felt ok, paecy, arranged all my cleanlaundry,\n"},{"text":"on the way to wash dirt\u0027s\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"lunch, Alice cooks Alice cleans\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"dad is extremely mad about my non church goingness\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I\u0027m not surprised and I am a little scared.\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"he was fixing something, he came out with a panga straight at me, for ⅒ of a second, I was like, he\u0027s gonna get me.\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"of course not, but he came to talk to me, a few sentences about how he disagrees with my behaviour\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"he was mad, I was scared of what he would do to me, nothing\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"a loooongg fucking talk\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"he is downstairs and I feel some sort of shame, so I\u0027m hiding upstairs till he\u0027s gone\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"5.45 pm\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I have come so hard. I\u0027m so ✨\n"},{"text":"I\u0027ve never done that before\n"},{"text":"I clicked on some links, the usual. fast etc etc\n"},{"text":"internet was acting up so I "},{"attributes":{"italic":true},"text":"stood"},{"text":" a little closer to my cupboard and I started rubbing\n"},{"text":"I\u0027m going at it so hard, I see a clothespin , pinch my nipple\n"},{"text":"I am continuing to rub, stick an eyebrow pencil\n"},{"text":"up my vaginal canal. poke it in a bit\n"},{"text":"still rubbing so hard, it all feels so good\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"lots of brown goop is coming out, I cant stop in the middle\n"},{"text":"I keep going\n"},{"text":"I miss, it was so good, I feel sleepy afterwardit was so nice.\n"},{"text":"I clean up all my brown discharge\n"},{"text":"lots of goop on the pencil, some on the top\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"wipe away the oil\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"clean my cooch up, some soap, water\n"},{"text":"I feel so good after\n"},{"text":"I also feel like I can confirm, I can say with confidence \u0027 I am a kinky woman\u0027\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I don\u0027t know if I can get this with a man\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"Even though props to Phil, he\u0027s put in some really solid strides\n"},{"text":"still hate yesterdays comment though\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"and I have had the strangest week in my discharge history ever\n"},{"text":"Everr\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"lots of hot brown goop, so particularly strange smell\n"},{"text":"at least nothing my nose thinks is out of the ordinary\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"sooo much forkin discharge\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"brown, like old blood\n"},{"text":"coating the insides of my canal\n"},{"text":"I hope I haven\u0027t hurt myself or scratched myself digging for it\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"hot blooms, stained undies\n"},{"text":"need new undies\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"23.56\n"},{"text":"almost a new day, I rubbed again and came again\n"},{"text":"it was ok,\n"},{"text":"no cooking, ate chapo and rancid granola\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"ha ha charity\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I miss Phil, it\u0027s incredible how much I miss him\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I wanna choke on his dick, I wanna hug him tight\n"},{"text":"I want to lick his nipples, I want him to bite mine\n"},{"text":"I miss you Phil, and I am thinking about you and about being with you"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":413},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2023-07-15T11:20:32Z
- modifiedDate 2023-10-28T06:27:35Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid 989B624B666B4CC99A92ECAF252A827B
- starred false
- pinned false
- text a
- b
- c
- I
- e
- f
- g
- 2 hot blooms, is anything wrong with my womb
- 15th is tomorrow, I need to see the doctoro
- Itch but no dandruff
- ask for appt???
- saw Phil,
- once the passion ends, dost thou havest a best friend
- I'm not sure
- I'll miss him \& ill have to find out why I don't wanna see him
- got a dread shop, 3500 tho
- ill get it from the sacco
- I'll ask dad
- I'll text that french guy \& see
- it's 5 pm, so fuckin late. when will I get home???? fuck
- this used to be fun for me, what changed
- ''' when you gonna tell her""
- got home at 8.30,
- scared shiver
- discharge all day, 2 hot blooms
- why would I like it
- njaathaaaaa
- god, Njatha
- fuck
- ill remember to greet mum for him
- dadas gone be gone on Sunday, party up
- get money for hair and buy fruits
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"a\n"},{"text":"b\n"},{"text":"c\n"},{"text":"I\n"},{"text":"e\n"},{"text":"f\n"},{"text":"g\n"},{"text":"2 hot blooms, is anything wrong with my womb\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"15th is tomorrow, I need to see the doctoro\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"Itch but no dandruff\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"ask for appt???\n"},{"text":"saw Phil,\n"},{"text":"once the passion ends, dost thou havest a best friend\n"},{"text":"I\u0027m not sure\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I\u0027ll miss him \u0026 ill have to find out why I don\u0027t wanna see him\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"got a dread shop, 3500 tho\n"},{"text":"ill get it from the sacco\n"},{"text":"I\u0027ll ask dad\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I\u0027ll text that french guy \u0026 see\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"it\u0027s 5 pm, so fuckin late. when will I get home???? fuck\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"this used to be fun for me, what changed\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\u0027\u0027\u0027 when you gonna tell her\"\"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"got home at 8.30,\n"},{"text":"scared shiver\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"discharge all day, 2 hot blooms\n"},{"text":"why would I like it\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"njaathaaaaa\n"},{"text":"god, Njatha\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"fuck\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"ill remember to greet mum for him\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"dadas gone be gone on Sunday, party up\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"get money for hair and buy fruits"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":413},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2023-07-14T13:45:05Z
- modifiedDate 2023-10-28T06:27:10Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid 1B848D11F0C343518D05095AA5D72F9A
- starred false
- pinned false
- text Cramps so bad,
- poop change
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"Cramps so bad,\n"},{"text":"poop change\n"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":397},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2023-07-13T18:10:13Z
- modifiedDate 2023-07-13T18:10:51Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid 3CDFA4D69D64432B81B529C8AB966818
- starred false
- pinned false
- text Crown of head itch
- 9.53 pm
- I just wanted to note that it's tit for tat babes
- So I, asked Phil. and it was turn back on me.
- I don't like itz
- Feel annoyed at myself for being a wuss
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"Crown of head itch\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"9.53 pm\n"},{"text":"I just wanted to note that it\u0027s tit for tat babes\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"So I, asked Phil. and it was turn back on me.\n"},{"text":"I don\u0027t like itz\n"},{"text":"Feel annoyed at myself for being a wuss"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":413},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2023-07-11T11:46:14Z
- modifiedDate 2023-10-28T06:27:07Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid 8571AA59139B41A787B9295483F272B0
- starred false
- pinned false
- text Visited Rose's family yesterday
- Nyareso , the psych was nice
- My head is so calm
- After my shower yesterday, super incredible
- No itch
- Preserve this with the ointment
- 11.48
- Maybe I'm a hater but goddamn
- 2,000
- Let's be grateful tho
- 😂🥲 furk
- 2k, a book
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"Visited Rose\u0027s family yesterday\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"Nyareso , the psych was nice\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"My head is so calm\n"},{"text":"After my shower yesterday, super incredible\n"},{"text":"No itch\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"Preserve this with the ointment\n\n\n"},{"text":"11.48\n"},{"text":"Maybe I\u0027m a hater but goddamn\n"},{"text":"2,000\n"},{"text":"Let\u0027s be grateful tho\n"},{"text":"😂🥲 furk\n\n"},{"text":"2k, a book"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":397},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2023-07-10T08:09:04Z
- modifiedDate 2023-07-10T08:50:04Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid 16ABC5644D0D4A2ABA401B0B28D11EB5
- starred false
- pinned false
- text Church today after 3 ish weeks
- Church is very inflammatory, lots of deifying and pedestalling
- and god can't give me methylphenidate so
- fuck im
- 20:28
- I feel like I don't go out of my way to hurt people to hurt people feelings, or to say sth mean. I feel like I intentionally shut my mouth so I don't hurt people but no one is doing that to me.
- Does my hair dictate my inherent worthiness
- I've gotten that letting go comment from 2 people, and I'm afraid I'm dating my mom
- ![](dayone-moment://4BC9581239D24AC38502D55561A57DA2)
- she did, then I gravitated towards a man who fills those spaces
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"Church today after 3 ish weeks\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"Church is very inflammatory, lots of deifying and pedestalling\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"and god can\u0027t give me methylphenidate so\n"},{"text":"fuck im\n\n"},{"text":"20:28\n"},{"text":"I feel like I don\u0027t go out of my way to hurt people to hurt people feelings, or to say sth mean. I feel like I intentionally shut my mouth so I don\u0027t hurt people but no one is doing that to me.\n"},{"text":"Does my hair dictate my inherent worthiness\n\n"},{"text":"I\u0027ve gotten that letting go comment from 2 people, and I\u0027m afraid I\u0027m dating my mom\n\n\n"},{"embeddedObjects":[{"identifier":"4BC9581239D24AC38502D55561A57DA2","type":"photo"}]},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"she did, then I gravitated towards a man who fills those spaces"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":397},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2023-07-08T10:24:47Z
- modifiedDate 2023-07-08T17:36:09Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- photos
- identifier 4BC9581239D24AC38502D55561A57DA2
- md5 7c84c8b7ece37b21087d025f3caa7bcc
- type jpg
- fileSize 0
- orderInEntry 0
- height 0
- width 0
- favorite false
- duration 0
- exposureBiasValue 0
- md5Thumbnail 7c84c8b7ece37b21087d025f3caa7bcc
- v
- uuid 16532A60D10C40808652FF3DD8F1C3D0
- starred false
- pinned false
- text My stomach cramps so bad each time my gut wants me to poop
- Lillian is continuing on the being nice to me train, only God knows why
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"My stomach cramps so bad each time my gut wants me to poop\n\n"},{"text":"Lillian is continuing on the being nice to me train, only God knows why"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":397},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2023-07-06T07:00:33Z
- modifiedDate 2023-07-06T07:01:31Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid E8D4E56C8C3C44058C65CF10E0E17ECF
- starred false
- pinned false
- text What do I think neurotypical people are doing in my position
- what am I struggling with that a neurotypical person may be doing different or better
- And do I think I've ever worked hard, I don't think having ADHD means I can't work hard.
- Why would it mean I cant work hard, so many ppl who have ADHD work soo hard, why cant i
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"What do I think neurotypical people are doing in my position\n\n"},{"text":"what am I struggling with that a neurotypical person may be doing different or better\n\n"},{"text":"And do I think I\u0027ve ever worked hard, I don\u0027t think having ADHD means I can\u0027t work hard.\n"},{"text":"Why would it mean I cant work hard, so many ppl who have ADHD work soo hard, why cant i"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":397},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2023-07-05T12:38:12Z
- modifiedDate 2023-07-05T12:42:10Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid 10FBA4BF392C4B7783F5E0A0EB318A7E
- starred false
- pinned false
- text My head is really itchy tonight, head flares all over my head, so fucking itchy
- Ointment kinda worked on certain spots
- but it's itchy and I don't know what to do
- more shampoo, dries we out
- More ointment, stinky, can't sleep
- 3.30 pm
- Still fuckin itchy
- Apply Tacroz
- **My wellbeing**
- Physical
- Emotional
- Spiritual
- Mental
- Don't live in denial
- Displacement of bad emotions
- I don't feel like my scalp is getting better
- It's still itchy as hell.
- Feels burning sensation
- I feel like I am going through a flare up, because I am under a form of stress.
- I am stressed by school as usual.
- I want to get rid of the stress, I hate that last minute shit
- If I spend my time, ridding myself of the project, then I can chill. My scalp can chill
- and my flare can calm down
- 23.39
- minor itch at night, calm all over.
- do it again tomorrow
- bad mood at 4pm,didn't want Philip to see my face,
- cutty, I apologize
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"My head is really itchy tonight, head flares all over my head, so fucking itchy\n"},{"text":"Ointment kinda worked on certain spots\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"but it\u0027s itchy and I don\u0027t know what to do\n"},{"text":"more shampoo, dries we out\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"More ointment, stinky, can\u0027t sleep\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"3.30 pm\n"},{"text":"Still fuckin itchy\n"},{"text":"Apply Tacroz\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"attributes":{"bold":true},"text":"My wellbeing\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"Physical\n"},{"text":"Emotional\n"},{"text":"Spiritual\n"},{"text":"Mental\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"Don\u0027t live in denial\n"},{"text":"Displacement of bad emotions\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I don\u0027t feel like my scalp is getting better\n"},{"text":"It\u0027s still itchy as hell.\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"Feels burning sensation\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I feel like I am going through a flare up, because I am under a form of stress.\n"},{"text":"I am stressed by school as usual.\n"},{"text":"I want to get rid of the stress, I hate that last minute shit\n"},{"text":"If I spend my time, ridding myself of the project, then I can chill. My scalp can chill\n"},{"text":"and my flare can calm down\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"23.39\n"},{"text":"minor itch at night, calm all over.\n"},{"text":"do it again tomorrow\n"},{"text":"bad mood at 4pm,didn\u0027t want Philip to see my face,\n"},{"text":"cutty, I apologize"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":413},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2023-07-04T21:29:12Z
- modifiedDate 2023-10-28T06:26:54Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid 98DB79E43F6F4478904406E70A905DD4
- starred false
- pinned false
- text Hi
- I'm back bitch
- So yesterday, the 3rd of july, my mom was on som shit.
- In general tho
- From Friday, didn't wanna speak to her
- Sat, everyone went to church, didn't see her,
- Sun, wedo, came back with big, ain't nobody gone pick up after you energy, as if I expect it
- On sun,Washed dishes, they weren't alone tbh, Alice's wash as soon as possible method worked
- Mon, kept quiet, to myself. She made n impassioned plea/speech/demand
- I got heated, I don't wanna be subdued
- She wore Braison down enough, he cut his hair into a nice afro.
- She told me they dropped everything (?? what), stopped everything ( again madam, what??) so I could finish school
- lower your hopes a bit
- And talked about my hair and she needs to see the report, ill send it to her.
- That's all backstory
- ***
- Today, she's nice as hell
- Made a complete turnaround, in tone, came to check up on me etc
- an I'm like , bitch what do you want
- fr like bffr
- Your mood changed, and your outlook towards me got friendlier, I'm supposed to do so tooo
- Hell to the no
- Idk why it changed, idk why you were mean one day and nice the next
- It's giving bpd
- And I don't wanna participate, thank you
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"Hi\n"},{"text":"I\u0027m back bitch\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"So yesterday, the 3rd of july, my mom was on som shit.\n"},{"text":"In general tho\n"},{"text":"From Friday, didn\u0027t wanna speak to her\n"},{"text":"Sat, everyone went to church, didn\u0027t see her,\n"},{"text":"Sun, wedo, came back with big, ain\u0027t nobody gone pick up after you energy, as if I expect it\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"On sun,Washed dishes, they weren\u0027t alone tbh, Alice\u0027s wash as soon as possible method worked\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"Mon, kept quiet, to myself. She made n impassioned plea/speech/demand\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I got heated, I don\u0027t wanna be subdued\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"She wore Braison down enough, he cut his hair into a nice afro.\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"She told me they dropped everything (?? what), stopped everything ( again madam, what??) so I could finish school\n"},{"text":"lower your hopes a bit\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"And talked about my hair and she needs to see the report, ill send it to her.\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"That\u0027s all backstory\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"embeddedObjects":[{"type":"horizontalRuleLine"}]},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"Today, she\u0027s nice as hell\n"},{"text":"Made a complete turnaround, in tone, came to check up on me etc\n"},{"text":"an I\u0027m like , bitch what do you want\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"fr like bffr\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"Your mood changed, and your outlook towards me got friendlier, I\u0027m supposed to do so tooo\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"Hell to the no\n"},{"text":"Idk why it changed, idk why you were mean one day and nice the next\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"It\u0027s giving bpd\n"},{"text":"And I don\u0027t wanna participate, thank you"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":397},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2023-07-04T12:34:12Z
- modifiedDate 2023-07-18T21:42:47Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid EDFF180550274303AE5FE54885DDB8C4
- starred false
- pinned false
- text I slept at 2
- Woken up at 8:30
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"I slept at 2\n"},{"text":"Woken up at 8:30\n"},{"text":"\n"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":397},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2023-06-28T09:13:32Z
- modifiedDate 2023-07-04T12:48:18Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid 9EFE5B61D3B5466DB0658ED5C5065AD2
- starred false
- pinned false
- text New day, feeling stabby
- Scary feelings
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"New day, feeling stabby\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"Scary feelings"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":397},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2023-06-26T21:33:44Z
- modifiedDate 2023-07-04T12:48:23Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid 616F9EE0ED0D449F98E6F4028CEBF79A
- starred false
- pinned false
- text ![](dayone-moment://3C3EA815A6B94E52BFAAC91046B58C35)
- It didn't work,
- From 10 to 13 to high school
- The pressure and disregard and lack of care you have shown me did not would me into who you want.
- It has not worked all my life, why would it work now.
- Also, I listened to a lady on Spotify, I know none of her credentials but she said " not wanting to do sth, lacking the motivation to do sth( that I need to do) will stay with me all my life and I have to sit with that"
- So I just have to bypass it, it's a possibility that I may not grow out of it, ever
- Fuck u mom
- Everytime i talk to this lady, or see her in her office , I remember when she and her husband were like, my work is so hard, everyone's work is so hard etc etc
- But I would just like to ba at the neurotypical baseline bruv
- When I think about that shit I got so mad
- 0 interactions with her, good
- Met with Benson, set it up, I felt stupid
- Afterwards, I felt hopeless
- What hope have I , of ever being sane, learned
- richText {"contents":[{"embeddedObjects":[{"identifier":"3C3EA815A6B94E52BFAAC91046B58C35","type":"photo"}]},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"It didn\u0027t work,\n"},{"text":"From 10 to 13 to high school\n"},{"text":"The pressure and disregard and lack of care you have shown me did not would me into who you want.\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"It has not worked all my life, why would it work now.\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"Also, I listened to a lady on Spotify, I know none of her credentials but she said \" not wanting to do sth, lacking the motivation to do sth( that I need to do) will stay with me all my life and I have to sit with that\"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"So I just have to bypass it, it\u0027s a possibility that I may not grow out of it, ever\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"Fuck u mom\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"Everytime i talk to this lady, or see her in her office , I remember when she and her husband were like, my work is so hard, everyone\u0027s work is so hard etc etc\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"But I would just like to ba at the neurotypical baseline bruv\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"When I think about that shit I got so mad\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"0 interactions with her, good\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"Met with Benson, set it up, I felt stupid\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"Afterwards, I felt hopeless\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"What hope have I , of ever being sane, learned"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":397},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2023-06-26T10:28:13Z
- modifiedDate 2023-07-04T12:48:26Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- photos
- identifier 3C3EA815A6B94E52BFAAC91046B58C35
- md5 9f7a5d5c6d9bff724ce070b7fe8415dc
- type jpg
- fileSize 0
- orderInEntry 0
- height 0
- width 0
- favorite false
- duration 0
- exposureBiasValue 0
- md5Thumbnail 9f7a5d5c6d9bff724ce070b7fe8415dc
- v
- uuid B3161DB8C46F4EF7874DDFB034FB1B2F
- starred false
- pinned false
- text I'm in a good mood.
- I woke up grudgingly, but I had a shower and it lfted my spirits.
- Brekkie
- ![](dayone-moment://A094D15D403F41A89C30153A731699B0)
- So I was going to take a shit when lo and behold. This motterfucker calls me up. I respond and like the *unhinged* bitch she is, says nun
- Must be some shite, kisii mum you speak when spoken to shit
- After I heard her lambast her relative and their family just this morning and the whole weekend.
- Would Jesus want you to do this for all the calling him out you want to, would he be talking shit about her
- I'm not a Christian though so I wouldn't know
- Anyway, she asks about proj , I tell her I'm on tests
- She asks if I'm done I say yeah
- She asks about the report
- And I lie to her about my work because after all that weeping and kneeing
- She wants to turn around and act like a hardass
- She scared me, not to much but enough.
- I already don't like you but I think it's pathetic that you're pulling this stick again and I'm sad
- I'm disappointed but I am not surprised
- I just had the shitty luck of being an accidental pregnancy to a fuckin sociopath and a thoroughly inequpped mother
- And you haven't gotten better Lillian
- 1999? To 2023 and you're not good.
- So anyway, she did scare me but ima remember to be honest, and try to stop masking.
- And playing hardball ain't gone work bruv.
- You been hard to me all my life and look what happened, your strategy don't work, ima keep movin though
- Even with no idea how
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"I\u0027m in a good mood.\n"},{"text":"I woke up grudgingly, but I had a shower and it lfted my spirits.\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"Brekkie\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"embeddedObjects":[{"identifier":"A094D15D403F41A89C30153A731699B0","type":"photo"}]},{"text":"So I was going to take a shit when lo and behold. This motterfucker calls me up. I respond and like the "},{"attributes":{"italic":true},"text":"unhinged "},{"text":" bitch she is, says nun\n\n"},{"text":"Must be some shite, kisii mum you speak when spoken to shit\n\n"},{"text":"After I heard her lambast her relative and their family just this morning and the whole weekend.\n\n"},{"text":"Would Jesus want you to do this for all the calling him out you want to, would he be talking shit about her\n\n"},{"text":"I\u0027m not a Christian though so I wouldn\u0027t know\n\n"},{"text":"Anyway, she asks about proj , I tell her I\u0027m on tests\n"},{"text":"She asks if I\u0027m done I say yeah\n"},{"text":"She asks about the report\n\n"},{"text":"And I lie to her about my work because after all that weeping and kneeing\n\n"},{"text":"She wants to turn around and act like a hardass\n\n"},{"text":"She scared me, not to much but enough.\n\n"},{"text":"I already don\u0027t like you but I think it\u0027s pathetic that you\u0027re pulling this stick again and I\u0027m sad\n\n"},{"text":"I\u0027m disappointed but I am not surprised\n\n"},{"text":"I just had the shitty luck of being an accidental pregnancy to a fuckin sociopath and a thoroughly inequpped mother\n\n"},{"text":"And you haven\u0027t gotten better Lillian\n\n"},{"text":"1999? To 2023 and you\u0027re not good. \n\n\n"},{"text":"So anyway, she did scare me but ima remember to be honest, and try to stop masking. \n\n"},{"text":"And playing hardball ain\u0027t gone work bruv. \n"},{"text":"You been hard to me all my life and look what happened, your strategy don\u0027t work, ima keep movin though \n"},{"text":"Even with no idea how \n\n\n"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":397},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2023-06-26T06:19:52Z
- modifiedDate 2023-06-26T10:28:07Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- photos
- identifier A094D15D403F41A89C30153A731699B0
- md5 0d36a08b74e153688160ce93afb3bdb8
- type jpg
- fileSize 0
- orderInEntry 0
- height 0
- width 0
- favorite false
- duration 0
- exposureBiasValue 0
- md5Thumbnail 0d36a08b74e153688160ce93afb3bdb8
- v
- uuid 53E9468217544E56BC94E8BB232EE1A4
- starred false
- pinned false
- text Woóee
- What a doozy this morning was.
- Last night my parents had a discussion with me. A discussion not an argument. I didn't say shit because this wasnt one of those give your input ones. So I listened, I didn't like what I heard
- I felt as though they tried to be overly simplistic and adopted a moral view of my failings.
- This morning, it was
- If only I tried hard enough, put more effort in, stopped postponing and forced myself to attend things then I would be better
- I woke up, wasnt feeling the meeting or the people or the singing etcetera
- Lillian banging on my door severally
- I finally come out, she's pulling me , forcing me, tugging on my hand and she's putting her weight behind it
- She's crying, saying I'm embarrassing her. Going on the floor, I'm crying too, I cry alon these days
- She leaves. I tell her to tell dad. I'm in a fighting been. Since I got to the study. Have a pen in my hand. A nail file nearby.
- I'm fantasizing about stabbing her.
- I'm expecting my father to come up, I'm in a fighting mood. I put the pen away. He's huge, and I have no desire to fight him
- She doesn't tell him
- I wait in vain. It ends, he comes up.
- Jokey, lightweight mood. I tell him I wanna see a psychiatrist/psychologist.
- He's like what's the issue, I semi- reiterate
- As if I could say it.
- I don't look him in the eye He says he'd consider it.
- He goes, I think it might be ok.
- He returns to fix a door ???
- He comes to me, launches into the long diatribe
- Everyone has problem. Jobs are hard . He's never said for me to be as good as the parent. Anyone can be anything
- Life is difficult.
- I'm not stopping the project. Yes, he want to see effort, no postponing. Sth about the meeting, wg an actual f
- Missing the pt, says he'll discuss with my mother
- leaves
- If you had a good dad, you have a bad mom
- This morning, I've sobbed, I've squatted, I've hated all before 10
- Edit on 26th
- I spent the rest of the day, okayish, because my parents were not around and I felt at ease
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"Woóee\n"},{"text":"What a doozy this morning was.\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"Last night my parents had a discussion with me. A discussion not an argument. I didn\u0027t say shit because this wasnt one of those give your input ones. So I listened, I didn\u0027t like what I heard\n"},{"text":"I felt as though they tried to be overly simplistic and adopted a moral view of my failings.\n"},{"text":"This morning, it was\n"},{"text":"If only I tried hard enough, put more effort in, stopped postponing and forced myself to attend things then I would be better\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I woke up, wasnt feeling the meeting or the people or the singing etcetera\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"Lillian banging on my door severally\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I finally come out, she\u0027s pulling me , forcing me, tugging on my hand and she\u0027s putting her weight behind it\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"She\u0027s crying, saying I\u0027m embarrassing her. Going on the floor, I\u0027m crying too, I cry alon these days\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"She leaves. I tell her to tell dad. I\u0027m in a fighting been. Since I got to the study. Have a pen in my hand. A nail file nearby.\n"},{"text":"I\u0027m fantasizing about stabbing her.\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I\u0027m expecting my father to come up, I\u0027m in a fighting mood. I put the pen away. He\u0027s huge, and I have no desire to fight him\n"},{"text":"She doesn\u0027t tell him\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I wait in vain. It ends, he comes up.\n"},{"text":"Jokey, lightweight mood. I tell him I wanna see a psychiatrist/psychologist.\n"},{"text":"He\u0027s like what\u0027s the issue, I semi- reiterate\n"},{"text":"As if I could say it.\n"},{"text":"I don\u0027t look him in the eye He says he\u0027d consider it.\n"},{"text":"He goes, I think it might be ok.\n"},{"text":"He returns to fix a door ???\n"},{"text":"He comes to me, launches into the long diatribe\n"},{"text":"Everyone has problem. Jobs are hard . He\u0027s never said for me to be as good as the parent. Anyone can be anything\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"Life is difficult.\n"},{"text":"I\u0027m not stopping the project. Yes, he want to see effort, no postponing. Sth about the meeting, wg an actual f\n"},{"text":"Missing the pt, says he\u0027ll discuss with my mother\n"},{"text":"leaves\n"},{"text":"If you had a good dad, you have a bad mom\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"This morning, I\u0027ve sobbed, I\u0027ve squatted, I\u0027ve hated all before 10\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"Edit on 26th\n"},{"text":"I spent the rest of the day, okayish, because my parents were not around and I felt at ease"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":397},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2023-06-25T08:50:54Z
- modifiedDate 2023-07-18T21:42:42Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid B955C882E08143DB8820F76FACDFDE2E
- starred false
- pinned false
- text Title: the Incredibly shite Adventures of Nigella
- I don't know if my rage last night was warranted
- ***
- Actually the rage continues
- I was mad at everything today
- Morning woken up by mom
- Asked about meet, said yes, there's a possibility
- It was confirmed yesterday thereby also confirming that I'm a fucking liar
- Anyway, awake I texted Odongo, you down for the afternoon, he was, set up a 30 minute timeframe up
- I'm scared I'm lying to Philip
- I laid in bed, till I was waken up by mom leaving, didn't really say bye, Alice came in with maize
- Talked to Phil for a while
- He introduced OpenCore to me and gave me, I accepted that role.
- Marketing, identify ppl who need/want the product and get it to em
- I don't know how ???
- I accepted, it felt like sth I should do, as his girlfriend (no air quotes)
- He also said to me my mom wouldn't let me go, if and when I finish school😳
- That was his feeling , and it pissed me the fuck
- I wanted to say, you're pissing me the fuck off, have you ever thought, has a think ever scrolled through your fucking brain because they're supporting me
- They provide for all my shit, where am I going to get lotion, water
- Fuck if she wants me to leave, do I want to leave, where am I gonna get my fuckin anything
- Pissed me off, that statement
- He also tried to encourage me by saying that loads of people are on my side and want me to succeed essentially, I will finish school
- Does anyone want to explore the bad options, anyone...??
- Finally got up after scrolling through all the sites, washed my hair, cooch, booch
- Dressed, sat down
- It was fuckin noon
- Went down for brekkie and to buy cake, gues who'd left the door, fuckin open and gone with the keY
- Rage numero dos
- Who the fuck does that
- I don't know how to explain it, I got really fuckin mad, I hit, I don't wanna say slammed
- I bashed the edge of my phone on three separate surfaces, door edge, stone wall edge, stone wall edge again. But gentler
- Got a bad feeling, went to the window , opened my case up
- Broken volume buttons
- Felt kinda ashamed, like my perfect record had been broken
- Shitty
- Biggest rage all day
- Had the meeting, he was very helpful , took me step by step throughout the whole thing
- A colon there, no space there
- Finito
- Look for Phil, nowhere to be found
- Got mini-mad, no texts. Not on call, I thought he was mad at me
- He was asleep
- Locked the gate, bought cake and crisps, I need money to fuel my addiction
- Alice came, opened , the gate, a slight stirring but really, nothing like before
- Called Phil, what's up, how you been, what's cooking, how has your day looked like
- Good convo, I'm listening, he's speaking
- I explain myself really shittily as always, hiding and holding back information, idk why, if I don't speak, ill forget or never bring it up . Like...
- Almost done, he tells me his work saga. It's going good
- At the tail, end I ask, how you wan mi fi support ya
- He's like if you were here😏😏
- I'm like nope, realistically
- He doubles down, triples down
- I'm like wtf
- Same thing with his MSA trip
- I cant go witchu, I can't lie and say there's a school trip, gimme something feasible goddamit
- JC
- I feel bad from that interaction because, he said he had shit to do, a buttload of stuff actually and you just want me around
- I ain't got shit to do?!!
- weird fuckin angle to hate on, said bye, not too abrupt and that was my day
- My moods been Hella ' stab his neck, bite a chunk of his arm off '
- Confirmed Confirmed never show my parents my fuckin hair
- So
- And jfc , not fuckin help them
- Is it a Christian thing to compare lifestyles, and since you don't have it worse than the other guy. Fuckin rejoice
- These folks make me so mad, I'm heated heated
- We get it, in neurotic. The fuck
- You're literally gonna sit there and say, nooo don't be sad, don't victimise yourself
- I'm sad coz I have my own problems, my own issues and they bother me. They make me sad
- I acnt wake up each morning with a smile of positivity on my face because my studies are the littlest ish ever
- It bothers me
- And you don't get it
- Again with the mentioning of the selfishness , beating a dead horse
- Also never come downstairs for supper again
- Ever\*\*
- Eeeveerr
- The encouragement was so shite because you touched on some issues I have but no way to fuckin solve em
- The aloneness - I want a community too
- The nontalking, the studies the hope , the fuckin positivity
- But none of the solutions, God is not coming down to scramble my brain better
- Also the home is good, the living with your parents thing is good
- But it does wonders for my mental health, it kills it
- I'm so mad, I can feel it pumping through my veins
- I lack the words to articulate it, the feeling of being trapped in a vice made of words
- But my imagination keeps me company
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"Title: the Incredibly shite Adventures of Nigella\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I don\u0027t know if my rage last night was warranted\n"},{"embeddedObjects":[{"type":"horizontalRuleLine"}]},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"Actually the rage continues\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I was mad at everything today\n"},{"text":"Morning woken up by mom\n"},{"text":"Asked about meet, said yes, there\u0027s a possibility\n"},{"text":"It was confirmed yesterday thereby also confirming that I\u0027m a fucking liar\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"Anyway, awake I texted Odongo, you down for the afternoon, he was, set up a 30 minute timeframe up\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I\u0027m scared I\u0027m lying to Philip\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I laid in bed, till I was waken up by mom leaving, didn\u0027t really say bye, Alice came in with maize\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"Talked to Phil for a while\n"},{"text":"He introduced OpenCore to me and gave me, I accepted that role.\n"},{"text":"Marketing, identify ppl who need/want the product and get it to em\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I don\u0027t know how ???\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I accepted, it felt like sth I should do, as his girlfriend (no air quotes)\n"},{"text":"He also said to me my mom wouldn\u0027t let me go, if and when I finish school😳\n"},{"text":"That was his feeling , and it pissed me the fuck\n"},{"text":"I wanted to say, you\u0027re pissing me the fuck off, have you ever thought, has a think ever scrolled through your fucking brain because they\u0027re supporting me\n"},{"text":"They provide for all my shit, where am I going to get lotion, water\n"},{"text":"Fuck if she wants me to leave, do I want to leave, where am I gonna get my fuckin anything\n"},{"text":"Pissed me off, that statement\n"},{"text":"He also tried to encourage me by saying that loads of people are on my side and want me to succeed essentially, I will finish school\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"Does anyone want to explore the bad options, anyone...??\n"},{"text":"Finally got up after scrolling through all the sites, washed my hair, cooch, booch\n"},{"text":"Dressed, sat down\n"},{"text":"It was fuckin noon\n"},{"text":"Went down for brekkie and to buy cake, gues who\u0027d left the door, fuckin open and gone with the keY\n"},{"text":"Rage numero dos\n"},{"text":"Who the fuck does that\n"},{"text":"I don\u0027t know how to explain it, I got really fuckin mad, I hit, I don\u0027t wanna say slammed\n"},{"text":"I bashed the edge of my phone on three separate surfaces, door edge, stone wall edge, stone wall edge again. But gentler\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"Got a bad feeling, went to the window , opened my case up\n"},{"text":"Broken volume buttons\n"},{"text":"Felt kinda ashamed, like my perfect record had been broken\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"Shitty\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"Biggest rage all day\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"Had the meeting, he was very helpful , took me step by step throughout the whole thing\n"},{"text":"A colon there, no space there\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"Finito\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"Look for Phil, nowhere to be found\n"},{"text":"Got mini-mad, no texts. Not on call, I thought he was mad at me\n"},{"text":"He was asleep\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"Locked the gate, bought cake and crisps, I need money to fuel my addiction\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"Alice came, opened , the gate, a slight stirring but really, nothing like before\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"Called Phil, what\u0027s up, how you been, what\u0027s cooking, how has your day looked like\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"Good convo, I\u0027m listening, he\u0027s speaking\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I explain myself really shittily as always, hiding and holding back information, idk why, if I don\u0027t speak, ill forget or never bring it up . Like...\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"Almost done, he tells me his work saga. It\u0027s going good\n"},{"text":"At the tail, end I ask, how you wan mi fi support ya\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"He\u0027s like if you were here😏😏\n"},{"text":"I\u0027m like nope, realistically\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"He doubles down, triples down\n"},{"text":"I\u0027m like wtf\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"Same thing with his MSA trip\n"},{"text":"I cant go witchu, I can\u0027t lie and say there\u0027s a school trip, gimme something feasible goddamit\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"JC\n"},{"text":"I feel bad from that interaction because, he said he had shit to do, a buttload of stuff actually and you just want me around\n"},{"text":"I ain\u0027t got shit to do?!!\n"},{"text":"weird fuckin angle to hate on, said bye, not too abrupt and that was my day\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"My moods been Hella \u0027 stab his neck, bite a chunk of his arm off \u0027\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"Confirmed Confirmed never show my parents my fuckin hair\n"},{"text":"So\n"},{"text":"And jfc , not fuckin help them\n"},{"text":"Is it a Christian thing to compare lifestyles, and since you don\u0027t have it worse than the other guy. Fuckin rejoice\n"},{"text":"These folks make me so mad, I\u0027m heated heated\n"},{"text":"We get it, in neurotic. The fuck\n"},{"text":"You\u0027re literally gonna sit there and say, nooo don\u0027t be sad, don\u0027t victimise yourself\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I\u0027m sad coz I have my own problems, my own issues and they bother me. They make me sad\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I acnt wake up each morning with a smile of positivity on my face because my studies are the littlest ish ever\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"It bothers me\n"},{"text":"And you don\u0027t get it\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"Again with the mentioning of the selfishness , beating a dead horse\n"},{"text":"Also never come downstairs for supper again\n"},{"text":"Ever**\n"},{"text":"Eeeveerr\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"The encouragement was so shite because you touched on some issues I have but no way to fuckin solve em\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"The aloneness - I want a community too\n"},{"text":"The nontalking, the studies the hope , the fuckin positivity\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"But none of the solutions, God is not coming down to scramble my brain better\n"},{"text":"Also the home is good, the living with your parents thing is good\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"But it does wonders for my mental health, it kills it\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I\u0027m so mad, I can feel it pumping through my veins\n"},{"text":"I lack the words to articulate it, the feeling of being trapped in a vice made of words\n"},{"text":"But my imagination keeps me company"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":413},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2023-06-24T06:31:52Z
- modifiedDate 2023-10-28T06:25:23Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid 805E3CE5EF614F0CA1F750DF0E4867B6
- starred false
- pinned false
- text Title: the Incredibly shite Adventures of Nigella
- Author: Nigella Kemunto Orina
- Publication Date: 2023
- Genre: Personal Memoir
- Publisher: DayOne
- Language: English
- Pages: daily
- Format: Text document
- Summary: I am chronicling my shitty life, and the problems I think I face and how they affect me. And all the big feelings I have and how I react to the small shit and the big shit
- the extraordinary journey of Nigella ( furk Kemunto) From Zimmerman to Ruai , as I navigate through life's ups and downs, giving up periodically, hating and loving myself and all the In-between.
- My official fucking journal
- So I'm feeling very attacked by the truth.
- My mother and father cornered me , no the fuck they did not
- But they were like what were you up to
- And I realised earlier today, Im masking as hell in front of my dad.
- I don't want him to know something's wrong with me.
- My mom too but on 12/13 , I had a breakdown and I haven't been open since
- Soon after I found out th@, in my opinion, they be talking shit about me.
- Etc, etc
- With my aunt, random ho's who ain't never met me, my dad
- Just like, she ain't gone do it,
- She's lazy
- She's procrastinating
- She demotivated
- She's all this and that
- And it's all true, I be tweakin
- I been struggling the entire time
- I tried to advocate for my shit once , this woman hit up my lecs like she wanna give up school
- I been wanting to do that for a while, I ain't got no other skills tho
- All this talking, all this yappin to fuckin randos and still no help
- Coz I been askin this bitch what's up
- And it's been fuckin silent but all of a sudden she wanna talk me up , how I'm having a struggle
- I feel like I been struggling since the dawn of time but you still ain't offered no concrete help
- And ima need to stand up to this weak ass bitch too
- Fuckin neurotypical, talkin all this you know what
- You can do it so well, I get it
- But I can't, and it's been documented for a while that I cant. And I need help and all you can say is ooh maybe she cant do it
- Because ofboth of You numbnuts, I wanna die and I been wearing the cloak of low self esteem and disbelief in myself
- And I can see how you perpetuate it
- Fuck all of you , fr
- Side note, I bet there are some people on my side but they be wanting to fix me in they own way and that shit clearly don't count.
- Petition to never show mum my hair✔️✔️
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"Title: the Incredibly shite Adventures of Nigella\n"},{"text":"Author: Nigella Kemunto Orina\n"},{"text":"Publication Date: 2023\n"},{"text":"Genre: Personal Memoir\n"},{"text":"Publisher: DayOne\n"},{"text":"Language: English\n"},{"text":"Pages: daily\n"},{"text":"Format: Text document\n"},{"text":"Summary: I am chronicling my shitty life, and the problems I think I face and how they affect me. And all the big feelings I have and how I react to the small shit and the big shit\n"},{"text":"the extraordinary journey of Nigella ( furk Kemunto) From Zimmerman to Ruai , as I navigate through life\u0027s ups and downs, giving up periodically, hating and loving myself and all the In-between.\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"My official fucking journal\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"So I\u0027m feeling very attacked by the truth.\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"My mother and father cornered me , no the fuck they did not\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"But they were like what were you up to\n"},{"text":"And I realised earlier today, Im masking as hell in front of my dad.\n"},{"text":"I don\u0027t want him to know something\u0027s wrong with me.\n"},{"text":"My mom too but on 12/13 , I had a breakdown and I haven\u0027t been open since\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"Soon after I found out th@, in my opinion, they be talking shit about me.\n"},{"text":"Etc, etc\n"},{"text":"With my aunt, random ho\u0027s who ain\u0027t never met me, my dad\n"},{"text":"Just like, she ain\u0027t gone do it,\n"},{"text":"She\u0027s lazy\n"},{"text":"She\u0027s procrastinating\n"},{"text":"She demotivated\n"},{"text":"She\u0027s all this and that\n"},{"text":"And it\u0027s all true, I be tweakin\n"},{"text":"I been struggling the entire time\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I tried to advocate for my shit once , this woman hit up my lecs like she wanna give up school\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I been wanting to do that for a while, I ain\u0027t got no other skills tho\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"All this talking, all this yappin to fuckin randos and still no help\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"Coz I been askin this bitch what\u0027s up\n"},{"text":"And it\u0027s been fuckin silent but all of a sudden she wanna talk me up , how I\u0027m having a struggle\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I feel like I been struggling since the dawn of time but you still ain\u0027t offered no concrete help\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"And ima need to stand up to this weak ass bitch too\n"},{"text":"Fuckin neurotypical, talkin all this you know what\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"You can do it so well, I get it\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"But I can\u0027t, and it\u0027s been documented for a while that I cant. And I need help and all you can say is ooh maybe she cant do it\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"Because ofboth of You numbnuts, I wanna die and I been wearing the cloak of low self esteem and disbelief in myself\n"},{"text":"And I can see how you perpetuate it\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"Fuck all of you , fr\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"Side note, I bet there are some people on my side but they be wanting to fix me in they own way and that shit clearly don\u0027t count.\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"Petition to never show mum my hair✔️✔️"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":406},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2023-06-23T16:19:43Z
- modifiedDate 2023-08-06T10:37:22Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid 1A7F880F9A7C44069502CE8297414337
- starred false
- pinned false
- text '
- ,
- .
- kys
- I am harbouring a lot of rage in my heart.
- Pure, mad Ness
- I'm so angry and vengeful
- I can hardly
- And I am taking out my anger on myself
- Because 50 yr old biddies don't vibe with psychiatrists, I must not either
- I am furious
- Not only do I feel betrayed, I feel bad, plain bad
- Why did I pretend to care about things when I could have just not.
- I want to scream.
- And I feel like Lillian would do everything for everyone but me.
- I was hopeful, I genuinely thought she was looking into it. But she wasn't, she talked it over.
- They decided not to.
- Her and my dad, fucker that he is
- Just said hey, she is just procrastinating
- She's just lazy
- some moral infirmity
- And in that moment I wanted to give up.
- So I have/will lay it to rest
- I'm soo jealous but I need to focus on getting my 200,000 together
- Meds and sessions, once a week for one year
- I am back to feeling like I cannot rely on anyone
- Fuck family, I don't wanna love
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"kys\n\n"},{"text":"I am harbouring a lot of rage in my heart.\n"},{"text":"Pure, mad Ness\n"},{"text":"I\u0027m so angry and vengeful\n"},{"text":"I can hardly\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"And I am taking out my anger on myself\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"Because 50 yr old biddies don\u0027t vibe with psychiatrists, I must not either\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I am furious\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"Not only do I feel betrayed, I feel bad, plain bad\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"Why did I pretend to care about things when I could have just not.\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I want to scream.\n"},{"text":"And I feel like Lillian would do everything for everyone but me.\n"},{"text":"I was hopeful, I genuinely thought she was looking into it. But she wasn\u0027t, she talked it over.\n"},{"text":"They decided not to.\n"},{"text":"Her and my dad, fucker that he is\n"},{"text":"Just said hey, she is just procrastinating\n"},{"text":"She\u0027s just lazy\n"},{"text":"some moral infirmity\n"},{"text":"And in that moment I wanted to give up.\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"So I have/will lay it to rest\n"},{"text":"I\u0027m soo jealous but I need to focus on getting my 200,000 together\n"},{"text":"Meds and sessions, once a week for one year\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I am back to feeling like I cannot rely on anyone\n"},{"text":"Fuck family, I don\u0027t wanna love\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":404},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2023-06-11T07:58:52Z
- modifiedDate 2023-07-23T07:59:19Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid 968D423193CE40CDB02BFE8BFE43C0DD
- starred false
- pinned false
- text '
- ,
- .
- lilo
- Not focusing on it is not helping
- Affirmations are not helping
- God is not helping
- I feel like your doing more for Braison than you want to do for me
- I'm askinngfor help because I know if I don't change, the same issues I had before will still be there
- How am I approaching it differently and acting differently
- And your minimizing is not helping
- It's not the biggest problem, it's not a severe case but it feels like one to me.
- And I feel as though my life is not moving forward because of it,
- I have tried changing my actions but I have not been able to sustain the change, and I feel like I am in the same position.
- I am asking for your help so I can consult a professional
- And I feel like you are not taking it seriously
- If it were Braison, would you be trying like you're treating me
- When I went to talk to a therapist last year, you again, laughed and minimised my feelings
- And so I dropped the issue
- But I still have not gotten any help and I still feel overwhelmed.
- And I wou
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"lilo\n\n"},{"text":"Not focusing on it is not helping\n"},{"text":"Affirmations are not helping\n"},{"text":"God is not helping\n"},{"text":"I feel like your doing more for Braison than you want to do for me\n"},{"text":"I\u0027m askinngfor help because I know if I don\u0027t change, the same issues I had before will still be there\n"},{"text":"How am I approaching it differently and acting differently\n\n\n\n\n\n"},{"text":"And your minimizing is not helping\n"},{"text":"It\u0027s not the biggest problem, it\u0027s not a severe case but it feels like one to me.\n"},{"text":"And I feel as though my life is not moving forward because of it,\n"},{"text":"I have tried changing my actions but I have not been able to sustain the change, and I feel like I am in the same position. \n\n"},{"text":"I am asking for your help so I can consult a professional\n"},{"text":"And I feel like you are not taking it seriously\n"},{"text":"If it were Braison, would you be trying like you\u0027re treating me\n"},{"text":"When I went to talk to a therapist last year, you again, laughed and minimised my feelings \n"},{"text":"And so I dropped the issue \n"},{"text":"But I still have not gotten any help and I still feel overwhelmed.\n\n\n"},{"text":"And I wou"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":404},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2023-06-07T07:57:30Z
- modifiedDate 2023-07-23T07:58:49Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid 24C6AD60F80740E6A90D62B635299838
- starred false
- pinned false
- text I am completely unhappy, not at all filled with joy
- unhappy with my life, I'm so sad
- I can't live like this. I don't want to be this way
- I'm dissatisfied in my life
- I am afraid, I feel afraid. I don't want to talk, no one can help me
- I feel alone
- No mount of internet commiserating can make me feel better
- I burst into teors after a talk and I didn't even get to talk about my day
- My mind is constantly filled with bad thoughts
- I feel alone, how can someone else understand what I'm going through when I can't even understand it
- And coincidentally every other fucking person my age seems happy and as if they like theirlives, what their doing
- I'm day dreaming all the time
- Freedom is not given, it's fought for
- Ill fight. I have to
- But this is not it.
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I am completely unhappy, not at all filled with joy\n"},{"text":"unhappy with my life, I\u0027m so sad\n"},{"text":"I can\u0027t live like this. I don\u0027t want to be this way\n"},{"text":"I\u0027m dissatisfied in my life\n"},{"text":"I am afraid, I feel afraid. I don\u0027t want to talk, no one can help me \n"},{"text":"I feel alone\n"},{"text":"No mount of internet commiserating can make me feel better\n"},{"text":"I burst into teors after a talk and I didn\u0027t even get to talk about my day\n"},{"text":"My mind is constantly filled with bad thoughts\n"},{"text":"I feel alone, how can someone else understand what I\u0027m going through when I can\u0027t even understand it\n"},{"text":"And coincidentally every other fucking person my age seems happy and as if they like theirlives, what their doing\n"},{"text":"I\u0027m day dreaming all the time\n"},{"text":"Freedom is not given, it\u0027s fought for\n"},{"text":"Ill fight. I have to\n"},{"text":"But this is not it."}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":404},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2023-03-23T07:56:52Z
- modifiedDate 2023-07-23T07:57:00Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid A9C576FCAAE14A0383144C07A49C196D
- starred false
- pinned false
- text '
- ,
- .
- I miss the boy really
- But I want to practice love , patience and understanding
- When he left of course I was like I completely understand
- But it's been a day and already I feel a rift, like our conversations, at least from my side are stifled
- None of us has done something wrong
- I took a nap early on Sunday coz I was Hella bored and slept till 11 with my phone off, so we didn't get to talk
- But it's still all love tho
- We will still come back from this
- Haya ni ya muda mfupi , I hope
- When I don't feel close to him, is when I start to overthink and jump to conclusions and make assumptions
- I know it's not the case but goddamn, I'm (£\&'+90?;£@15¥¢®\~\|\~\`\~}✓✓
- I miss you Phil with all my heart and god knows if there's anything I can do to close this gap btn us' I will do it.
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"I miss the boy really\n"},{"text":"But I want to practice love , patience and understanding\n"},{"text":"When he left of course I was like I completely understand\n"},{"text":"But it\u0027s been a day and already I feel a rift, like our conversations, at least from my side are stifled\n"},{"text":"None of us has done something wrong\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I took a nap early on Sunday coz I was Hella bored and slept till 11 with my phone off, so we didn\u0027t get to talk\n"},{"text":"But it\u0027s still all love tho\n"},{"text":"We will still come back from this\n"},{"text":"Haya ni ya muda mfupi , I hope\n"},{"text":"When I don\u0027t feel close to him, is when I start to overthink and jump to conclusions and make assumptions\n"},{"text":"I know it\u0027s not the case but goddamn, I\u0027m (£\u0026\u0027+90?;£@15¥¢®~|~`~}✓✓\n"},{"text":"I miss you Phil with all my heart and god knows if there\u0027s anything I can do to close this gap btn us\u0027 I will do it."}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":413},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2023-03-14T07:56:05Z
- modifiedDate 2023-10-28T06:25:07Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid 86381265BEA548848AE96D311926F287
- starred false
- pinned false
- text Chi
- Sarit
- Town
- Got home
- Need to be a Christian god fearing woman
- No respect for my parents common courtesy
- Arriving after them
- Do I own the house
- Stubborn, Hard headed - doesn't listen
- My rebuttal made her shake her head and lose her train of thought
- Not supposed to answer
- Don't imagine that you are like other people who can speak and defend themselves
- Not much
- Cant follow sb around for their whole life , you have your own life to lose
- I also feel like when mum refers to dad as sb who is fragile and might get high blood pressure because of me
- He doesn't really care like that
- I might have really been affected by that a while ago but now not so much
- He is not directing that much energy towards me
- Priorities, why not waking up early for church
- Need to make uji and tea in the morning
- Tidy up
- All I remember
- I'm 22 A grown woman
- But soon ppl will wash their hands of me
- Apparently, this is all hearsay tho
- A number of people have said I'm stubborn and I don't listen( edit\*\* 6 mar 23 cackling because I don't see or hear anyone listening to me)
- I genuinely don't remember
- My dad said I need to learn to accommodate people
- Just because I had the thought that I want to go so I won't listen to anyone
- I wish anyone thought of being accommodating and considerate of my requests
- I think they are few and far between
- But nooo
- I can afford to go walking in town, when I could be home washing dishes
- It's not that deep
- Also being silent and headstrong is not helping me
- And after, dad prayed that his words could be softened, (they weren't that harsh) and that we would be obedient and learn to listen
- Honestly praying in this house embarrasses me
- We are also going to someone house/ church for a death because we need to be together
- Also , no place nearby ever. If dad leaves without me then that's it. I need to find transport.
- When he comes downstairs and I'm late
- He should leave
- The world is hard and work is coming
- And in all my life I've never been early
- Fucking true tho
- And mum really keeps harping about not getting me a job, not asking someone who she knows to take me,I havent asked her to, also don't want her to
- I need to figure out my job prospects and where to look
- \*\* Embarazzing really
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"Chi\n"},{"text":"Sarit\n"},{"text":"Town\n\n\n"},{"text":"Got home\n"},{"text":"Need to be a Christian god fearing woman\n"},{"text":"No respect for my parents common courtesy\n"},{"text":"Arriving after them\n"},{"text":"Do I own the house\n"},{"text":"Stubborn, Hard headed - doesn\u0027t listen \n\n"},{"text":"My rebuttal made her shake her head and lose her train of thought\n"},{"text":"Not supposed to answer\n"},{"text":"Don\u0027t imagine that you are like other people who can speak and defend themselves \n\n"},{"text":"Not much\n"},{"text":"Cant follow sb around for their whole life , you have your own life to lose\n"},{"text":"I also feel like when mum refers to dad as sb who is fragile and might get high blood pressure because of me\n"},{"text":"He doesn\u0027t really care like that\n"},{"text":"I might have really been affected by that a while ago but now not so much\n"},{"text":"He is not directing that much energy towards me \n\n"},{"text":"Priorities, why not waking up early for church \n\n"},{"text":"Need to make uji and tea in the morning\n"},{"text":"Tidy up \n\n"},{"text":"All I remember\n"},{"text":"I\u0027m 22 A grown woman\n"},{"text":"But soon ppl will wash their hands of me \n\n"},{"text":"Apparently, this is all hearsay tho\n"},{"text":"A number of people have said I\u0027m stubborn and I don\u0027t listen( edit** 6 mar 23 cackling because I don\u0027t see or hear anyone listening to me)\n"},{"text":"I genuinely don\u0027t remember \n\n"},{"text":"My dad said I need to learn to accommodate people\n"},{"text":"Just because I had the thought that I want to go so I won\u0027t listen to anyone \n\n"},{"text":"I wish anyone thought of being accommodating and considerate of my requests \n\n"},{"text":"I think they are few and far between \n\n"},{"text":"But nooo\n"},{"text":"I can afford to go walking in town, when I could be home washing dishes \n\n"},{"text":"It\u0027s not that deep \n\n"},{"text":"Also being silent and headstrong is not helping me \n\n"},{"text":"And after, dad prayed that his words could be softened, (they weren\u0027t that harsh) and that we would be obedient and learn to listen \n\n"},{"text":"Honestly praying in this house embarrasses me \n\n"},{"text":"We are also going to someone house/ church for a death because we need to be together \n\n"},{"text":"Also , no place nearby ever. If dad leaves without me then that\u0027s it. I need to find transport.\n"},{"text":"When he comes downstairs and I\u0027m late\n"},{"text":"He should leave \n\n"},{"text":"The world is hard and work is coming\n"},{"text":"And in all my life I\u0027ve never been early \n\n"},{"text":"Fucking true tho \n\n"},{"text":"And mum really keeps harping about not getting me a job, not asking someone who she knows to take me,I havent asked her to, also don\u0027t want her to \n\n"},{"text":"I need to figure out my job prospects and where to look \n\n"},{"text":"** Embarazzing really \n\n\n\n"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":404},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2023-03-06T07:55:05Z
- modifiedDate 2023-07-23T07:55:35Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid 6130DB4FCFAE437B8D16A2CFB8267620
- starred false
- pinned false
- text The 12 th of September 2022
- I feel kinda gross today
- I'm such a coward and I hate it, I feel like a
- Lame-o
- A loser for staying behind
- To see Phil and I recognize that it's lust( I want him to lay on top of me with his entire bodyweight)
- And low self esteem that's amazing me stay here and feel like this
- I hope his presence will make me feel better tho
- I swear I have a prob but I feel like it's not as bad since he's here irl, he's a physical being that I'm conversing with
- He's not fake and even when he's in my head
- I still get to see him irl and dispel (somewhat) the fantasies
- By just talking to him irl
- Thank god for the holiday even if it's for a bitter ass president
- Grey clouds blue skies
- Fat drops of rain got me worried about walking in Nairobi
- Suit pants unravelling
- Need to be ironed
- Hope
- Need to wash my handkerchiefs
- Self started locs or loctitian
- No pay or pay, what if I don't like the look of the really fat ones
- Il
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"The 12 th of September 2022\n"},{"text":"I feel kinda gross today\n"},{"text":"I\u0027m such a coward and I hate it, I feel like a\n"},{"text":"Lame-o\n"},{"text":"A loser for staying behind\n"},{"text":"To see Phil and I recognize that it\u0027s lust( I want him to lay on top of me with his entire bodyweight)\n"},{"text":"And low self esteem that\u0027s amazing me stay here and feel like this\n"},{"text":"I hope his presence will make me feel better tho\n"},{"text":"I swear I have a prob but I feel like it\u0027s not as bad since he\u0027s here irl, he\u0027s a physical being that I\u0027m conversing with\n"},{"text":"He\u0027s not fake and even when he\u0027s in my head\n"},{"text":"I still get to see him irl and dispel (somewhat) the fantasies\n"},{"text":"By just talking to him irl\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"Thank god for the holiday even if it\u0027s for a bitter ass president\n"},{"text":"Grey clouds blue skies\n"},{"text":"Fat drops of rain got me worried about walking in Nairobi\n"},{"text":"Suit pants unravelling\n"},{"text":"Need to be ironed\n"},{"text":"Hope\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"Need to wash my handkerchiefs\n"},{"text":"Self started locs or loctitian\n"},{"text":"No pay or pay, what if I don\u0027t like the look of the really fat ones\n"},{"text":"Il\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":413},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2022-09-12T07:52:35Z
- modifiedDate 2023-10-28T06:24:56Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid E8DA3B619FEC442986ADDDC3F14D6A66
- starred false
- pinned false
- text wood; not good
- I'm frightened of going to work by myself and live with somebody else
- I was also fuckin scammed
- But it's all good, wtf can I do
- I've learnt my lesson look for an with customer referrals and shiy
- I feel bad , ugly, unsuccessful, and bad
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"\n"},{"text":"wood; not good\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"I\u0027m frightened of going to work by myself and live with somebody else\n"},{"text":"I was also fuckin scammed\n"},{"text":"But it\u0027s all good, wtf can I do\n"},{"text":"I\u0027ve learnt my lesson look for an with customer referrals and shiy\n"},{"text":"I feel bad , ugly, unsuccessful, and bad"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":454},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2021-07-20T13:28:25Z
- modifiedDate 2024-02-21T11:28:12Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid 698B2FDA2A8340EAB5C709A23BE0914D
- starred false
- pinned false
- text
- richText {"contents":[],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":406},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2019-10-31T10:55:00Z
- modifiedDate 2023-08-06T10:55:02Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid 00B20E1DC2094454A0F4256EAC4DF1B1
- starred false
- pinned false
- text
- richText {"contents":[],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":406},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2019-10-30T10:58:57Z
- modifiedDate 2023-08-06T10:58:59Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid 2DFC8A649A474936B4D7CF840F8F52A7
- starred false
- pinned false
- text
- richText {"contents":[],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":406},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2019-10-29T10:58:53Z
- modifiedDate 2023-08-06T10:58:55Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid 27B7404E4FE8429DB604AC8B2E7D0140
- starred false
- pinned false
- text
- richText {"contents":[],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":406},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2019-10-28T10:58:49Z
- modifiedDate 2023-08-06T10:58:51Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid 98869DF2F51841F894FCF88DBE6746CC
- starred false
- pinned false
- text
- creationDate 2019-10-27T10:55:32Z
- modifiedDate 2019-10-27T10:55:32Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid 794DA29FCBF741779F9381217FB91B77
- starred false
- pinned false
- text
- richText {"contents":[],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":406},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2019-10-26T10:55:25Z
- modifiedDate 2023-08-06T10:55:27Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid B447B4B68A3849EEA1DF4C1E7B519C9F
- starred false
- pinned false
- text
- creationDate 2019-10-25T10:55:35Z
- modifiedDate 2019-10-25T10:55:35Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid 26D3E82329DF4C21B8CD2FB552BA058A
- starred false
- pinned false
- text
- richText {"contents":[],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":406},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2019-10-24T10:55:05Z
- modifiedDate 2023-08-06T10:55:06Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid CC549CB2BE2241BFBD275C1679CF3AAF
- starred false
- pinned false
- text
- richText {"contents":[],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":406},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2019-10-23T10:58:35Z
- modifiedDate 2023-08-06T10:58:38Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid 5992F542395B42E9974D314B4698281F
- starred false
- pinned false
- text
- richText {"contents":[],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":406},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2019-10-22T10:58:39Z
- modifiedDate 2023-08-06T10:58:41Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid B6007A86E0A44BF09A4F2B5B4848C640
- starred false
- pinned false
- text
- richText {"contents":[],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":406},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2019-10-21T10:59:04Z
- modifiedDate 2023-08-06T10:59:07Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid 83825FCA2F5740868C8968B7AB5CA0ED
- starred false
- pinned false
- text
- richText {"contents":[],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":406},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2019-10-20T10:55:29Z
- modifiedDate 2023-08-06T10:55:30Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid 3A86518F372E439FAC39EB7F7D43F7ED
- starred false
- pinned false
- text
- creationDate 2019-10-19T10:55:43Z
- modifiedDate 2019-10-19T10:55:43Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid FB9091F1CA0F4F12887E332C2176AB18
- starred false
- pinned false
- text
- creationDate 2019-10-18T10:55:38Z
- modifiedDate 2019-10-18T10:55:38Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid 0204B5BB8EC34C6CBD31BD469E8B416C
- starred false
- pinned false
- text
- creationDate 2019-10-17T10:55:40Z
- modifiedDate 2019-10-17T10:55:40Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid D08176594F274103B0833CA0AF19E688
- starred false
- pinned false
- text
- richText {"contents":[],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":406},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2019-10-16T10:58:23Z
- modifiedDate 2023-08-06T10:58:25Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid B2A2E9A8F5EC4DDAA8FC4F9D19A1178D
- starred false
- pinned false
- text
- richText {"contents":[],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":406},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2019-10-15T10:58:18Z
- modifiedDate 2023-08-06T10:58:21Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid 7E766EB8F350491C9A7DE9D181954FBF
- starred false
- pinned false
- text
- richText {"contents":[],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":406},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2019-10-14T10:58:43Z
- modifiedDate 2023-08-06T10:58:46Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid D9C2F5144FFC42988DD5F59A3AB76B66
- starred false
- pinned false
- text
- creationDate 2019-10-13T10:55:56Z
- modifiedDate 2019-10-13T10:55:56Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid C50F524D97804779BBB5B33100695671
- starred false
- pinned false
- text
- richText {"contents":[],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":406},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2019-10-12T10:55:46Z
- modifiedDate 2023-08-06T10:55:48Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid 7A09D2ED9E274DA6B6993F004E6F23EA
- starred false
- pinned false
- text
- creationDate 2019-10-11T10:55:58Z
- modifiedDate 2019-10-11T10:55:58Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid 3177A6EE350B4BDD9F3EDDC915525F7E
- starred false
- pinned false
- text
- creationDate 2019-10-10T10:56:01Z
- modifiedDate 2019-10-10T10:56:01Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid 53A098F03CA8457290CEBC81EBC62BA5
- starred false
- pinned false
- text
- richText {"contents":[],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":406},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2019-10-09T10:58:14Z
- modifiedDate 2023-08-06T10:58:16Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid 4A5AE1F6F1294F999EEA05660F673508
- starred false
- pinned false
- text
- richText {"contents":[],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":406},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2019-10-08T10:58:27Z
- modifiedDate 2023-08-06T10:58:29Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid 779D5D3EC1004B9F81064060DAFCF0D5
- starred false
- pinned false
- text
- richText {"contents":[],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":406},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2019-10-07T10:58:31Z
- modifiedDate 2023-08-06T10:58:34Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid EBDA2ABE1A874F599F4A0C5AC18F8BE0
- starred false
- pinned false
- text
- richText {"contents":[],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":406},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2019-10-06T10:55:50Z
- modifiedDate 2023-08-06T10:55:51Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid C956C50DDB454D06806A093BB495B35F
- starred false
- pinned false
- text
- richText {"contents":[],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":406},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2019-10-05T10:55:53Z
- modifiedDate 2023-08-06T10:55:54Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid 5E9EFF2513BC482AA913EDAF5FCC9811
- starred false
- pinned false
- text
- richText {"contents":[],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":406},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2019-10-04T10:55:21Z
- modifiedDate 2023-08-06T10:55:23Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid C4C2AAC301C14C1F9BC34409C5AF3D00
- starred false
- pinned false
- text
- richText {"contents":[],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":406},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2019-10-03T10:56:04Z
- modifiedDate 2023-08-06T10:56:05Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid EA5D60C2365E46E7BFEF8983731788B0
- starred false
- pinned false
- text
- richText {"contents":[],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":406},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2019-10-02T10:58:09Z
- modifiedDate 2023-08-06T10:58:12Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid 187554406C1F44C795AB309C6DE59123
- starred false
- pinned false
- text
- richText {"contents":[],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":406},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2019-10-01T10:58:05Z
- modifiedDate 2023-08-06T10:58:07Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid 4FE668EC0211416698EA07135C7D9900
- starred false
- pinned false
- text
- richText {"contents":[],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":406},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2019-09-30T10:58:00Z
- modifiedDate 2023-08-06T10:58:02Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid B19142E667D8484DB886B6BC5D7B0CD5
- starred false
- pinned false
- text
- richText {"contents":[],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":406},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2019-09-29T10:56:09Z
- modifiedDate 2023-08-06T10:56:10Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid 16AB780D078848B285F90727A0778866
- starred false
- pinned false
- text
- creationDate 2019-09-28T10:56:12Z
- modifiedDate 2019-09-28T10:56:12Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid 972EDA9AC0F14883BDA09CEA29ED65DD
- starred false
- pinned false
- text
- creationDate 2019-09-27T10:56:14Z
- modifiedDate 2019-09-27T10:56:14Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid F328AC300882410CBEA32FC1784567D3
- starred false
- pinned false
- text
- richText {"contents":[],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":406},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2019-09-26T10:55:09Z
- modifiedDate 2023-08-06T10:55:10Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid D0EE5EBC62704067BC963D50AC4C5967
- starred false
- pinned false
- text
- richText {"contents":[],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":406},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2019-09-25T10:57:38Z
- modifiedDate 2023-08-06T10:57:41Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid BCBEFAD2191C4D3B829D9CCAA47ABACF
- starred false
- pinned false
- text
- richText {"contents":[],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":406},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2019-09-24T10:57:43Z
- modifiedDate 2023-08-06T10:57:45Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid E69417A2226E4F6882D7CF8307052DBA
- starred false
- pinned false
- text
- richText {"contents":[],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":406},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2019-09-23T10:57:56Z
- modifiedDate 2023-08-06T10:57:58Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid 9256DE1358914EE3A9C022DAB9FD379D
- starred false
- pinned false
- text
- richText {"contents":[],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":406},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2019-09-22T10:55:17Z
- modifiedDate 2023-08-06T10:55:19Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid D7EE82D5AD204950A4601C57C3423F83
- starred false
- pinned false
- text
- creationDate 2019-09-21T10:56:17Z
- modifiedDate 2019-09-21T10:56:17Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid 1797BDD4A29C4253A273F07FC8069790
- starred false
- pinned false
- text
- richText {"contents":[],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":406},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2019-09-20T10:56:20Z
- modifiedDate 2023-08-06T10:56:21Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid CBDB9FB34F664845BCCF21F2BCDDFFD9
- starred false
- pinned false
- text
- creationDate 2019-09-19T10:56:23Z
- modifiedDate 2019-09-19T10:56:23Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid 0F35E940D8E042E6A59F952379339127
- starred false
- pinned false
- text
- richText {"contents":[],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":406},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2019-09-18T10:57:34Z
- modifiedDate 2023-08-06T10:57:36Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid 9666FC1CFB6B42ECAD300C26E6A51914
- starred false
- pinned false
- text
- richText {"contents":[],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":406},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2019-09-17T10:57:48Z
- modifiedDate 2023-08-06T10:57:50Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid E4A7E6D82708457580C799C9AF3370D9
- starred false
- pinned false
- text
- richText {"contents":[],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":406},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2019-09-16T10:57:53Z
- modifiedDate 2023-08-06T10:57:54Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid 9098547CBDDB47C9A1E5BB55A8F7A105
- starred false
- pinned false
- text
- creationDate 2019-09-15T10:56:26Z
- modifiedDate 2019-09-15T10:56:26Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid 42040B70C83D419B99C32AC7D4E0C676
- starred false
- pinned false
- text
- creationDate 2019-09-14T10:56:29Z
- modifiedDate 2019-09-14T10:56:29Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid 530C8526D18C44EBA483DC78E0E468D6
- starred false
- pinned false
- text
- creationDate 2019-09-13T10:56:31Z
- modifiedDate 2019-09-13T10:56:31Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid 4E9EA188D0DE426998E566E771BAFE4B
- starred false
- pinned false
- text
- richText {"contents":[],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":406},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2019-09-12T10:55:12Z
- modifiedDate 2023-08-06T10:55:14Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid 8F7250C3D10E491394C2EFB03BE91409
- starred false
- pinned false
- text
- richText {"contents":[],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":406},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2019-09-11T10:57:21Z
- modifiedDate 2023-08-06T10:57:23Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid 602830D3D1A24A15B3874C4D3F5661E0
- starred false
- pinned false
- text '
- ,
- .
- feeling not good
- activity
- - reading
- facing reality
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"feeling not good \n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"activity\n"},{"attributes":{"line":{"checked":false,"header":0,"indentLevel":1,"listStyle":"bulleted"}},"text":"reading\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"facing reality "}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":406},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2019-09-10T10:57:25Z
- modifiedDate 2023-08-06T11:25:41Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid 076866CFA207403B9E4D5C2BB2960A02
- starred false
- pinned false
- text '
- ,
- .
- feeling not good
- guilt, guilt, guilt
- No wifi
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"feeling not good\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"guilt, guilt, guilt\n"},{"text":"No wifi"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":406},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2019-09-09T10:57:29Z
- modifiedDate 2023-08-06T11:25:02Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid FF4DE90B1089438DB061F929165BA4D6
- starred false
- pinned false
- text '
- ,
- .
- feeling good
- activity
- - guilt nap
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"feeling good\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"activity\n"},{"attributes":{"line":{"checked":false,"header":0,"indentLevel":1,"listStyle":"bulleted"}},"text":"guilt nap"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":406},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2019-09-08T10:56:36Z
- modifiedDate 2023-08-06T11:24:11Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid 81B7D9FAF9604BB0B81BA722D3D62152
- starred false
- pinned false
- text '
- ,
- .
- feeling meh
- activity
- - church
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"feeling meh\n\n"},{"text":"activity\n"},{"attributes":{"line":{"checked":false,"header":0,"indentLevel":1,"listStyle":"bulleted"}},"text":"church\n"},{"text":"\n"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":406},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2019-09-07T10:56:44Z
- modifiedDate 2023-08-06T11:23:48Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid 4B67D5CB41C54846A87F133F99B34425
- starred false
- pinned false
- text '
- ,
- .
- feeling meh
- activity
- - cleaning
- cramps
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"feeling meh\n\n"},{"text":"activity\n"},{"attributes":{"line":{"checked":false,"header":0,"indentLevel":1,"listStyle":"bulleted"}},"text":"cleaning\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"cramps "},{"text":"\n"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":406},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2019-09-06T10:56:41Z
- modifiedDate 2023-08-06T11:23:31Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid 49AF7BBB6DAF485CB9DE9AE690DA8522
- starred false
- pinned false
- text '
- ,
- .
- feeling meh
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"feeling meh"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":406},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2019-09-05T10:56:50Z
- modifiedDate 2023-08-06T11:22:02Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid C0336CFD9DD8494FBA96390217E466DC
- starred false
- pinned false
- text '
- ,
- .
- feeling meh
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"feeling meh"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":406},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2019-09-04T10:57:18Z
- modifiedDate 2023-08-06T11:22:06Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid 8228D22F05BD40368D3D2BE8E58855DC
- starred false
- pinned false
- text '
- ,
- .
- feeling meh
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"feeling meh "}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":406},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2019-09-03T10:57:13Z
- modifiedDate 2023-08-06T11:22:20Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid 6AC39D76DF1D42D7947770B66A8BC75D
- starred false
- pinned false
- text '
- ,
- .
- feeling not good
- Braison left
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"feeling not good\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"Braison left"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":406},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2019-09-02T10:57:06Z
- modifiedDate 2023-08-06T11:22:11Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid B5510CC498CD47609AA5120EAD3EDDB5
- starred false
- pinned false
- text '
- ,
- .
- feeling good
- activity
- - relax
- - family
- - good meal
- Whole chikin, mwiki site and fam
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"feeling good\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"activity\n"},{"attributes":{"line":{"checked":false,"header":0,"indentLevel":1,"listStyle":"bulleted"}},"text":"relax\n"},{"attributes":{"line":{"checked":false,"header":0,"indentLevel":1,"listStyle":"bulleted"}},"text":"family\n"},{"attributes":{"line":{"checked":false,"header":0,"indentLevel":1,"listStyle":"bulleted"}},"text":"good meal\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"Whole chikin, mwiki site and fam"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":406},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2019-09-01T10:56:47Z
- modifiedDate 2023-08-06T11:22:52Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid 0EE7EDD95E73468FA476D58E9E22918F
- starred false
- pinned false
- text '
- ,
- .
- feeling crazy 😁
- activity
- - family
- - good meal
- out, mushrooms
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"feeling crazy 😁\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"activity\n"},{"attributes":{"line":{"checked":false,"header":0,"indentLevel":1,"listStyle":"bulleted"}},"text":"family\n"},{"attributes":{"line":{"checked":false,"header":0,"indentLevel":1,"listStyle":"bulleted"}},"text":"good meal\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"out, mushrooms"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":406},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2019-08-31T10:54:55Z
- modifiedDate 2023-08-06T11:22:35Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid 030DACD35DCF4C0AAC141223624CEF42
- starred false
- pinned false
- text '
- ,
- .
- feeling meh
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"feeling meh"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":406},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2019-08-30T10:54:52Z
- modifiedDate 2023-08-06T11:19:27Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid A96E6BA65E174997A7C09C76AD7A4838
- starred false
- pinned false
- text '
- ,
- .
- feeling good
- activity
- - passing ports
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"feeling good\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"activity\n"},{"attributes":{"line":{"checked":false,"header":0,"indentLevel":1,"listStyle":"bulleted"}},"text":"passing ports"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":406},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2019-08-29T10:54:49Z
- modifiedDate 2023-08-06T11:08:16Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid 5ABA10B3BC1747939DE02C80896E8CE5
- starred false
- pinned false
- text '
- ,
- .
- feeling meh
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"feeling meh\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":406},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2019-08-28T10:54:46Z
- modifiedDate 2023-08-06T11:22:32Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid 1CBAE221A9104C47A35D6DBCD35C355C
- starred false
- pinned false
- text '
- ,
- .
- feeling meh
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"feeling meh"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":406},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2019-08-27T10:54:43Z
- modifiedDate 2023-08-06T11:22:29Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid E15A32500385424887A03020A387E296
- starred false
- pinned false
- text '
- ,
- .
- feeling good
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"feeling good"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":406},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2019-08-26T10:54:39Z
- modifiedDate 2023-08-06T11:06:45Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid 7DB76ABC443643CDB190A6F200251D14
- starred false
- pinned false
- text '
- ,
- .
- feeling meh
- activity
- - home
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"feeling meh \n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"activity\n"},{"attributes":{"line":{"checked":false,"header":0,"indentLevel":1,"listStyle":"bulleted"}},"text":"home"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":406},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2019-08-25T10:54:33Z
- modifiedDate 2023-08-06T11:06:14Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid 1BAEAE7F90FC4079B89F003C8C61231F
- starred false
- pinned false
- text '
- ,
- .
- feeling bad
- activity
- - hospital mom
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"feeling bad\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"activity\n"},{"attributes":{"line":{"checked":false,"header":0,"indentLevel":1,"listStyle":"bulleted"}},"text":"hospital mom"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":406},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2019-08-24T10:54:29Z
- modifiedDate 2023-08-06T11:19:30Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid 2F499A7D448F4BE58C1170501752D4D8
- starred false
- pinned false
- text '
- ,
- .
- feeling good
- wstd
- activity
- - cleaning
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"feeling good\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"wstd\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"activity\n"},{"attributes":{"line":{"checked":false,"header":0,"indentLevel":1,"listStyle":"bulleted"}},"text":"cleaning"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":406},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2019-08-23T10:54:26Z
- modifiedDate 2023-08-06T11:05:01Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid A0C1005981E8455FA1DDBEEA06DC85D2
- starred false
- pinned false
- text '
- ,
- .
- feeling good
- guilt but learned
- activity
- - church
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"feeling good\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"guilt but learned\n\n"},{"text":"activity\n"},{"attributes":{"line":{"checked":false,"header":0,"indentLevel":1,"listStyle":"bulleted"}},"text":"church"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":406},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2019-08-22T10:54:22Z
- modifiedDate 2023-08-06T11:04:02Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid 44A56E51B4524C66ABC5534E9B2ADC94
- starred false
- pinned false
- text '
- ,
- .
- wasted myself. wont do it again
- feeling meh
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"wasted myself. wont do it again\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"feeling meh\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":406},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2019-08-21T10:54:19Z
- modifiedDate 2023-08-06T11:03:07Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid F802ECDE4B2F4B498523B80E1730C8A4
- starred false
- pinned false
- text '
- ,
- .
- feeling bad
- activity
- - church
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"feeling bad\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"activity\n"},{"attributes":{"line":{"checked":false,"header":0,"indentLevel":1,"listStyle":"bulleted"}},"text":"church"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":406},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2019-08-20T10:54:14Z
- modifiedDate 2023-08-06T11:02:12Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid AB71A42007274800BAC57A399B4F44C4
- starred false
- pinned false
- text '
- ,
- .
- meh
- pretty unexpected
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":".\n\n"},{"text":"meh\n"},{"text":"pretty unexpected "}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":406},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2019-08-19T10:52:55Z
- modifiedDate 2023-08-06T11:01:21Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid 92E2412136424E12A01E897D9794C153
- starred false
- pinned false
- text '
- ,
- .
- so not good, colossal waste of time
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"so not good, colossal waste of time\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"\n"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":406},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2019-08-18T10:52:02Z
- modifiedDate 2023-08-06T11:00:15Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid 497A8C45E31E4269ACF1F1ECCE86B030
- starred false
- pinned false
- text '
- ,
- .
- so
- feeling meh \*2
- activity
- - cleaning
- - church
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"so\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"feeling meh *2\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"activity\n"},{"attributes":{"line":{"checked":false,"header":0,"indentLevel":1,"listStyle":"bulleted"}},"text":"cleaning\n"},{"attributes":{"line":{"checked":false,"header":0,"indentLevel":1,"listStyle":"bulleted"}},"text":"church"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":406},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2019-08-17T10:51:12Z
- modifiedDate 2023-08-06T10:52:44Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid 1C51AD8F50984E058F57B8535DFF1C22
- starred false
- pinned false
- text '
- ,
- .
- feeling meh
- activity
- - relax
- - family
- - reading
- - cleaning
- down when work week ended
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"feeling meh\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"activity\n"},{"attributes":{"line":{"checked":false,"header":0,"indentLevel":1,"listStyle":"bulleted"}},"text":"relax\n"},{"attributes":{"line":{"checked":false,"header":0,"indentLevel":1,"listStyle":"bulleted"}},"text":"family\n"},{"attributes":{"line":{"checked":false,"header":0,"indentLevel":1,"listStyle":"bulleted"}},"text":"reading\n"},{"attributes":{"line":{"checked":false,"header":0,"indentLevel":1,"listStyle":"bulleted"}},"text":"cleaning\n"},{"text":"\n"},{"text":"down when work week ended"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":406},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2019-08-16T10:50:08Z
- modifiedDate 2023-08-06T10:59:16Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid 88F18267409048A6A413999108EAF69D
- starred false
- pinned false
- text '
- ,
- .
- feeling good
- relax
- movies
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"feeling good\n\n"},{"text":"relax \n"},{"text":"movies "}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":406},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2019-08-15T10:47:31Z
- modifiedDate 2023-08-06T10:49:43Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
- uuid 41011A79E1214C7CBB5067D11A8E416E
- starred false
- pinned false
- text '
- ,
- .
- so this is from a backup of daylio
- I shall port all 202 entries
- feeling meh
- - relax
- - reading
- richText {"contents":[{"text":"\u0027\n"},{"text":",\n"},{"text":".\n"},{"text":"so this is from a backup of daylio\n"},{"text":"I shall port all 202 entries\n\n"},{"text":"feeling meh\n\n"},{"attributes":{"line":{"checked":false,"header":0,"indentLevel":1,"listStyle":"bulleted"}},"text":"relax\n"},{"attributes":{"line":{"checked":false,"header":0,"indentLevel":1,"listStyle":"bulleted"}},"text":"reading\n"},{"text":"\n"}],"meta":{"created":{"platform":"com.bloombuilt.dayone-android","version":406},"small-lines-removed":true,"version":1}}
- creationDate 2019-08-14T10:46:00Z
- modifiedDate 2023-08-06T10:47:26Z
- timeZone Africa/Nairobi
- v
[text] NigJournal
Viewer
*** This page was generated with the meta tag "noindex, nofollow". This happened because you selected this option before saving or the system detected it as spam. This means that this page will never get into the search engines and the search bot will not crawl it. There is nothing to worry about, you can still share it with anyone.
Editor
You can edit this paste and save as new:
File Description
- NigJournal
- Paste Code
- 19 Apr-2024
- 431.67 Kb
You can Share it:
Latest Code Pastes